English Puritan & Reformed

The Exceeding Riches of Grace

Henry Jessey (1603-1663) · 50,984 words · 227 min

The source for this document is https://quod.lib.umich.edu/e/eebo/A46836.0001.001

Project Note

This is licensed under Creative Commons CC BY-NC-ND. This license allows reusers to copy and distribute the material in any medium or format in unadapted form only, for noncommercial purposes only, and only so long as attribution is given to the creator.

The source of this document is the Early English Books Online (EEBO-TCP) website. Those books were transcribed in a character for character manner and can be very cumbersome to read since there was no standard spelling during that time. Many spelling variations such as "unlesse", "vnlesse", and "vnles" regularly appear.

This project was conceived to clean up those books as much as possible and make them more accessible to the interested reader, leading to the creation of a massive list of variant spellings and their corrections. This was used to clean up the text, but is of course only as complete as the list itself. Because of the nature of the original transcription, some words have missing characters or places where the original language (e.g., Greek) was not transcribed. This effort does not change that. Be aware that the original transcription can also be faulty and in some cases entire sentences may be missing.

Although this is no substitute for a properly compared, proofed, and scholarly edition, I believe that the result is a document which is far more accessible, particularly for searching for terms using standard spelling. The document has been cleaned and presented in what I hope is a pleasing and useful format for the vast majority of Christian brothers and sisters who just want access to read these spiritually nourishing works.

However, a word of warning: The Puritans were a very diverse group of people and their age was characterized with godliness, but also much upheaval, disputation and strife. They disagreed on many doctrines and some of these works contain less orthodox or Scriptural views than others. The reader is strongly advised to read with discernment, particularly if it is unknown whether author is trustworthy.

This project took a huge amount of time and skill to bring to fruition. I would particularly like to thank David Jonescue for the initial list of Puritans he found on EEBO and the concept behind this project as well as the continuous, unceasing efforts toward seeing this complete. Without his labor, this would not be available. Alex Sarrouf was invaluable in providing the initial list of over 7,000 spelling variations he had identified and corrected, as well as continuing to review more than 16,000 additions to that list for any typos.

Logan West
(with David Jonescue and Alex Sarrouf)
www.puritansearch.org

The exceeding Riches of GRACE ADVANCED By the Spirit of Grace, in an Empty Nothing Creature, viz.

M ^ris SARAH WIGHT, Lately hopeless and wrestles, her soul dwelling far from Peace or hopes thereof.

Now hopeful, and joyful in the LORD, that hath caused LIGHT to shine out of DARKNES ; that in and by this Earthen Vessel, holds forth his Own eternal Love, and the Glorious Grace of Jesus Christ, to the CHIEFEST of SINNERS.

Who desired that others might hear and know, what the LORD had done for her soul, (that was so terrified day and night:) and might neither PRESUME, nor DESPAIR and murmur against God, as she hath done.

Published for the Refreshing of poor souls, by an Eye and Ear-witness of a good part thereof, HENRY JESSE, a servant of JESUS CHRIST.

The second Edition, corrected, and Proofs added.

LONDON ; Printed by Matthew Simmons for Henry Overton, and Hannah Allen, and are to be sold at their Shops in Popes -head Alley, 1647.

TO HIS CHRISTIAN FRIENDS, Beloved in the LORD, in London, Cambridge, Yorkshire, Suffolk, Essex, and elsewhere; The Exceeding Riches of Grace be advanced.

My Beloved;

MY Spirit rejoiceth in the Lord, who hath put such an opportunity as this into my hand, of Publishing to you, and to others, (and hereby of Advancing, ) The Exceeding Riches of the Grace of God, in such a Pattern thereof, as here followeth: The Daughter of a gracious Matrone, of mine acquaintance in the Parish where I weekly Preach in London: who was in as hopeless and desperate a condition in her self, as ever was any. Now often admiring, and uttering to others, especially to afflicted, despairing, mournful souls, (that resort now to her,) the unsearchable Treasures of Grace, to the ungodly, and chiefest of lost, undone sinners. The main Causes urging me to Publish it to you, and the Contents thereof, are in the Books beginning: The several Uses are in the End. You know that the works of Jehovah are great, honorable, wonderful, and glorious; and are greatly to be magnified; sought out of all them that have pleasure therein: He makes them to be remembered. (Ps. 111. 2, 3, 4.) Especially his works of tender-Mercies, which are over (and upon ) all his works. How desirable is it to one, and to the friends of one, that is in great extremity of misery, bodily, or spiritual; to hear of another, that was just in the same condition, that now is cured? How much longed for, is a safe Harbor, to a weather-beaten Ship, tossed with Tempests? (Isa. 54. 11.) How refreshful is rest and ease, to a tempted, hurried, wearied soul? ( Job 7.2-4.) How joyful and beautiful is the glad tidings of the Gospel of Peace, of riches of Grace, of the perfect righteousness of Christ, for the chief of sinners, enemies, murmurers, ungodly ones? to souls wearied out in looking on themselves, and their sins, and desperate wickedness of their own hearts; and that gladly would mend all, and patch up a righteousness in themselves, or partly there: ( Rom. 10.3.) that would first find a thorough change in them, such a dying of sin, and holy walking; before they think they may believe that Christ died for such as they ; or justifies such ungodly ones; How mighty (through God) may it be, to support poor souls, that are persuaded they are reprobates , that are assured of it upon certain grounds, (as they judge;) and that they are damned , and in Hell already; that never any in their case was, or can be saved ; that the sins of Manasseh, of David, of Peter, of Paul, of Mary Magdalene, yea, and of Cain, Judas, and Pilate, are all less then their sins, & blasphemies; and if all they might be saved, yet themselves should surely be damned: for such to hear of one, that but lately was in the very same condition; now sounding forth, and wondering at, the Exceeding Riches of Grace to her, the chiefest of sinners, ( Psal. 35.10.) to hear her self telling such despairing souls; You cannot be more desperate, or more certain of hell and wrath, then I lately was: and comforting them, by the same consolations, wherewith her own soul is now comforted in the Lord. (2 Cor. 1.4.) This, all this, you have here held forth, in this Pattern of God's patience, and abundant goodness towards this his unworthy Handmaid, whose low & base estate he hath regarded: He causing LIGHT to shine out of DARKNES, (2 Cor. 4.6.) The writing, transcribing, and often perusing hereof, hath been, and is sweet and precious to me, I must confess: I with your reading it may be so, and much more, to your souls.

As you read, Consider; Admire the LORD in his surpassing Grace to ungodly ones. ( Mic. 7.18.) Do not so commend the party, that is but an Earthen vessel, born in sin, as you are: but still, all along exalt and commend the LORD, who alone is to be exalted, (Isa. 2.11. 1 Cor. 1.29, 30, 31.) Who puts his treasure into an Earthen vessel of purpose, that the excellency of the power may be of God, and not of flesh. (2 Cor. 4. 7.) Be the more vile in your own eyes, when you see, God is pacified towards you, for all that you have done, (Ezek. 16. 63.) And from believing his love to your souls; in love study what you should render to him, in Christ's Name, (Psal. 116.12. Col. 3.17.) Praise the Lord for leaving such Patterns of his Riches of Grace, [as that of M ^ris Drake Revived, and that of God's gracious thoughts, towards great sinners, (by D ^r Homes ;) in a late Book, so called; so] especially this: And Pray for her, [if the Lord shall restore her body, which as yet is weak, to eat at all, or to drink but very little, (of fair water, or small Beer, and that only at once in two, or three, or four days:) and by her daily spending that small strength she hath, by often uttering forth the treasures of Grace, and by oft speaking to comfort despairing souls: seven or moe whereof have resorted to her:] that she may walk humbly, rendering again in her measure, according to the benefit done unto her. [Since the former was fitted for the Press, she then not being likely to live, unless the Lord should work a Miracle: He raised her wonderfully, by faith in his Son, without any means, (when she could use none;) and that by two degrees: First, to EATE, and to ARISE, ( Iun. 11. 1647.) Then (on Midsummer day,) to WALK; as both follow, near the end of the Book, Pag. 133. to 143.] And Pray for despairing souls, (here now being many of them) and for the more exalting of Jesus Christ, in the pouring out of his Spirit upon his sons and daughters that believe, by stretching out his hand to heal, (souls and bodies:) and that Signs and wonders may be done in his Name; As the Disciples prayed, Act. 4. 29. as he hath promised, Job. 7. 38, 39. Mark. 16. 17. Act. 2. 38. That the Earth (which now is so full of smoke and darkness,) may be filed with the knowledge of the LORD, as the waters cover the Sea, That envy may depart, all enemies being subdued, and wars ceasing, edifying-love may so abound among all Saints, that all may know who are Christ's Disciples, by the love they have one towards another ; The God of Heaven letting up his kingdom, (that fifth Monarchy ) that shall stand forever, ( Dan. 2.35-44.) The assured hopes of which joyful time, [in the midst of present fears. oppositions, dissentings of brethren , ( some beating their fellow servants ;) and thoughts of persecutions, desolations, that hour of Temptation that shortly cometh upon all the world ; have greatly rejoiced, and exceedingly gladded ( as still they do ) the heart of

Your endeared Brother, and companion in the tribulation, and kingdom, and patience of Jesus Christ, HENRIE JESSE, aliàs HENRIE JACIE.

TO HIS RESCPECTED FRIEND AND CHRISTIAN SISTER, M ^ris MARIE WIGHT, widow, in Lawrence Pountney in London.

HOnoured Sister, I salute you in our Lord Jesus.

To this Relation following touching your beloved Daughter, [ the most whereof yourself, and a good part whereof, your Son, ( by a special Providence of God, bringing him from Oxford hither, at that time of love,) have been both Eye- and Ear-witnesses,] as you have the nearest interest of any: so it cannot but be acceptable to you, to retain such a Monument of the Exceeding Riches of GOD'S GRACE manifested to her, and uttered by her; that until April 6. for four years together, had been so deeply afflicted in Spirit, tossed with Tempest, and not comforted. Whereby both yourself, and all your Christian friends in London, Daintrie, in and about Shrewsbury, and elsewhere, that have known your Sisters sad condition; and have prayed and mourned for her; now that God hath restored comforts to her, and to her mourners, ( Isa. 57, 18.) they may the more be stirred up to praise and magnify the Name of the God of Pardone, the God that heareth Prayer. And if the Lord please to move in the reading hereof, it may administer some door of hope, to some other poor souls, that are in as sad a condition, in as woeful and doleful a plight, as your Daughter lately was in, and had so continued, especially since she was about eleven or twelve years of age, till now of late, that she is towards sixteen, as you more fully know. I do acknowledge the LORD'S goodness, and bless his holy Name for his gracious dispensation towards me, that by means of M ^r is Sarah Jones ( then of Lambeth) he brought me to sympathize with you, when (about ten or eleven years ago) your soul was (as it had been for some years together,) in sad despair: and that soon after he refreshed me with the refreshings that he gave in to your soul. And that hereby the most wise God, made such way for acquainting me so fully also, first with your beloved Daughter Sarah her sorrowful, and then with her so joyful estate: and that gave me so many opportunities of being frequently with her, that I also with yourself, might be a witness of both; and might be an instrument of Publishing to the world, THE EXCEEDING RICHES OF HIS GRACE, EXALTED towards her; and by her to many sad despairing souls, and to others: So as I hope the Lord will make it instrumental for the great refreshing of many poor, sinful, sorrowful, weary souls; that thus may be partakers of the same.

When some shall hear that when your Daughter was struck both Deafe and Blind, and so could neither hear the Word, nor read it; that then should be the time of love. And when they shall read such unfoldings of Gospel- Mysteries by a child, newly comforted, before she could hear any Creature speak to her ; (pag. 16.) such descantings on several choice Scriptures, discovering the Gospels pith and marrow, that was folded up therein: so amplifying them by illustrations, and making such application: some will be ready to reject all, as incredible: some will gaze on you, or say ; Blessed is the womb that bare such a child; instead of exalting God alone. Then have you need to remember what answer Jesus Christ gave to such an expression, (Luk. 11. 27, 28.) and what he said, Rejoice not in this,—but rather rejoice that your Name is written in Heaven. When some shall read, how her eyes and ears were opened, first for a time, when was greatest need, and shut again for a season; and how when in human reason, she was unlike to live two days more: that then, and not till then the Lord should raise her up by Faith, to EÀTE and ARISE; and then to WALK, (pag. 133-138-141.) they will wonder. And some will come, or send to you, to your son, and to your daughter, to inquire about it; as some came to Hezekijah, to inquire of that wonder, that was occasioned by him, (2 Chron. 32. 24-31.) The lifting up of his heart thereupon, and his not rendering according to the benefit done unto him: [ which you heard sweetly opened and applied, on the day of Thankesgiving, for your daughters restoring ; pag. 144.] and his humbling himself for that lifting up of his heart; are all writ for our instruction and benefit: as also Herod's taking Glory to himself, Act. 12.22, 23. and Christ's warning against this, Joh. 5.44. All this showing what we are subject unto; and what cause there is to look up to Jesus Christ our strength, our all in all; that he would not leave us to ourselves; but make us like himself, humble, (Phil. 2.3-9.) and like his Apostles, that rent their garments when they were admired; and led such out to the alone exalting of the God of Heaven himself in his Son, (Act. 14. 14. Act. 3. 12, 13.) Who shortly will bring down every high thing, and he alone will be exalted in the Earth: When great voices shall say, THE KINGDOMES OF THIS WORLD, ARE BECOME OUR LORD'S, AND HIS CHRIST'S; AND HE SHALL REIGNE TO THE AGES OF AGES, Rev. 11. 13-15. Even so, Come Lord Jesus; Amen. The joy hereof frequently refresheth with the refreshings of God: London ( 2 ^d Moonth Ziu, 2 ^d day. Vulg. April 27. Revised AEthanim 3. Vulg. September. 21. 1647.

Your fellow-servant and Brother, having & holding the witness of Jesus ;HENRIE JESSE, aliàs HENRIE JACIE.

MAy 24. 1647. M ^ris SARAH WIGHT, being then still very weak in body, (and keeping bed since April 6. ) said thus to the Relator : I would others might hear how graciously the Lord hath dealt with me, the chiefest of sinners, that none might DESPAIR and murmur, as I have done: Though I murmured as they in the Wildernes, as much as those that sell, yet he hath brought me into the land of Canaan : and hath brought Legion to her right mind, and set her at his feet. I was strongly persuaded that what I did eat or drink, it was as the unworthy eating the Sacrament, I still did cat and drink my own damnation : everything I did, or saw, was terror to me. So it remained, and might have remained forever, had not his loving kindness prevented me, and drawn me to himself.

O that all creatures, reasonable and unreasonable, might praise the Name of the Lord And I would others might hear of this, that none might PRESUME : For if they knew the terrors that I have felt, the terrors of Hell, for sinning against light, against God, and against a Parent, for murmuring, lying, revolting; (judging I had committed that impardonable sin,) if they knew what it is to have God hide his face, and be as an enemy, they would not presume.

To the Christian Reader, GRACE and PEACE.

MAny of these precious Pearls, these hidden Mysteries of the Treasury of the glorious Gospel being gathered and stored up together by the Relator, as they were brought to light day by day, before the 27 ^th of April last: Divers Christian friends, that had been partakers thereof, judged it unmeet they should be hid and hoarded up for a few to enjoy in private: much desiring they might be published, both for better supply to themselves, and to many others whom the Lord might please to support, refresh, and enrich thereby: When no more was gathered then what might be contained in two sheets or three.

The Earthly Vessel of conveyance being then most likely to return to earth, within a few days. Hence was the more cause of willingness to yield to this desire; and to prefix the Letter foregoing (for the better confirmation hereof) writ April 27. 1647. After that day she remaining as weak as before, and unable to eat at all for eleven weeks together; or to drink, but only once in two or three, or once in four or five days: and still drinking less and less, then that before: ( Pag. 55, 56.) and her drink being only fair water, till April 19. and sometimes small beer afterwards (never strong beer.) Thus was this put to the Press, and in the mean while, one day after another was occasion of enlarging it, by Conferences, &c. and of her still drawing nearer death, in outward appearance, till June 11. And before June 11. and June 25. 1647. ( which were the days of the Lord's wonderful raising up her body by Faith, as is shown pag. 135.-) a good part thereof was printed. Yet seeing the more goodness the Lord magnified towards her, the chiefest of sinners ; the more his love therein melts and abaseth her; (as Pag. 119. 125. 134. the LORD so abase her still: ) Its hoped the LORD will keep her soul in that humble frame: whereby the publishing hereof, which may be for great refreshing to many sad, troubled, disconsolate souls, and to others, who through God may reap abundant fruit hereby; may be no hurt to her; nor any cause at all of repenting, to the Relator, or others; but of rejoicing and thanksgiving to many: which is the longing desire, and humble request of Him that longeth to be made more conformable to the death of Christ: to die to himself, and to live to God; and to walk in, and be led by the Spirit.

H. J.

A Postscript to the Reader.

For better satisfying some, that would know many particulars distinctly, or else they will not believe what wonders are here mentioned: Here is added, touching this hand-maids Parents: Her Father was M ^r Thomas Wight, (pag. 5.) son to M ^r Wight of Daintree ; and Brother to M ^r Nat. Wight, Preacher in Tewksbury: Her Mother, M ^ris Mary Wight, above seven years ago was also in deep terror and distraction of Spirit, (then living near London-stone: ) till the Lord's good time of refreshing came. The Maid that tended on her, (hereafter mentioned,) known to M ^r Cradock of Wales, is well known to many of his London acquaintance: Her name is, Hannah Guy, daughter to M ^r Eli-Iabu Guy, late of Ireland of Trayleigh in Munster Province: (whose Father went thither, to avoid the Ceremonies here urged.) The Testimony of these two, the Mother and this Maid, of her drinking so little, & not eating at all, for so long, (from March 27. till June 11. pag. 55. &c.) both these being of approved faithfulness, may be sufficient. (2 Cor. 13. 1.) Of the expressions from pag. 35. to the end of the Book, the Relator was with them, an ear-witness generally. [A great part of nine leaves, was taken by him from the Relation of them, or one of them, being writ as they spake, Verbatim ; ( viz. from pag. 16. to pag. 35.) Some of the Repetitions therein, especially of two Names, being taken with the rest; so passed to the Press with the rest: which now the Relator likes not, wishing they had been forborne. Thou art entreated therefore to excuse it: and what other failings are, or appear to be. Remembering, In many things we all slip, Jam. 3. 2. Gal. 6. 1, 2.]

Amongst others that have been with this Handmaid, were these, of esteem amongst many that fear the Lord in London ; viz. M ^r Prime of Cambridge, now Minister in Lawrence Pountney, (lately of Black Friars ;) M ^r Cradock Minister in Nicholas lane, M ^r Barker Minister at Garlic -hill, M ^r Brag from about Bristol, M ^r Isaac Knight late of Holland, Captain Harrison: The Lady Mayerne ; and M ^ris Jane Done her sister; Lady Hartop, with M ^ris Fant her sister, (now M ^ris Stock ) and M ^r Ric-Wollaston: M ^ris Rolls, wife to Judge Rolls, M ^ris Mary Leeb, Hanna Trapnel, Dinah the Blackmore; and those that are named pag. 8. 9, 10. and many others. The Reason of naming many, is there rendered, viz. that some more incredulous, might the sooner believe, and reap benefit, and not reject the mysteries of God, against themselves, to their hurt. ( Luk. 7.30.) Which may plead excuse for naming them. John. 4. 39. For the saying of the Woman, many of the Samaritans believed on Jesus. Joh. 12. 11. Joh. 11. 45. By reason of Lazarus being so raised up, many believed on Jesus. Act. 9. 42. By making knows his raising up of Dorcas, many believed on the Lord.

If some yet say ; How is it possible, that one so young, and never understanding to purpose till now, should be able so to speak? It is answered ; This is the Lord's work, and it is marvelous in our eyes: who out of the mouth of babes and sucklings, hath ordained strength, & perfected praise, Mat. 21. 16. And hath promised to his, to pour out of his Spirit in the last days, upon them, and upon their children, their sons and daughters, Act. 2. 17. 33. 38, 39. Our Lord Jesus promised to his Disciples, that his Holy Spirit should bring to their remembrance, what he had said to them, Joh. 14. 26. This good Spirit brought to her remembrance now, when it was most useful, what she had read and heard formerly, and opened her heart to understand them: and opened her mouth to utter them in an humble, melting manner; as he had opened to her; even when her bodily eyes and ears were held; which since April 19. are both of them opened.

H. I.

M ^r Saltmarsh his Letter. For my dear and honored Friend and Cosen, M H. JACIE.

Dear Cosen;

I Salute you in the Lord. I did much rejoice in those breathings of the Spirit of God which I found in your little Book OF THE RICHES OF GRACE ADVANCED, &c. Surely, the Lord is teaching his people, and fulfilling his promises; They shall be all taught of God: (Joh. 6. 45.) And thus his New Covenant with his people shall be more and more revealed, and the Lord alone shall be exalted in that day, (Isa. 2.11.) When I meet with such precious manifestations of the Lord, me thinks I taste those waters of life, those rivers of living water which shall show out of the bellies of those, who believe in Christ, (Joh. 7. 38.) There is not a stream of this water, but it proceeds from the Throne of Grace, ( Rev. 22. 1. Zach. 14.8,9.) though it flow in the valleys, in the poor, low, and humble Christians.

I find in this Spiritual Treatise of yours, two things very experiment all ; the one is her Legal, and the other her more Gospel condition: In the first, she is in bondage, in blackness, and darkness, and tempest ; in much distress, and shadow of death, her life drawing nigh unto hell: and afflicted with all his waves, (Psal. 88.3.7.) In her Gospel state, I find God showing wonders to the dead, making the dead to rise and praise him; showing his loving kindness in the grave, and his faithfulness in destruction: and making known his glory in the dark, and his righteousness in the land of forgetfulness, (Psal. 88.10, 11, 12.) And truly the voice of joy and gladness is in the tabernacles of the righteous, (Psal. 118. 15.) I find that when God reveals himself in Christ, in his grace and love, the Spirit of the Christian is sweetly raised, and cheered, and the love of the Lord is as wine, even as the spiced wine. I make no question, but the Lord will fill this soul with more discoveries, then this of the Riches of grace ; this truth being that first discovery of God in love.

Dear Cosen, you do well thus to watch the appearances of God in his, and to publish them to the Saints.

I am yours in the Lord, JOHN SALTMARSH.

The CONTENTS or TABLE of the Book.

Of this Hand-maid, her education, Parents, and dwelling, pag. 4, 5, 6.
Her Deep afflictions ;
- 1. In Spirit, pag. 6. to 15. 10. 42, 43. 59, 60. 67. 70. 78. 109. 112. 127.
- 2. In body, pag. 7. end. 22. 31. end. 55. 78. 115. 128.
Her souls deliverance, pag. 15. 35. 40. 54. 59. 67. 86. 89.
Her sight and hearing given at greatest need, pag. 24, 25. 29. 34. 43, end.
The Lord refreshing her, unable to eat or drink for many days, pag. 15. 18. 20, 21. 55. 57. 91. 116. 131. (Her brother hoped for it. pag. 5. and saw. pag. 30.)
The Lord's power excellent, by this earthly vessel, (being in trances,) opening his Gospel-treasure, pag. 15. to 33. (54.86.) Whilst she was blind and deaf, 34. [ Which, after her hearing was restored, she remembered not at all. ] Of like expressions after it, pag. 35. to 43. 51. &c.
CONFERENCES with some troubled about SIN, with a Maid, with M ^ris A. 44, 45. to 48. with one, 61. to 64. with another, 65. another, 72. with another, 76. another, 81. with another, 99 another, 105. with another, 122.
Other Conferences about her eating, 57, 58 about her condition now, 85. future, 89. About Ordinances, 87. 118. About Differences among Saints, 88. 39. Powring out the Spirit, 90. New Covenant, all free, 91. The Law, 92. 94. 115 Duties, 93. 118. Endeavors, 64. 94. Of General Redemption, Free-will, Falling away, 95, 96, 97.
Punishment for sin, 98. Why weak, after comfort, 115. 128. Of enduring Christ's reproach 117. Content with Christ alone, 117. 22. Not loving God, not before, 117. Not proud by visiters, 119. Of the Trinity, 120. Justification and Sanctification by Christ, 121. Items against receiving or telling false reports, 125. (Praises in Zion, 119.) Against stubbornness, or murmuring 24, 30. Against lying, and wronging Conscience pag. 7. 153-155.
To be trained up in holy Scriptures, pag. 6.3 • 42. 59, 60. Against unmercifulnes, 103, 104.
The Lord raiseth her body being nearest death 132. by Faith, 135. to arise and eat, 138. walk, 141.
A Thankesgiving day: Order, 144.
Sum, and USES of all, 151.
Cautions about OATHS, 155.

A TABLE of many of the choice places of holy SCRIPTURE, that in this Book are cited, opened, illustrated, or applied. (Where (*) is here added, the Translation is nearer the Hebrew or Greek.)

: Page.
GEn. 22. 14. Jehovah jireh, God will see.: 156. ^d
ve. 18. Gen. 26 4. All Nations-blessed.: 97 ^a 124. ^q
Gen. 41.14. Joseph's garments changed.: 101. ^t
Exod. 19. 4. Bare you on Eagles wings.: 149. ^a
Ex. 34.6. Gracious, merciful, longsuffering.: 53.105. ^e
Levite.16.21. Scape-Goat bears sin to Wildernes.: 67. ^k
Num. 11.11. Manna -color as Bdellium.: 38. ^o
Num. 21. 9. Looking to brazen Serpent, healed.: 81. ^m
Deut. 29. 29. Secrets belong to God.: 61. ^e
Judge. 14. 23. If he would destroy us, would be-: 124.
1 Sam. 2. 6. He kills and makes alive-to grave.: 62. ^d
2 King. 21. 16. Streets full of blood, yet saved.: 17. ^k
2 Chro. 20. 15. Fear not-battle is not yours.: 107. ⁿ
Ch. 32.25. But Hezekiah rendered not according.: 144.
Neh. 8. 10. Eat, send portions, (at thanksgiving): 145.
Job 3. 3. Jer. 20. 20. Of cursing the birth.: 12
Job 34.29. If he give quietness, who-trouble?: 41. ^c 69. ^r
v. 31. Its meet to say to God, that which I see not.: 64.
Ps. 8. 5. † Man lower then Angels (that is † Christ): 42. ^a
Ps. 9.10. They that know thy Name, will trust.: 37. ⁱ
Ps. 28.4. (Ps. 92.5,6.) Regard not the works of.: 152
Psal. 34. 4. Saved me from all my fears.: 35. 114.
Ps. 36.6. He saves man and beast: so saves all men.: 97
* Ps. 40.9-11. Close not up thy bowels of mercies.: 2.
Ps. 41. 1,2. Blessed,-that considereth the poor.: 104. ^d
Ps. 46. 1. God is a Refuge- a present help.: 61. ^a
Ps. 65. 1. Praise waits for God in Zion. Why so?: 119. ⁿ
Ps. 68.18. Christ received gifts for the Rebellious.: 66. ^g
Ps. 77. 2. My soul refused to be comforted.: 104. ^g
Vers. 8. 10. Hide thee forever? tis my infirmity.: 80.
Ps. 72.11-17. All Kings-All Nations shall serve.: 98.
Ps. 73. 1. Yet God is good to Israel, pure in heart.: 68. ^q
*Ps. 85.8. They shall not return to folly.: 80.
Ps. 87. 7. All my springs are in Christ.: 49.
Ps. 91. 16. With long life will I satisfy him.: 133.
Ps. 107. 5. O that men would praise the Lord !: 42.
Ps. 110. 3. Willing, in the day of thy power.: 62. ⁱ 63. ^m .
Ps. 113.7,8. Raiseth from dunghill-sets with.: 111. ^g
Ps. 130.1. Out of the depths of misery, have I called.: 63. ^f
V. 4. Mercy with thee, that thou mayest be feared.: 79. ^d
Psal. 138. 2. Word above all thy Name.: 152.
Psal. 144. 15. Happy is the people whose God is.: 23. ^m
Ps. 147.2. He gathereth the Outcasts.: 84.104. ^h . 110.
Prov. 18.17. First in his own cause, seems just.: 125. ^f
Pro. 21.13. He that stops his ear at the poor's-: 104. ^d
Pro. 22.6. Train up a child in the way he should go.: 6.
V. 1. A good Name is rather-then great riches.: 127.
Cant. 1.3. By ointment poured forth, virgins love.: 90.
V. 5. I am black. Cant. 4.7. All fair-no spot in.: 123. ^l
Cant. 2.3. As an Apple tree, so is my beloved, how?: 31. ^d
Cant. 2.4,5. He had me into his wine-cellar.: 57. ^o
V. 8. He comes leaping over mountains, skipping.: 100. ^l
V. 10.11. Arise, Winter is past, Summer is come.: 142.
Cant. 8.6. Make as a signet-as a seal on the heart.: 20. ^g
Isa. 8. 17. Wait on him that hides-: 32,33. w. 71.124.
Isa. 14. 1. The Lord had mercy on sinful Jacob.: 68.
Ver. 3. Hard bondage, thou wast made to serve.: 68. ^m
Isa. 24. 16. Glorify God in the fires.: 89.
Isa. 26.11. Thy hand is lifted up, they will not see.: 152.
Isa. 29. last. They that murmured, shall learn.: 159.
Isa. 30. 18. The Lord waits to be gracious.: 95. ^a 112. ^b
Isa. 32. 9. 11. Woe to careless daughter-at ease-: 152.
Isa. 40.11. Christ carries his Lambs in his bosom.: 33. ^c
Ver. 28. Jehovah faints not, neither is weary.: 156. ^o
Isa. 41. 10. Fear not, I will help thee.: 77. ^x
Isa. 42. 8. My glory I will not give to an image.: 156.g
Isa. 43. 13. I work, & who shall let it?: 62. ^h . 76. ^u 124. ^a
V. 25. Wearied yet-I, I, blotting out.: 20. ^h 42. 89.109. ^d
Isa. 44.3. I pour water on dry ground.: 124. ^c
V. 22. I blot out thy transgressions as a thick cloud.: 20. ^k
Isa. 46.3, 4. To hoary hairs will I carry thee: 33. ^u
Isa. 49.8. In an acceptable time have I beard thee.: 70. ^u
Isa. 49.14. Zion said, the Lord hath forsaken me.: 32. ^p
Isa. 50.10 Walk in darkness-trust in the Name.: 33.74. ^l
Isa. 53.2. We saw no form nor comeliness in Christ.: 117. ^h
Isa. 54.8. In a little wrath-but-everlast. kindness.: 180.
V. 10. Mountains shall remove-but not my love.: 110. ^m
Isa. 55.8. My thoughts are not your thoughts.: 46 ^d 78. ^b
Isa. 57. 19. I create-peace, to him thats far off.: 88.
Isa. 59. 16. His own arm laid hold on Salva.: 75. ^p 114. ^c
Isa. 63.10. They rebelled, & vexed his spirit, yet saved.: 46.
Isa. 64. 6. Our righteousness is as filthy rags.: 101. ^t
Isa. 65. 1. I am found of them than sought me.: 64. ^g 70.
JER. 2.2-6. Israel was holiness-the Lord brought.: 124.
Jer. 2.13. My people forsake fountain of living.: 83. ^f
V. 34. Her skirt is full blood, yet mercy.: 17,18. ^k
Jer. 3.1-14. Played the Harlot-turn- I am.: 17, 18.
V. 12. 22. Turn I will beale your back slidings.: 75. ^r
Jer. 4.2. Swear-in truth, in judgment, & in rig.: 155
Jer. 5. 11, 12. Judah belied the Lord said it is not.: 81.
Jer.8.22. Is there no balm in Gilead? Healing.: 66.
Jer. 30. 15. 18. My wound is incurable-yet.: 84. 110.
V. 16. Thy words were found, and I did eat them.: 116.
Jer. 17.9. Heart deceitful-desperate-yet cured.: 63. ^e 66. ^d
Je. 23.6. Christ is righteousness to sinners.: 81. ^g
Jer. 23. 10. Because of Oaths the Land mourns.: 156.
V. 29. Is not my word-a fire, and like a Hammer?: 83. ^a
Jer. 31.18. Vntamed heifer,: 38. ^l 52. ^b 85. ^a 109. ^c 115.
V. 25. He will satiate the weary soul & replenish.: 113. ^l
Jer. 31.31-34. I make a new Covenant, He put.: 20. ^b 92.
Jer. 32. 17. Nothing is too hard for God.: 82.
Ver. 39. I will give them one heart-to fear me.: 83.
V. 40. Fear-And they shall not depart from me.: 105.
*Jer.46.28. Vnpunished .r. unvisited, so* Amos: 3.3. 98.
Jer. 51.5. Israel is not forsaken-of his.: 83. ^c 105.g 109. ^k
Ezek. 16.6. In thy blood I said, live.: 91.123. ^m
V. 8. This was the time of love.: 61.
Ezek. 16. 10. 14. I clothed thee with Christ's gar.: 101.
Ezek. 18.31, 32. Turn ye-why will ye die?: 52. ^a
Ezek. 33.11. As I live, I have no plea.: 10.73. ^c . 96, 97.
Ezek. 36.25, 26. I will give you a new heart.: 76. 123. ^o
Dan.2.34, 35. Stone (Christ's kingdom) set up.: 98.
Dan. 9.3.20. He set himself to prayer, then answ.: 95. ^b
Dan. 10.19. Be strong, yea be strong with power.: 142.
Hosea 1. 1-2. Not a people-children.: 102 ^o . 105. ⁱ
Hosea 2.7.14.19. Lost, in wilderness, comf.: 80. ^k l 107. ^q
Hosea 11.3. I taught Ephraim to go he knew not.: 66. ^f
Hosea 11.8, 11,12. Grievous sins, yet saved.: 85. ^b 109.
Hosea 13.9. Thou hast destroyed thyself, yet saved.: 97.
Hosea 14.20. Say unto God, heal back slidings.: 64.
Ver. 3. With thee fatherless sinned mercy.: 107. ^q
Ver. 4. I will heal back slidings.: 63. ^y
Micah 7.18. Who is like to thee, pard.: 18. ^m 83.156. ^f
Habak. 2.3. Vision will speak, though it tarry.: 69. ^t
Zeph. 3.12. An afflicted and poor people shall.: 67. ^l
Zacha. 1.8.10. A vision of horses, (sign Angels. ): 149. ^b
Zac. 12.10. See Christ whom they pier.: 36. ^c 54. ^k . 75. ^q
Zach. 13. 1. Fountain (Christ) open for sin.: 17. ^h
Mal. 3. 17. Be mine-when I make up my Jewels.: 19. ^g
MATTH. 1.1-6. House of David, is of Judah*.: 17.
Mat. 3.17. Mat. 17. 5. In him I am well.: 95. ⁱ 150.
Mat. 4. 1. Christ was led into Wildernes to be.: 80. ⁱ
Mat. 4.4. Man lives not by bread-but by word.: 58. ^p
Mat. 8. end. & Mark. 5.15. Legion cast.: 47. ^b 102.126.
Mat. 9.13. I came not to call the righteous.: 94. ^g 112. ^w
Mat. 10.42. He that gives a cup of water, rew.: 21. ^b
Mat. 11.28. Come to me ye that are weary, and.: 72. ^b
Mat. 20. 16. Few are chosen (& yet many: how?): 131. ^b
*Mat. 21.5. read, On an Ass, *even on a.: *31.19.38.
Mat. 25.6. At midnight called to go to Christ.: 112.
Mat. 26.41. The spirit is willing, but flesh weak.: 62. ^k
Mat. 26.72. Mar. 14.71. Christ died for.: 18. ^d 46 ^f 112.
Mat. 27.5. Judas did undo himself, (or dissolved.): 129.*
MARK. 1.30. Anon they tell Jesus-she ministered.: 136.
Mar. 4.28. Corn grows up, first the blade, then-: 100. ⁿ
Mar. 5. (15. Legion. 47. ^b 126.) v. 34. Thy faith-: 100. ^o
V. 41. Talitha cumi, Damsel-arose, -walked, and-: 137.
Mar. 10.45. Christ came-to minister, & give.: 131.136.
Ver. 49. Be of good comfort, arise, he calls thee.: 136.
(Mar. 14.71. see Mat. 26.72.) Mar. 16.7. Go-: 18. ^e 112. ^y
Mar. 16. 9. Mary Magdalene had seven Devils.: 46. ^q
V. 17. Believers in his name shall cast out Devils.: 145.
*Luk. 1.48. The base estate of his handmaid.: 54. ⁱ 36. ^b
V. 53. Christ fills the hungry with good.: 18. ^b
V. 79. Christ is light-in darkness.: 107. ^p
Luk. 2.7.12. Christ was laid in a manger.: 16. ^a 18. ^a
Luk. 3.5. Every mountain shall be laid.: 28. ^m 52. ^b 53. ^c
Luk. 4.18. Christ is sent to open the blind.: 62. ^b 104.
Luk. 5.20.25. Man thy sins are forgiven thee.: 136.
Luk. 7.14. Young man I say to thee arise.: 136.
Luk. 8. 54. Maid arise, and her spirit came, and-: 136.
Luk. 10.20. Rejoice not in this, but-that your.: 145.
V. 33. Christ is the good Samaritan, that.: 34. ^d 40. ^a
Luk. 11.22. Christ the stronger dispossesseth Sat.: 19. ^d
V. 31. Queen of Sheba came from far, to hear.: 126. ^f
Luk. 18. 10. 14. Poor publican is justified rather.: 17. ^c
Ver. 8. Shall be find faith on the earth?: 66. ⁱ
Luk. 9. 6. Christ came not to destroy, but save.: 61. ^d
Luk. 15.14-32. Prodigals father rejoiced over.: 68. ^c
Luk. 15. 16. Houses (our own righteousness) satisfi.: 86.
Luk. 18. 27. What's impossible with men-with.: 77. ^y
Luk. 19.10. Son of man came to seek & save that.: 48. ^a
Luk. 22. 32. Peter sinned; yet was saved.: 18. ^d
Luk. 24.25.37. Slow to believe-count it a delusion.: 82.
V. 26. Christ must first suffer, then be glorified.: 18. ^p
V. 46, 47. Repentance to be preached in Christ's-: 105.
JOHN 1. 1. 14. The Word (the Son) was flesh.: 121 ^h
V. 16. Of his fullness have we all received.: 117. ^f
Joh. 3.14. Christ healed the stung by Satan.: 81. ⁿ 122. ^o
Joh. 4.10. If thou knewest Christ, ask and have.: 20. ^f
Joh. 5.2-5. Man waiting at Bethesday, Christ.: 95. ^c
Ver. 8. Jesus said unto him, arise-and walk.: 141.95. ^o
Ver. 40. You will not believe, and so have life.: 18. ^f
Ver. 44. How can you believe-that seek not-God.: 119. ⁿ
Joh. 6.37. All that the Father giveth me, shall.: 120. ^d
Ver. 44. None can come to me, except the father.: 120. ^c
Ver. 51.55. Christ's flesh is meat for the.: 57. ⁿ 90. 124. ^p
Joh. 8.36. The Son makes men free indeed.: 104. ^f 111. ^u
Joh. 14. 6. Christ is the way to the Father.: 95. ^h
Ver. 16. The Spirit is sent in Christ's Name.: 121. ^k
Joh. 16.8-13. Convince-& show-th.: 114. ^e 121. ⁿ 140.
Joh. 19.30. All is finished by Christ's death.: 124.
Ver. 24. From his side issued water and.: 53. 122. ^p
Acts 2.17.33.38. Spirit poured out.: 90.140.158.
Acts 3. 6. In the Name of Jesus.: 137. 141.
Acts 4. 7. The Name of Jesus is his power.: 137.
Acts 3.25. All kindreds-blessed in Christ.: 97.
Acts 3.26. Acts 5.31. Christ gives.: 92. 96. 75. ^r 80 ^g
Acts 4.29. Grant-that wonders may be done.: 140.
Acts 7.51. Ye have always resisted the Spirit.: 97.
Acts 8. 22. Simon Magus must pray to God.: 95. ^r
Acts 9.34. AEneas, Christ makes thee whole.: 137.
Acts 10.9. Peter going to pray had a vision.: 95. ^d
Acts 11. 28. Agabus foretold a great dearth.: 140.
Acts 17.30. God commands all to repent.: 82.
Acts 20.35. Jesus said, it is more blessed to give.: 91. ^d
Acts 22.10. Arise, go to Damascus (so to Christ): 135.
Acts 25. 15, 16. To have accusers face to face.: 127. ^m
Acts 26. Paul of straitest sect of our religion.: 127.*
Ver. 16. Stand iepon thy feet, to minister.: 135.
ROM. 1. 19, 20. Creation clearly shows a God.: 45. ^a
Rom. 5.8.10. God reconciled us: who were enemi.: 69. ^q
Rom. 5.20. Where sin abounded, grace is exalted.: 145. ⁿ
Rom. 6.14. Not under the Law, but under.: 114. ^l
Rom. 6.17. You-served sin, but now-obeyed.: 74. ^h
Rom. 7.24, 25. O wretch-I thank God through.: 120. ^b
Rom. 8. 3. What the law could not do.: 113.115.
Ver. 10, 11. Spirit that raised Jesus dwells.: 121. ^m
Ver. 17 If suffer with him-glorified together.: 18. ^p
Rom. 8.28. All things work together for good.: 68.
Ver. 35-39. What shall separate, neither.: 122. ^p 134.
Rom. 9.16. Its neither in him that willeth.: 61. ^f
Ver. 25. He calls them his people, that were not.: 72. ^z
Rom. 11.23. He will graff them in, because he is.: 73. ^d
Ver. 34. Who hath been his Counselor?: 61. ^e
Rom. 15 4. What was written, is for our instr.: 104. ⁱ
Rom. 16.20. God will tread Satan.: 50. ^c 73. ^g 149. ^c
1 COR. 1.29.31. That no flesh should glory.: 109. ^g
Ch. 2.11. Things of God none knows, but-Spirit.: 124.
Ch. 6.3. Saints shall judge the world, and Ang.: 145.
1 Cor. 6.17. He that joined to the Lord, is one.: 120. ^e
1 Cor. 10.4. The Rock (Christ) followed.: 46. ^e 76. ^t
Ver. 10. Murmurers were destroyed, yet I saved.: 36. ^e
Ch. 12. 8.31. Covet earnestly the Spirits gifts.: 140.
(1 Cor. 13.1,2.) If I had all gifts, yet wanting.: 83. ^c
2 Cor. 1. 5. Consolations-be comforted us.: 50. ^a
2 Cor. 12.9. His strength appears in weakness.
Ver. 11. Though I am nothing (Christ is all.): 16.18.g
Gal. 1. 15. When God manifested his Son.: 94. ^f
Gal. 2. 20. I am crucified with Christ.: 53. ^g 55. ^l
*Gal. 3. 24, 25. How the Law was School-ma.: 93.*
Gal. 4. 1, 2. Law was a tutor.: 93.*
Gal. 3. 13. Christ redeemed from curse.: 94. ^e
Gal. 5. 6. Faith worketh by love.: 94. ^c
Ephes. 1. 3, 4. We were chosen in Christ bef:creat:: 97.
Ver. 6,7. Riches of glory and grace.: 150.
Ephes. 2. 1-5-12. dead in sins-far off.: 112. ^a 105. ^h
Ver. 10. We are his workmanship.: 103. ^a
Ver. 14. Christ is our peace.: 72. ^c
Ephes. 3.16. Strong with might in inner man.: 142
Ephes. 3. 21. Glory to the age of ages.: 159.
Ephes. 4.2.8. Labor for that which is good.: 109. ^k
Ephes. 5. 14. Arise-Christ shall give thee light.: 74. ^k
Ephes. 5.18. Be not drunk-but filled with-Spirit.: 50.
Ephes. 6. 10. 12. Wrestle in Christ's power.
Phil. 2.7,8. Christ made himself of no reputa.: 117. ^c
Phil. 2.13. Works will and deed in pleasure.: 64. ^r 122. ^e
Phil. 3. 8. Excellency of Jesus Christ.: 16. ^b
Phil. 4.7. Peace of God-rules the heart.: 115.
Ver. 11. I have learned to be content.: 117. ^e 41. ^e
2 Thes, 1. 10. To be admired in his Saints.: 103. ^b
1 Tim. 1.13-15. Save chiefest of sinners.: 18. ^c 79.103. ^c
1 Tim. 4. 10. Saveth all men, specially.: 97.
2 Tim. 1.9. Grace before world was.: 97.
2 Tim. 2.13. He cannot deny himself.: 123.
Titus 2.11. Grace teacheth to deny ungodliness.: 94. ^d
Titus 3. 3. Living in malice, hateful.: 117.
Heb. 2.6. Opens Ps. 8.15.6. to be of Christ.: 42. ^a
Ver. 14. Christ took our nature.: 121. ⁱ
Heb. 6. 18. That fly to Christ for refuge.: 100. ^q
Heb. 8.1-10. New covenant opened.: 123. ⁿ
Heb. 10. 14. He hath perfected forever.: 18. ⁿ
Heb. 11.6. Believe that God is-then come.: 95. ^g
Heb. 12.2. Christ the Author and finisher of.: 79. ^e
Heb. 12.7. Whom he loves, he chastens.: 99. ^l
Heb. 13.8. Christ yesterday, today, and-: 48. ^r 163. ^o
James 2. 11. Do not kill opened.: 38.
1 Pet. 1.25. Word by Gospel preached, opened.: 131. ^y
1 Pet. 2. 9. Turn from darkness to light.: 111. ^q
1 Pet. 5. 8. Satan goes about.: 35. ^b 149.
2 Pet. 1. 19. Till the day-star arise in the heart.: 53. ^c
2 Pet. 3. 1. Stir up-by remembrance.: 94. ^b
1 Joh. 3. 2. We shall see him as he is.: 63. ⁿ
1 Joh. 4.16.19. He loved first, so we love him.: 118. ^k
1 Joh. 5. 6. 8. By water and blood.: 53. ^h 122. ^q
Ver. 7. Three hear witness in Heaven.: 120. ^l
1 Joh. 5.10. Vnbeleever makes God a liar.: 20. ^e 126. ^k
Rev. 2. 17. Eate of hidden Manna.: 39. ⁿ
Rev. 3. 19. Whom I love I chasten.: 98. ^l 99. ^l
Rev. 4. 8. Holy, three, or nine times repeated.: 20. ^o
Rev. 21. 23. 25. Lamb is lasting light.: 35. ^a &c.

THE EXCEEDING RICHES OF GRACE ADVANCED.

THE Relator hereof (being one who desires to fear the Name of the LORD,) having been an eye and ear-witness, both of the sad sufferings, and longed-for- deliverance of this handmaid, M ^ris SARAH WIGHT ; and upon his enquiring at the first and best hand, having many of her precious Evangelical expressions, (as the first fruits thereof, [ viz. from pag. 16, to 35,]) testified to him, by such as are well approved off for godliness and faithfulness ; who were also eye and ear-witnesses with himself of the rest here recorded; And he observing, and noting down presently from time to time, since this happy change, such * Glad-tidings uttered of the Righteousness of God, of his Faithfulness and Salvation, of his * benign Kindnesse and Truth: he could not but Publish it to the World, for the exalting of this glorious Name of of God; and for the refreshing of poor, hungry, empty, sinful, burdened, drooping, despairing souls; that judge none to be so base and hopeless as themselves; and for the building up of others in their holy faith: he would not, might not, durst not keep it to himself alone, and so conceal it, hide it, or withhold it from others; as he would not for all the world, have the Lord withhold, or hide, or * close up his bowels of mercies from his own soul ; as the Psalmist argueth *, Psal. 40. 9, 10, 11. Hebrew.

For the better satisfying of some that would hardly give credit to the wonderful things herein related: It was judged meet, there should be laid down;

1. First somewhat touching this Handmaid, her parentage and dwelling place.
2. Touching her Education. (pag. 5.)
3. Touching her Afflictions in Spirit, especially since she wronged her Conscience, at her being about twelve years old; till April 6. 1647. (she being in September following, 16. years old.) And of godly Ministers, and others, that knew her soul in adversity, and sought to comfort her: and of such as have seen her, and spake with her, since the LORD hath comforted her. ( Pag. 6.8, 9.)
4. Touching the Lord's delivering her, April 6. 1647. when no creature could help, she being then struck deaf, blind, and lame ; and terrified beyond measure: this extremity was the Lord's opportunity. (pag. 14, 15.)

Then, 1. of her so continuing deaf and blind, from April 6, till April 19. many days together; (except part of April 15. wherein she had satisfaction to her troubled Spirit, that her Mother had pardoned her murmurings against her: And part of April 17, to see and hear her Brother ; as Pag. 25. & 29.)

2. Of her being acted, both then, and often after, to admire, utter forth, and magnify the exceeding Riches of God's Grace to sinners, to her the chief of sinners. Her speeches of Grace, which follow, were all in her Bed, being in the time of her bodies great weakness; caused partly through her former deep sense of God's wrath, consuming and pining away ; And by seeking to beat out her eyes, and Brains; and since this happy change, her stomach being exceeding weak ; not eating at all till June 11, and drinking so little, as is noted; her voice thus being very low, and oft whispering, (it could be heard by none, but that were very near her;) uttered in an humble, melting manner; stopped sometimes with tears of sighs ; her eyes being always covered, because of that weakness, and by spending her self in speaking to distressed souls, and to others.

3. Of her Conferences then and since; with many despairing souls: whose Names, and dwelling places are so born by the Relator, in tender respect to themselves, and their friends: least some not experienced in Temptations, might the more reproach them, or the Name of God, for what these uttered in distress, or through Temptation. But their Expressions, and the Answers to them are recorded as near as could be, being then writ down, for help to themselves hereafter, and to others in like condition, if the Lord will: Hoping this will not offend them.

2. Conferences with others about the Church-Ordinances, the Spirits pouring forth ; about the New Covenant, the Law, Works, Mans Endeavors, Punishment for sin, Redemption, &c.

4. Of the Lord's power in sustaining her, above 75 days, by a little water taken once in three or four or five days, and very little besides: [And then raising her by FAITH.]

All these are here set down, though the latter are set down occasionally, and not all in this same order.

I. TOuching her Earthly Parentage. This M ^ris Sarah Wight, was daughter to M ^r Thomas Wight, sometimes of the Auditors Office, and of the Exchequers Office: (Son to old M ^r Wight of Daintry. ) Her earthly dwelling is now with her faithful Mother M ^ris Mary Wight, widow, in Lawrence Pountney. Lane, by Caning-street in LONDON: Whose Father was M ^r Edward Purcel Esquire, of Ansloo near Shrewsbury: and whose former Husband was M ^r Edward Vaughan Esquire, the Kings Receiver, and Surveyor for Northampton-shire, and for Rutland-shire: (by whom, she had her Son M ^r Jonathan Vaughan, now of Alsoules in Oxford: Who not long since writ thence a Consolatory Letter to this his sorrowful Sister SARAH, therein saying thus: [ Doest thou despair, because thy Temper is a Lyon for his strength? Behold the Lyon of the Tribe of Judah, Christ the mighty God: who can and will deliver thee out of his paw.—A fountain laid open for sin, and for uncleanness. I verily believe, that although for the present you lie among the pots, of no use: yet thy God will make thee a Vessel of Honor, an instrument fit for thy Masters use; whereby he will square sinners, to his own glory, &c.] Thin in his Letter is now fulfilled, and fulfilling.) She that was born of flesh and blood, borne in sin ; and that was by Nature a child of wrath: is now borne from above, borne of God, having given to her Faith and Love: and hath Jesus Christ to her Brother ; and God to her Father, and her dwelling place; He dwelling in her, and she in him. Let him and her that glorieth, not glory in the flesh, but in the Lord alone.

II. Touching her Education: In the time of her Mothers deep afflictions of Spirit, and sore Temptations, she was well trained up in the Scriptures, by her godly faithful Grand-mother, M ^ris Wight of Daintree. And when the Lord's time of Love was, that he vouchsafed to manifest his Grace in Christ to her Mothers soul, then the Lord brought her home to her, she being then about nine years old. She gave her self much to read and study the Scriptures: Which though she then understood not aright; yet the Lord by his Holy Spirit brought to her remembrance, and opened to her since her restoring, what formerly she had read for great comfort and soul-refreshing to her self, and to many others; as hereafter followeth. (Which is a great encouragement to all that fear God, to train up there children in the holy Scriptures; as, 2 Tim. 3. 15. Chap. 1.5. Prov. 22. 6. Deut. 6. 6, 7. Gen. 18. 19.)

III. Touching her afflictions. From her childhood she was of a tender heart, and oft afflicted in Spirit: Her Temptations were not so great, till she was about twelve years old; since which, they have continued with more violence till April 6. 1647. it being about four years. [She is not sixteen years old (as her Mother saith,) till September following.]

The beginning of her more violent Temptations was thus: Her superior bid her do a small thing, judging it meet and lawful: She did it, doubtingly, fearing it was unlawful: and as she did it, a great Trembling in her hands and body fell upon her: being condemned in her self. About a month after, returning home, having been abroad, she had lost her hood, and knew she had lost it. Her Mother asked her, for her hood. She suddenly answered, My Grand-mother hath it. Her heart condemned her instantly, and trembled again exceedingly. And these were the first chief occasions of her deep despair: And upon this, she had cast into her Conscience, that she was both a thief, and a liar, and was terrified ever since, that she was shut out of Heaven, and must be damned, damned, damned.

In the last four years, she was oft in such extremities, she could believe nothing but Hell and Wrath—to be her Portion; and other times, that there was no heaven; nor no hell, but in our Conscience: and that she was damned already, being an unbeliever: and therefore if she could but dispatch this life of hers, there was an end of her sorrows. A subtle deceit of the old Serpent! Hence she oft attempted wickedly to destroy her self; as by drowning, strangling, stabbing ; seeking to beat out her eyes and brains ; wretchedly bruising, and wounding her self: (The chief cause of such weakness since:) Many particulars whereof follow, in her own Relations.

But the Lord who is her life, and loved her then in her blood, he wonderfully prevented her destruction, many ways. Sometimes by one or other at that instant; sometimes staying her in the acting, when no creature was by: Sometimes by bringing to her mind some choice Scripture: as this, No weapon formed against thee, shall prosper, ( Isa. 54.17.) or this, None shall take them out of my hand ; or, out of my Fathers hand, ( John. 10.28, 29.) This stopped her sinful act, but the comfort stayed not.

Many precious Ministers came to comfort her: In London these, M ^r Thomas Goodwin, M ^r Barker, M ^r Lockyar, M ^r Palmer (lately their Minister in Lawrence Pountney ) M ^r Sprigge, M ^r John Simpson, and others. And these came to her in or near Shrewsbury, M ^r Hildersham of Felton, M ^r Paget (Father of D ^r Paget now of London ) M ^r Wright of Wellington, M ^r Smith, M ^r Fisher, M ^r Blake, M ^r Morgan Floyd, M ^r Moston : All these and many moe godly Ministers and precious Christians, being acquainted with her sad condition, endeavored to comfort her: and she gladly would have received comfort; but it was then hid from her.

Some glimpse she had, especially by means of her kinsman, M ^r John Brown, of Shrewbury (a faithful and loving man,) and by one whom he brought with him, viz. M ^r Daniel Floyd: but it was soon eclipsed again; and she remained in grievous horror day and night; concluding she was a Cast-away, a Reprobate, walking daily in the midst of fire and brimstone, as one in Hell already. Till the Lord (who had loved her with an everlasting love, and in loving kindness prevented her ruin,) at last restored comforts to her, and to those that had prayed and mourned for her. (Isa. 57. 18.)

And since that her much prayed-and hoped-for- deliverance, amongst many that have visited her, were these Ministers ; M ^r Palmer, M ^r Sprigge, and M ^r Simpson beforesaid, M ^r Peters, M ^r Charnock of London, M ^r Atherley of the Charterhouse (with his wife,) M ^r Hide of Wighton in Yorkshire, and the Relator. Also the Lady Willoughby of Parham ; the Lady Renula, and the Lady Clotworthy her sister; the Lady Vermuiden, with her daughters, M ^ris Sarah, and M ^ris Katharine ; Sir Ric: Philip's, and his Lady, daugh: to D ^r Oxenbridge ; Sir Rich: Saltonstall, with his Lady: & Capt. Price, with his wife; D ^r Coxe, D ^r Debote, D ^r Worsley, D ^r Paget, Physicians. Also M ^ris Fines, wife to my Lord Says eldest Son; and M ^ris Harrison, wife to the Chamberlain of London ; Col. Langhams wife, daughter to the Lady Roberts ; M ^ris Sarah Jones, wife to M ^r Tho. Jones Esquire of Tower -hill; M ^ris Berney of Norsolk: M ^r and M ^ris Liggon, M ^ris Wilson at Nags -head-Tavern; M ^ris Thorp, at Grave Maurice ; M ^r P. Bourbon, and his wife; M ^ris Owen, and M ^ris Hannah Allen, Booksellers; M ^ris Manning of Tower -street, M ^ris Elizabeth Waldo, sister to M ^r John Pocock ; M ^r Ellis and M ^ris Ellis, M ^ris Hawkins, M ^ris Flood, and M ^ris There, and her cousins, M ^r Brigs Taylor and his wife, all near London-stone: and of their nearer neighbors, M ^r Louis Merchant, M ^ris Palmer, M ^ris Thurrel, M ^ris Grace Philip's, M ^ris Dupper, M ^ris Aires, &c. Besides her Brother M ^r Jonathan Vaughan, of Alsoules in Oxford ; & her uncle M ^r James Wight of Southwark, and his wife; and other two Ants, M ^ris Anne & M ^ris Mary Wight. Many moe might be named, who have seen her of late, & have been much affected in hearing of the Lord's wonderful workings, in, and towards her: But these are sufficient to witness what they have seen, or heard, and believe: many of them being persons of note, and of much esteem in London amongst them that fear the Lord. The Naming of them, the Relator desires may not be offensive to any of them, seeing 'tis done for the more assuring this great and memorable work of God's mercy, to some, that (like Thomas ) will not believe it, unless (at least) they may speak with some, that have been present with her.

About a month before her great deliverance, Satan having but a short time so to torment her, her storms and tempests were greatest of all. She was grievously hurried with Temptations; so terrified, she could not rest at all, for many days and nights together. Whilst she was able to go abroad, her Mother would have her go with her to hear Sermons, on the Lord's days, and on the Lecture -days there. One Lecture -day she was gone forth before her Mother; who missing her, went to the Assembly; and not finding her there, came forth; and sudddenly went, and sent towards Thames to seek her: where she had been, to have cast her self in, but was stayed from it by the power and goodness of God: and being found, she had a command on her spirit to go to hear that Sermon, and her Mother coming to her, she readily yielded to go with her Mother to the Lecture there. Wherein was proved, what great favor God will show towards the stock of the Jews ; that he will grass multitudes of them into their own Olive, pardoning their sins against Christ, restoring them to great dignity, &c. He that preached, went in to M ^ris Wights house there, after the Sermon; and spake with her daughter, asking her, if the Lord spake any peace to her thereby. She answered, she would not for all the world, but she had heard that Sermon. Being asked, why so? She said, That God will show mercy to the Jews; and they are the basest people on earth ; that so hate the very name of Christians, and much more Christ himself: and yet that God will call them ; This supported her a little at that present; but it stayed not with her, and she was again under horrid Temptations, to believe there was no God, no Devil, no Heaven, and no Hell, but what she felt within her.

One day being strongly carried on in that temptation, that there was no other Hell, but here in the conscience ; As that famous M ^ris Hanywood had said and done with a Venice Glass, (who said she was as sure to be damned, as that was to break ; and therewith threw it from her to break it; & yet it brake not;) so did she with her little white drinking cup, an earthen cup; she said, As sure as this cup shall break, there is no other Hell: and therewith she threw the cup with violence, against the far side of the chamber; and though it light against the wood, it brake not. Her mother took it up, & said, Loe here child, it is not breke. She got it again, and suddenly said so, & did with it so again, & again; and once against the edge of the door. Thus she struggled, and did four or five times, and yet it brake not; but at the fifth time, a little nip brake out. And now since the Lord hath created peace to her, she hath desired to drink still out of that her little cup: till their Water-bearer unawares cast it down, and then it brake all to pieces.

In her despairing fits, she several times would turn to the places in Job, & in Jeremiah, where they cursed the day of their birth ; and she said to this effect; Job cursed the day wherein he was borne, and said, Wherefore hast thou brought me forth of the womb? Oh, that I had given up the ghost, and no eye had seen me. She turning to the places, Job 3.3. Job 10. 18. And ( Ier. 20. 14. to the end) Jeremiah cursed the man that brought tidings of his birth, with bitter curses, because his mothers womb was not his grave, and said, Wherefore came I out of the womb, to see toile and sorrow, that my days should be consumed with shame? But she said, Have not I much more cause to say so, then they had? for they were in a blessed condition: but I am cursed, and must be a fire-brand of Hell forever.

These and many other desperate expressions, she frequently used; especially in the last month of her sorrows. When they increased daily, so that her soul was exceedingly troubled, and she was, as it were all shattered to pieces. And she was so weary of her life, and of her self, and of everything, she was never at such a pass, in such extremity, in all her life before.

Her tender and good Mother, attending on her continually day and night, to prevent her mischieving her self; being still upheld with great hopes, that the Lord in his good time, would come in to her with his consolations; yea, she was verily persuaded so, (as was also her Brother in Oxford ;) And this made her sore task the more easy; which else had been intolerable. Yet when this extremity had continued long, so that for many days and nights together, her mother had taken no rest. At last she was even wearied out with continual watchings; and to the end herself might enjoy some rest, to prevent harm to her self, she had spoke to a friend, desiring that her daughter might be for a little season with her; which her friend was very willing unto; and her daughter was desirous to go with her, that her Mother might enjoy rest. But the Lord prevented both in his goodness. For when her friend was come, her daughter was taken with such an exceeding trembling, and such extremity of sorrow and trouble and weakness, that she was not able to go with her. A forerunner of her deliverance.

Then her Mother procured a maid that feared God, to help to look to her, who came that same day of her so trembling, being Tuesday April 6. When the maid beforesaid came to her, she found her weeping most bitterly, & wringing her hands grievously, saying, I am a Reprobate, a Castaway, I never had a good thought in all my life. I have been under sin ever since I can remember, when I was but a child, &c.

This heaviness was greatest, this night was darkest of all, when the day, the joyful time of her deliverance was near at hand. And like as at the beginning of her grievous despairing, about four years before, upon those two sins beforesaid, a great trembling fell upon her at the beginning of her deep despair and trouble: so now, at the ending thereof, the like trembling fell upon her; such as she never had, at any other time. And now, thus trembling exceedingly, and weeping and wringing her hands; she said to this effect: My earthly Tabernacle is broken all to pieces; and what will the Lord do with me? If I should hang on Gibbets, if I should be cut in pieces, if I should die the cruellest death that ever any did, I have deserved it; I would still justify God: aye if he cast me to hell. (Thus it was with patient Job; He humbled himself, and justified the Lord, when his restoring was at hand.) Her hands and her feet were clunched, so as she could not stand. She was tempted and sore urged to blaspheme God and die. And when she was ready to speak, her tongue was smitten. Afterward she being laid down, she said to her Mother, I will lie still, and hear what God will say to me: He will speak Peace, Peace. If God will speak a word of Peace at the last moment, I should be contented. Then she desired them that none might trouble her, but that she might lie in peace. And she lay still, as in a sleep, (or as in a trance rather,) from that tuesday night, April 6. till the last day of that week (called Saturday ) at night; except when she called for a little water to drink, and drunk two or three cups of water. No other sustenance she took all that time. And this was the time of love ; when The Exceeding Riches of Grace was advanced.

April 10. 1647. that Saturday at night, about midnight, or after midnight, she began to express the first expressions of comforts, of such soul-satisfying comforts, that ever she so manifested: [though her soul enjoyd them from that Tuesday night before; as since her Trances ceased, she hath declared.] Even now, when all man's help faild, and when all means before used could not do it; and when now she was made uncapable that way to receive it, being now struck both blind, and deaf: her eyes being fast closed up, wrapped up together: [A. Saul (who is called Paul ) when the Lord converted him, was three days without sight, and neither did eat, nor drink, Act. 9. 9.] And thus she began: My soul thirsts for the water of life, and I shall have it: My soul thirsts for the water of life, and I shall have it, (four times in ardency of spirit uttering those words, then adding) a little water good people, a little water. So she drank two or three of her little cups of water. Then she sat up, and with a most sweet and heavenly countenance, and with much brokenness of heart, in an humble melting manner, Tears sometimes trickling down, she spake with a low voice, as followeth.

Ah, that Jesus Christ, should come from the bosom of his Father, and take the nature of man upon him! and come in such a low estate; and lie in a Manger ! There's three sorts of people in the world; a higher sort, and a middle sort, and a lower sort: Christ came to the lowest soul; he lay in a Manger; a contemptible place. Do you not see an excellency in him ? Do you not see an excellency in him? I tell you, there's more excellency in him, in his lowest state, his meanest state, then in the world; aye, then in a thousand worlds. Who came he to die for? for sinners; aye for the greatest sinners, the chiefest sinners, the chiefest sinners ? A dying Christ for a denying Peter; a dying Christ, for a denying Peter; a dying Christ, for a denying Peter. Peter denied him, and yet he died for him . Go tell Peter! Go tell Peter ! Ah Peter! And then she paused a while, as admiring it: and proceeded thus: For a Peter! for a Mary Magdalene! for a Thief on the Cross! that none should despair: a crucified Christ, for a crucified Thief! a crucified Christ, for a crucified Thief! A persecuting Saul, becomes a beloved Paul! for the chiefest sinners! the chiefest sinners! Not the proud Pharisee, but the poor Publican . No sin separates from Christ, but the sin of Unbelief. And this is the Faith, believing a full Christ, to a nothing Creature: a full Christ, to a nothing Creatures: a full Christ, to a nothing Creature : To me, the chiefest of sinners: yet I obtained mercy through unbelief: Christ came not to find faith, but to give faith: Christ came in to me, when I was in my unbelief. (Then she said pausing.) There's a fountain open, for Judah, and for Jerusalem; for sin, and for uncleanness. A fountain open, for Judah, and for Jerusalem, for sin, and for uncleanness . A fountain, not streams, but a fountain: open, an open fountain: if a door stand shelving, you cannot come in, but you must thrust to come in: but if it stand wide open, then there's freedom for you to go, freedom for you to go. Its open for Judah; Judah that played the Harlot, yet God saith to Judah, Return, though thou hast played the Harlot with many lovers, return, for I am married to thee . For Judah, and for Jerusalem: and what was Jerusalem? her skirts were fu'l of blood, her streets were full of blood . Yet the fountain is open for Judah, and for Jerusalem. For sin, and for uncleanness: for all sin, for the greatest sin, the chiefest sin and sinners. Who is this fountain? Jesus Christ, he is this fountain : a filling fountain, and never dry ; a filling fountain, and never dry; a filling fountain, and never dry. Who is a God like to thee? pardoning sin , all sin, sin past, present, and to come : not only pardoning sin, but passing by the transgression of his heritage. Passing by daily sins, and frailites: he retains not his anger forever; He is slow to wrath; bist he delights in mercy: He is slow to nothing but to wrath; but he is swift to mercy. His wrath is but a little, in a little wrath: and what's that? but with everlasting kindness will he show mercy . His mercy, and his kindness is forever, forever. Christ was first crucified, before he was glorified . Before yot receive a Christ glorified, you must receive a Christ crucified. [Thus the Lord opened her mouth to speak, much of it in the words of the holy Scriptures, April 10 or 11. and so also April 13, and 15, and 17. April 19, 20. 25. &c. as hereafter followeth; though she remained deaf and blind til April 19, from April 6: except part of April 15. and 17. ( the Wonder followeth ) nor could she see to read by reason of the weakness of her eyes, til about the midst of May, nor well then, til June 11. But as our Lord Jesus promised to his Disciples, that his Spirit should teach them all things, and should bring to their remembrance what he had said unto them, (Joh. 14. 26.) So now he thus far graciously performed it to her. She neither cited Chapter, nor Verse now; nor usually afterward. Her own words being writ down by the Relator first, he then added (in a Parenthesis) such places of Scripture as were suitable to them, for better satisfaction to many: the letter , , , &c. with the proofs, are suitable to her own words preceding, where the like letter is.]

Those her gracious expressions beforesaid, (and moe to the like effect) she uttered after midnight, April 10 or 11. and then ceased, and lay down: and continued silent from April 10. till the 13 ^th , being Tuesday at night following, neither speaking, nor eating, nor drinking anything in the mean while.

When her Mother had moved her to take somewhat, laying her hand upon hers, (for she heard not what was said to her;) she spake as one troubled at it, and said, Why do you hinder my Communion with God. And remained troubled, sighing about it, for some time after: which caused a forbearing to urge her therein.

Tuesday -night April 13. first having started suddenly, she said: The Devil fights with me, as he did with Michael, and his Angels . Do you not see him? Do you not see him? [and she struck with the back of her hand from her; and thus proceeded;] But the Angel shall prevail, the Lyon of the Tribe of Judah, hath overcome him. The Accuser of the Brethren is cast out: The Accuser of the Brethren is cast out: The Accuser of the Brethren is cast out . Jesus Christ came to destroy the works of the Devil . He took our nature upon him, that he might be partaker of our sufferings . [Then she added] Come Lord Jesus; Come Lord Jesus : But why say I, Come? He is come, he is come, he is come: He hath dispossessed the strong man , and hath taken possession of my soul, and will dwell with me, forever, forever, forever. How near are the Saints to Christ? They are his Jewels : Nay, they are his signet on his right hand: Nay, they are his seal on his heart : they lie in his bosom. When you take a thing out of a man's bosom, you cannot take it, but you must touch the man: (clapping her hand on her breast.) That that I admire most is, that Christ took our nature, he took our nature. Men and Angels admire it: aye and Devils too, if they can. When the Lord doth any great thing, he puts his I to it: I, even I am he . I will make a New Covenant : I will write my Law in their heart: I will pardon your sins: I will do them away as a thick cloud . I change not, therefore are you not consumed . Ah, what a foolish creature am I? I could not endure to hear one speak of the Devil, and I was as bad as he , in distrusting of God, that died for me. Oh, that the world knew Jesus Christ ! Sure they would not distrust him, they would not despite him, they would not persecute him. Christ taught Simon how to bear the Cross: he bare it first himself. I was found of them that sought me not, and to the Nation that looked not after me, I said; Behold me, Behold me . Then speaking somewhat louder, she said; Love him, Love him, &c. These words she repeated nine or ten times, in ardency of affection. ( Prov. 8. 17. 21.) Then she desired a little water to drink, [she never having loved strong drink, nor wine, nor strong water, since she was borne: of late small beer, or water was her usual drink: but now, since Saturday the 27 ^th of March 1647. (when she took a little broth) till this day of the writing of part hereof, being May 19. These 53. days together, she hath taken no outward sustenance at all, but only two or three or four cups of fair water at a time, and once of 〈◊◊〉 a little broth, (and casting it up again, unable to keep it,) and taking this also only once in two days, or in three days or more, between the times of her taking thereof, never taking it two days together: And yet she looks better now, then she did seven or eight weeks ago.] Desiring water, she said, Give me a little water good people; Christ hath given you water freely. Then she drank her little white cup full once, and again: and said, I pray you give me some more: Jesus Christ when he turned water into wine, be turned not cups full, or glasses full; but sirkins sull . If you give a cup of cold water as to a Disciple, you shall not loose your reward . Then she drank two cups more: and proceeded thus in the same tender-hearted manner. As I live saith the Lord, I will not the death of a sinner. He hath sworn it; he hath sworn it, that he delights not in the death of a sinner . He hath said, I will never leave thee, no, I will never forsake thee, no . [Thus she added the Emphasis, No ; that is more in the Greek, then in our Translation: though she be no Grecian:] and then added: What am I? a poor, empty, disconsolate, sinful, vain, contemptible worm: a poor, wretched, empty, unthankful, sinful, vile, contemptible worm, to tread upon. Yet hath Jesus Christ loved me. That, that I admire most, is, that Jesus Christ should die for such a one .

Then being sensible of her bodily ilnesse, having kept her bed since April 6. She said: I am sore from the crown of the head, to the foot; but tis nothing, tis nothing. When Jesus Christ was in the world, he cured bodies, and not bodies only, but souls too.

Then turning her self in the bed, she said: Now I have my desire; I desired nothing but a crucified Christ, and I have him. I desired nothing but a crucified Christ, and I have him; a crucified Christ, a naked Christ; I have him, and nothing else. I am sore all over; I can neither hear, nor see; I desired him so, and I have him so, and I have nothing else. And said, We should be as well content to bear he cross of Christ, as the crown . For he was made perfect by suffering , and he had no sin: it was for us Therefore we should be contented to bear the Cross

Hah, Had I known this, I would not have been in such a condition as I was, (meaning it seems, in murmuring, and not waiting patiently the Lord's time:) But God's time is the best time, to reveal himself, and to open mine eyes to see, and mine ears to hear; and he gives power to wait.

Was I afraid to name the Devil? Nothing but free Grace, makes the difference between me and the Devil. All's free, mercy free, and goodness free, and love free. The Lord proclaimed his own Name, he called himself, Gracious, Merciful, Long-suffering .

Ah, how sick am I at the heart! what a stitch I have. Soon after she said; I thank you for giving me the water, Jesus Christ hath given you water. He hath given you, and he will give you more.

She said also; God hath two thrones: one is in the highest Heavens; the other is in the lowest hearts. He dwells as truly in the lowest hearts, as in the highest Heavens; in the poorest contemptible heart . When Solomon built a Temple, he said; The Heavens of Heavens cannot contain thee: and how shall this house that I have built ? But God builds a house for himself to dwell in: and he dwells in it, forever, forever, forever. Do not you know, that God hath two Thrones? The highest Heavens, and the lowest hearts! Happy is that people that is in such a case, whose God is the Lord, whose joy is their strength . And so saying, she smiled, her eyes being still fast closed. So she lay still, and was not heard to speak anymore, from that Tuesday till Thursday following.

Thursday, April 15. 1647.

This day, about 7 of the clock in the morning, she began thus: Daniel in the Lions den; the three children in the fiery farnace ; the Lord delivered them, and so he doth me. Then calling for water to drink, she said again, (as formerly,) Christ hath given you water to drink freely: give me water freely: so she drank three or four times her little cup full of water. And she still remaining deaf, and with her eyes fast closed up, she said; Have not I a Mother some where? I pray you pray her to pardon me, the murmurings against her. For nothing else troubles me. God hath pardoned. Hath the Creator pardoned, and shall not the Creature? Thus speaking, the tears ran fast down her checks for a great while: and she said; When the prodigal came home, his earthly father pardoned him , and his heavenly Father pardoned him. And will not my Mother pardon me? If she should, its not that, will do me good. If she will not, it lies heavy upon me. But God hath pardoned me.

[Another time, when many were present, she said thus, with tears trickling down; If any did know, what it is to murmur against a God, and against a Parent, and felt for it what I have felt; they would never do it. Nothing more burdens me, then my murmurings and disobedience against my Mother. This she spake, weeping. [What a warning is this to all children, that have murmured or been disobedient against father or mother, to repent in time, and seek pardon, and mercy for help against it; least it be as heavy a burden to them, when they are in trouble, as it hath been to this hand-maid, (and to divers others,) Yet she said, her disobedience was not willful, but she was hurried to it, in the violence of temptation. ]

Then she desired her mother might come to her, to testify that she had pardoned her: yet could she then neither hear nor see: but said, I know a Jacob from an Esau. Her mother came to her, and took her daughters hand, and put it to her own neck, where her daughter felt a skare that was there, through the enemy: whereby her daughter knowing her, cast her head into her mothers bosom, and wept greatly, and kissed her, and stroked her face, and said, I know you mother; and I love you with another love then I loved you before.

Then she asked for water, to wash her EYES, desiring she might now see her Mother also, and that she might hear her mother speak, and tell her, that she had pardoned her disobedience. And water being brought, her eyes were washed: and they being still fast folded up, M ^ris Dupper her neighbor in Lawrence Pountney -lane, held open her eyes, and she saw and knew her mother: and then immediately her EARES also were opened, that she might hear her mother speak to her, and she testified to her, that she had pardoned her, and loved her as her own soul. And then, her heart was at rest, she was satisfied: Her bearing then continued about half an hour, viz. till she ceased then to speak, and then it was again taken from her; and her eyes were presently closed up again. In this time of her hearing, her mother told her, that her Brother was come, viz. M ^r Jonathan Vaughan ; (her mothers son by her former husband;) [ Who being then a Student of Alsoules College in Oxford, having remained there several years; was now come to London, to see his Mother, and Sister, and other friends, and was to return thither again shortly. From thence he had lately writ a Consolatory Letter to his Sister, expressing his confidence, that Jesus Christ, the Lyon of the Tribe of Judah, both could, and would deliver her, &c. Of which, her Mother also was persuaded, and waited for: by which the Lord the more enabled her to bear this sad affliction, that bad so long continued. ]

She was glad to hear of her Brother, that had mourned and prayed for her, that he was now come at such a time: and she desired to see and hear him; But at that time, he was abroad. And before he came, she had ceased speaking, and then remained without speaking, or drinking, & without sight or hearing, these being again taken from her from that 15. til the 17 ^th of April. On the same 15. day, she asked if her Brother, or the maid would go to M ^r Simpson, to desire him to come to her. When he came, she had done speaking; and seemed to be in a trance, and would not speak again, till her time came.

On the same 15 ^th day, before she ceased, she further said: I thought I was the bad thief; but now I see, I am as the good thief. I was really crucified with Christ ; though I was not in the appearance of any bodily eye, but as I was in the loins of Adam when he sinned . I was the nails in his hands and in his feet; and the spear in his side . The maid desired her to eat something: she answered, I cannot; I am full.

Again, she said; How old am I? [Her Mother saith, she shall be sixteen year old in September next, 1647. She went on in her speech thus.] Thirteen, fourteen, fifteen, sixteen: so long I have been a filthy sinner. Now I have been four days in the grave, with Lazarus : (she having been four years in deep despair:) and now I am risen , to live with Jesus Christ, forever, in glory. He led Captivitie Captive, and received gifts for men; even for the Rebellions . He came to the poor Publican, that could but speak one word: not to the proud Pharisee, that used many words . Jesus Christ said, The Cup that my heavenly Father gives me to drink, shall I not drink it ? He drank the dregs, the very dregs; and he had no sin; and shall the Saints think much to sip of the Cup, when he drank of it before us? The yoke of Christ is easy, and his burden is light; but the yoke of sin is heavy, and wrath is heavy. The yoke of Christ is easy, because Christ helps them to hear it himself, and that makes it easy, The Saints showed have no sufferings, if it were not for their good ; else they should have no sufferings at all.

Christ comes leaping over the mountains, and skipping over the hills! There's nothing in the soul, but mountains of sin, and hills of corruption: he doth not come running, nor walking, but leaping and skipping, to a poor bewildered soul: not to a garden ready trimmed he trims it for himself, to abide in, forever, forever. If we confess our sins, he's faithful and just to forgive us . One confession, and two things to that, Faithful and just. He'l give water of life to them that thirst . Not only water, but water of life. He hides himself, that we may seek the more earnestly after him , and that he may reveal himself more fully. I that was an enemy, am made an heir with Christ, to live in glory, forever, forever. Christ is my Brother, my elder Brother .

How sweet are the Teachings of the Spirit to my soul! Sweeter then the Teachings of men and Angels: They may speak much to the ear, and that's well: but they could not say to my soul, Thy sins are pardoned, and Christ Jesus loves thee.

These and moe heavenly expressions she uttered in a humble gracious manner that same 15 ^th day. The relating of them thus brokenly, cannot so affect the heart, as to have heard her self so tender-heartedly speak them. For this half hour or more of her now speaking, the Lord restored her hearing, wherein she both saw and heard her Mother, as two days following she saw and heard her Brother also, whom she longed to see and hear, and was satisfied. And having thus spoken what she desired then to say, she ceased, and rested. And then both her sight, and her hearing were again taken from her. She abiding as asleep, but it seems slept little, but in that resting time, much enjoying communion with Jesus Christ, her souls rest. So was she silent from that morning April 15. till the morning of the 17 ^th day. The night following April 16. she was very sick laboring for breath, as if she would have died.

April 17. being the last day in the week in the morning, she asked for water. A little being given her to drink, she said; Give me it freely: Christ hath given me Faith freely, and love freely, and joy in himself. And having drunk again, she proceeded thus.

We love him, because he loved us first : We rejoice in him, because he rejoiced in us first: We desire him, because he desired us first. I could not believe that I should be saved: but now, if men and Devils stood there, before my eyes, and should tell me, I should not be saved; I would not believe them. I see him that's invisible; and look on him, whom I have pierced, and I mourn over him. Do not you love him? if you see him, as I see him, you would admire him. A sight of him would satisfy Nations. A sparkle of him, is more glorious then the world .

This day she asked again for M ^r Simpson, & for M ^r Iessey. She answered her self, thus; I cannot hear, and why do I ask a Question. After this, she remembering her Mother had told her that her Brother was come, she spake of her Joseph, [for so she called him,] and now she was desirous to see him. And said;

Mine eyes have seen my heavenly Joseph, and why shall I not see my earthly Joseph? The Lord hath opened my spiritual eyes, and why should I not believe, that he will open my bodily eyes?

And she called for water to wash her eyes: and having washed her eyes, her brother being present by her, she saw him, and took him by the hand, and pulled him, and told him of the greatness of the love of Christ, saying, Why came he from the bosom of the Father; but to die for sinners? the chief of sinners: and that makes the Grace great.

She then told him, what condition she had been in, thus (in a sweet humble manner;) I was at the very brink of Hell; and Jesus Christ pulled me out. And how can I but love him? He came for the disobedient, and unholy, and unthankful: and for murmurers, as I have been . If any one see and feel what I have seen and felt, they would take heed of murmuring against God and a Parent. You never murmured so much against God, and against my Mother, as I have done; Ah, ah, ah, sighing and weeping as she spake. But I speak the rather, (said she) that none should despair: because I have found mercy .

I am not able to express how sweet that word is; Behold, O daughter of Jerusalem, thy King, Hab, (smiling at that word,) thy King cometh, meek, meek, cometh meek; riding on an Ass ; even on a Colt the foal of an Ass : not on a horse ready trimmed: He comes to a wild Asses colt; to one unaccustomed to the yoke, as Ephraim was . Yet Ephraim was a dear son, a pleasant child. They cast their cloths on the Ass: He cast his skirt over me: not a skanty skirt: a skirt that covered all my filthiness. My beloved is mine, and I am my beloveds. As an Apple tree is among the Trees of the wood, so is my beloved among the sons . What a pleasant thing is an Apple tree, among the Trees of the wood? There's both Protection, and Provision: there's Protection from the beat, under his shadow: and his fruit was sweet to me; there's Provision. Christ is protection, a shelter: a shelter from the storm . Christ keeps his Church himself. Men put others in their Garrisons: but Christ keeps his Church, his own self . I that was a far off, far off from peace, am made nigh, by the blood of the Cross .

Her brother spake aloud to her, to take somewhat to refresh her body. She then heard him, and answered, I cannot; I have what I did desire; I have a crucified Christ: I am so full of the Creator, that I now can take in none of the Creature. I am filled with heavenly Manna : I am sore from the crown of the head, to the sole of the foot. But let the Lord do what be will with me: let him take me to his eternal rest, I am content: or leave me in this veil of misery, I am content . Thou art a free agent: Thou workest when thou wilt, and where thou wilt.

She said moreover: Let the Lord do with me what he will: if he throws me into hell, I will be contented; because I have deserved it . But his mercy will save me in the day of wrath .

There's no sin separates the soul from Christ, but the sin of Unbelief . And this is all the Faith I look after, believing a full Christ, to a nothing Creature: a full Christ to a nothing Creature . Nothing makes a difference between me, and the Devil, but free Grace, free Grace . He hath not forgot to be gracious: he hath not forgot to be merciful, though I often said, he had: He hath not forgotten to be gracious, though I said, he had . She prayed for her beloved Joseph, her brother, to this effect. Blessed be Joseph of the Lord. The good will of him that dwelt in the bush, be on the head of Joseph, and on the top of the head of him, that was separated from his Brethren .

She asked for the same persons that she had named before; and said; They have sought the Lord for me, desire them to praise and magnify the Lord with me. When these came, she had ceased speaking, and then she lay still without speaking, or drinking, till the 19 ^th day: having not eaten anything at all since the 27 ^th of March, nor drunk anything at all, but two or three of her little cups of fair water, and that only at once in two or three days, as is beforesaid.

April 19. She put her finger to her mouth, desiring water. And one cup was given her; then she began, thus: God is a refuge and a shield, from the storms and tempests: He hath avenged me on my adversary, (meaning, the Devil,) that thought to be avenged on me: and I thought he would: but the Lord hath avenged me on him. Shall the unrighteous Judge do justly, [meaning, in avenging the widow on her adversary:] and shall not the righteous Judge do justly? Yea a thousand times more . Happy, happy, happy is the people that have the God of Jacob for their Excellency, and whose strength is in the Lord . Behold, the Lord will come with a strong band: He shall feed the flock like a Shepherd: He shall carry his Lambs in his arm . I have born thee from the belly, which have carried thee from the womb, even to thy old age: I am he: and even to hoary hairs will I carry thee, I will wait on him, that hides himself from the house of Jacob . He hides himself from the House of Jacob: yet they were his people. Thou art worth the waiting for, if one should wait from the day of their birth, to the very day of their death: even one glimpse of thee is worth all. He that walks in darkness, and seeth no light, let him trust on the Name of the Lord, and stay himself upon his God: his God, though he be in darkness, stay on his God. [Isa. 50 10.]

Bodily sustenance being offered to her, she not having eaten anything at all during twenty-four days last past, nor drunk anything at all but fair water, and but very little of that. She thus answered: Do you think, I do not eat? How do you think I live? Being asked, what she did eat? She said; No eye of man sees it, but the eye of God. None could taste the sweetness of the Manna, by looking on it, none but they that eat of it: or of the Honey out of the Rock. The redeemed of the Lord, are a Royal Priesthood, a chosen Generation. He hath made us Kings and Priests unto God, (1 Pet. 2. 9. Rev. 1.6.) More precious then Gold, Gold of Ophir. The Lord hath avenged me on mine enemy, that roared over me night and day, to have devoured me; but he hath delivered me. They that know thy Name, will trust in thee, because thou Lord never failest them that seek thee, (Psal. 9. 10.) Before she called (meaning her self,) he answered: whilst she was asking, he heard, and delivered me from all my fears. She asked again, will not M ^r Iessey and M ^r Simpson come, to praise and magnify the Lord with me? they have prayed for me. Then were her ears opened, that since April 6. had been deaf, except only at that time that she longed to hear that her Mother had pardoned her, and that she might see and hear her Brother. For then she being asked, whether she desired to live, she heard, and said; I am contented with what the Lord will, though I would rather die. Being told, M ^r Jesse and M ^r Simpson desired she might live. Do they? said she: I must do what the Lord will. The Cup that my Father gives me to drink, shall I not drink it? Whether to live, or to die.

Her eyes still being weak, and closed, she asked, whether it was night or no? it was answered her, it was night. She said; There will be a day when there will be no night, but the Lord and the Lamb shall be the light, and walk in the midst of it . The Lord hath delivered me from my enemy: from the roaring of the Lyon, that roared over me : the Lord hath triumphed over him. And speaking of this, to her mother, she said: Do you not say, tis well mother? And praise the Lord? He is able to save to the uttermost, all that come to the Father by him . You may trust me now Mother, and not be afraid of me, (meaning, of hurting herself with knife, or water, as formerly she oft had attempted:) for if nobody look to me, the Lord will keep me. And the good Samaritan that healed my soul , will heal my body too. ☜

To Hannah Guy that looked to her, and watched with her, she said; The Lord will reward all your labor of love. So she lay down and spake no more till the next day at night.

April 20. at night, there being divers neighbors and loving friends come together to see her, M ^ris Collet, M ^ris Caron, M ^ris Dupper, the Relator, and divers others, about twelve or moe, which greatly desired to hear her speak, being greatly refreshed with what they had heard of her expressions, (the Lord having been praised in her behalf, both in that Parish, and in Ab-Church their neighbor-Parish, and else-where, where prayers had been put up in her behalf;) she now lying still, and had not spoken two days together since April 6.

These desiring if the will of God were so, that they might hear her self speak: she lying with a linen cloth over her eyes, which were very weak; the maid told her, M ^r Iessey was there; (he being in the company, near to her,) she then began to speak to him, and said; O magnify the Lord with me, for he hath delivered me from all my fears: not from one, but from all my fears This she spake, as all that follows, with a low voice, in a humble, modest, melting manner, her tears sometimes stopping her speech. He and the rest, listened, and were greatly affected in hearing her. It cannot affect so much in hearing it at second hand, as if you had heard her self, with such brokennes of heart uttering it. She proceeded on thus, (which presently was writ down:) He hath regarded the low estate, the base estate of his hand-maid. I rejoice in him. I mourn over him, whom I have pierced . It was not Judas or Soldiers so much, as I that pierced him. I thought I was the bad Theef: but he hath said to me as to the good Theef . Thou shalt be with me in Paradise. The earthly Paradise, was a Type of the Heavenly Paradise. That was fading and lost; but this endures forever.

O praise the Lord with me, for he hath heard me, and looked on me, the vilest of sinners, the worst, the chiefest of sinners: On me, that was rebellious, disobedient, unthankful, unholy; a murmurer, as much as ever the children of Israel in the wilderness, (the tears oft trickling down, and she stopping, through her weeping,) and their murmuring kept them out of Canaan , but though I have so murmured, he hath saved me. I was at the very pits brink, at the very brink of hell: and the Lord fetched me out. And is not he worthy of praise? The Lamb is worthy to open the Book. For none in Heaven nor earth, neither men nor Angels, could open these brazen gates, this iron door, this hard heart of mine, but he. [putting her hand to her own breast.] When I confessed my sin, he forgave me the punishment. I could never confess my sin, til now that he made known his mercy to me; though I sought it diligently to confess it. Being asked when was this that see confessed her sin? She said, Now since I saw his mercy. And now he hath made known to me his mercy. Nothing but the sense of his mercy, could ever bring me to confess my sin indeed, I would fain have got comfort by mine own workings, my own doings, or from a Creature, and I spake to men: but I never could get comfort by the creature, but the Lord himself did it. I could not love him, till he made known his love to me : to me, the chiefest of sinners. If all the sins in all the world, were in one party, I thought it was all nothing to mine. I could not find any in all the Scriptures that obtained mercy, that was in my case. Yes he hath showed mercy to me, the chiefest of sinners . O, that he should come from the bosom of the Father, to die for sinners! for me, the chiefest of sinners. If all the men in the world should have told me, that Christ died for me; that my sins were pardoned, I could not have believed them. But now, if all the men in the world, & Angels & Devils, should tell me they are not forgiven, I would not believe them.

What pains did I take in going to men, to have them speak comfort to me, & they could not do it. But Christ did it in a moment. They that know his Name, will trust in him: they cannot but trust in him . If the world knew him, they could not but love him. He is the chiefest of ten thousands . He is more to be desired in his lowest estate, then millions of worlds, if millions of worlds were all in one.

Behold, O daughter of Jerusalem: Thy King comes meek, that he might teach his people meekness. He came on an Asses Colt: not on a horse finely trimmed; to an untamed heiser, unaccustom'd to the yoke; ( to me, that was ungodly, unprepared) to Ephraim, that was as a wild Asses colt. Surely, after I was turned, I repented . I could not turn to him, nor love him, till he showed his love to me, and turned me.

Praise the Lord with me, that hath showed mercy on one in so desperate a case as I was in. I could set nothing before me, but curse, and hell, and wrath, night and day. O that others may be are what God hath done for such a one, (Ps. 66.16.) I would none may DESPAIR of God's mercy, that hath done thus for me. If any did know what it is to murmur against God, and against a Parent, as I have done, and felt what I have felt, they would never do it. (A like warning is pag. 24.)

The Relator having heard she now had not eaten anything at all for twenty-four days or more, and drunk nothing in all this time since April 6. but only fair water; neither that, but two or three little cups together, once in two or three days. He desired her, if she could, to eat, to preserve life: for when the Lord saith, Thou shalt not kill: he implies the Affirmative, Thou shalt use all good means to preserve life. (Jam. 2.11.) And though he, and all those present, were so affected, even to admiration, in hearing a child so speak; yet he wished her to forbear speaking too much; because it spent her, she being so very weak. She said; In rest and returning shall I be saved, in quietness and confidence shall be my strength . I have Manna to eat of, he feeds me with hidden Manna . It was pleasant to the eye : but they felt no sweetness, by looking on it, but by tasting of it. When she ended speech, she desired he would praise the Lord with her; which he performed accordingly, those beforesaid being present.

[ Another time, when one gave her a Poesie, she looking on it, and smelling its sweetness, commended the workmanship of God in the several flowers: saying to this effect; The flowers are all fragrant, and some more fragrant then others, they have different colors, and different smells: and all come out of the earth. So are the Saints, they all are in Christ, and in him they all are sweet and savoury: but are of different strength, and judgment. The strong should bear with the weak, and not despise them. ]

April 25. being the Lord's day, when many Christians were come to see her, amongst others, M ^r & M ^ris Liggon, the Relator, M ^ris Jones, M ^ris Aires, M ^ris Gr. Philip's, and others.

In like humble manner, her tender eyes being covered, and lying still, (as she had kept her bed, being very weak, since April 6.) with a low voice, as speaking to her self, she said: How sweet is it to my thoughts, that an infinite God, should be a Rock and a Refuge to a finite Creature! a sure Rock and hiding place from all storms & tempests whatsoever, Ps. 46. 1.

When the man was wounded by thieves, and lay by the way; the Priest and the Levite passed by: they passed by and helped not: The creature comfort fails: and then the good Samaritan helps . Christ saves, whom none else will or can: and when there's nothing in the Creature to move him. The wounded man did not first desire the Samaritans help. The deeper the wound is, the more honor to him that cures him. He set him on his own Beast, leaves him not to himself, to go where he will: but brought him in, and gave two pence for him. I believe that holds out Faith and Love . None cared for him, refuge failed, then Christ helps, and take care for him .

One speaking to her of her former condition, how far she was then from hope ever to obtain mercy, she said; If all the world should be saved, then it may be, I should be one; but else no hopes for me. That Peter, Mary Magdalene, David, Manasseh were saved; it was nothing to me: no, if Judas should be saved, yet should not I. All their sin, and Paul's in Persecuting, and the Thief on the Cross, and Judas, and all I could read of, or hear of, if all their sins were all put together in one; yet all were not so bad as I. Yet I obtained mercy, that thought my time of mercy was past, & that I was damned already through unbelief. I said many a time, There's no hope in thy end: and I thought I saw it. I may say, It was good for me to be afflicted, I prize his mercies the more. (Psal. 119. 69.) All terrors could not humble me; but the sight of his mercy did. I could never be kindly humbled till then. It was not mine own fitting, or mine own humbling, but Christ's fitting, and Christ's humbling; when he looks upon such a one; that humbles. He comes with his power on the soul, and causeth the soul to believe. (Eph. 1. 19.)

My tongue was not able to tell the misery I was in before continually: and now my tongue is not able to tell what love and mercy hath been shown to me, I can never enough express his Name. I would fain have been dissolved, to be with him . It was a hard thing for me to be content to live here still: but its easy for him to teach, to be willing to live or die: and he hath taught me .

I was so desperate, I cared not what became of me: oft was I at very brink of death and hell: even at the very gates, and they were open for me; and then Christ shut them, and fetched me out: as Daniel that was in the Lions den, but it was his mercy that stopped the mouth of the roaring Lyon, and delivered me. (Dan. 6.)

The hundredth and seventh Psalm ; O that men would therefore praise the Lord for his goodness, and declare the wonders that he doth for the children of men. I would that Psalm were often read over. The goodness of God is unsearchable. How great is the excellency of his Majesty; that yet he would look upon such a one as I! I was full of Terror the week before I kept my bed: I rested not day nor night. I thought no death was bad enough for me. If all kinds of death were put together in one, it was too good for me. I walked continually as in fire and brimstone, for rebelling and murmuring against God, and against a Parent.

When he hides his face, who is able to bear it? and when he gives quietness, who then can trouble? [ Job 34.29.] I can testify the truth of both these. He hath spoke the word to me, Thy sins are forgiven thee; I even I am he that blotteth out thy transgressions for mine own sake, Isa. 43. 25. Jesus Christ is unchangeable, therefore I was not consumed. We may say with admiration, What is man, that thou art so mindful of him? or the son of man, that thou so regardest him? thou madest him lower then Angels . Jesus Christ took our nature, to take part of our sufferings; and that we should follow him in sufferings, & not think strange. We have not a High Priest, that cannot be touched with a feeling of our infirmities , but he was made like to us, that he might sympathize with us, Bless the Lord, O my soul! Which forgiveth all thine iniquity; and healeth all thine infirmity. In my misery my flesh and my bones pined, and consumed away, and I was near to death. [the Lord's cheering the heart doth good like a medicine:] I now recover, strength. I read the Scriptures from a child: but I understood not what I read till now, that I had the Teaching of the Spirit.

He is worth the waiting for him. There is a blessing pronounced to such, Blessed are all that wait for him. I did not wait patiently for him. I was weary, and could wait no longer. But he is not weary: He faileth not. He lets the Creature go his way for a time, for his own good, to humble him more, and show his mercy the more. He hath him in a chain, and the enemy in a chain. So he hath the soul, to dispose of it. (My times are in thy hands:) that he might magnify mercy indeed, and free love indeed. No soul ever was as I have been: I am sure of it. If all the sins of all sinners that I read of, or heard talk of, were in one, it were all short of me. And yet tis his goodness that such a one as I, should obtain mercy. I wish all may take heed of censuring the vilest creatures that are, seeing the Lord hath done thus for me the vildest Creature: but pity them with tears of blood.

One asked her, how long it was since her hearing was restored to her? She answered, A few days ago, I asked if M ^r Simson and M ^r Jesse would come to praise the Lord with me? and I found it was restored at that instant.

Part of a former Conference between her, and another young Gentlewoman, M ^ris A. whilst both were in despair. They met in Lawrence Pountney, to hear the Lecture, before it began, M ^ris Sarah saw one walk about and about in a sad habit, and went to her, and asked her how she did, she answered; In as sad a condition as ever was any.

M ^ris Sarah, None is in a Condition like to mine. So they sat together; and after that, they went together, and spake further of their sad conditions: each counting their own state the worse.

Another day, M ^ris A. said, The Lord knows, that knows all things, that I would rather then all the world, that I were in your condition.

M ^ris Sarah W. answ.

But if you knew, how desperate my condition is, you would be afraid to change place with me, for you know not my sad sorrows. None in the world can compare with mine. Except you would desire to be in hell, you would not desire to be in my condition.

M ^ris A.

I must be damned.

M ^ris S.

I am damned already, from all eternity, to all eternity: its not to do, but tis done already.

M ^ris A.

I was a great professor, but I was but an hypocrite, and an hypocrites hope shall perish.

M ^ris S.

I have been an hypocrite, a revolter, a backslider.

M ^ris A.

I know it shall be well with you.

M ^ris S.

As well as it was with Judas, who repented, and hanged himself: which I must do, before I shall be free from these torments.

At their parting, for a farewell, M ^ris A. said, I think I shall perish ere I see you again.

Yet the Lord spared her, and she came to her again: and they were somewhat gladded to see each other again, that could be sensible, each of the others condition.

To sadded souls, some joy it is, to have companions.

She had another Conference, April 24. 1647. since she was comforted, with another Maid being in deep despair, that had heard of her former despair, and her late comforts. The words were to this effect.

Maid.

I am darkened in understanding, and I am tempted to believe there is no God, nor no Creation from God.

M ^ris Sarah W. ans.

So was it with me, I was so tempted: The very Creation shows there is a God , and yet I could not believe it.

Maid said:

Some kept a fast for me yesterday, and I remain as I was still, and therefore I am the more terrified, that no prayers shall be heard for me.

M ^ris Sarah W.

So was it with me; I was so terrified when there was no answer of prayers for me, when in my days were kept for me: But I was rather worse then better. For I knew no prayers should be heard for a damned Creature. I concluded, I was rejected. But the Lord's time is the best time to give an answer .

Maid.

I have resisted the Spirit. The Lord hath spoken mercy to me, but I have resisted it.

M ^ris Sarah W.

The day of Sealing was not come: then you could not resist that work when he comes with power : else you would make God weaker then you. God would bring you this way about, and hides himself, when you have grieved the Spirit, that you may seek him the more earnestly: and that he may give you the surer comforts; and to make himself a glorious Name: as in Isa. 63. 10, 11. They rebelled, and vexed his holy Spirit, therefore he fought against them, as an enemy. Then he remembered the days of old, when he led them by the right hand of Moses, dividing the water before them, to make himself an everlasting Name. That led them through the deep. So through the deepest troubles, till the Spirit of the Lord causeth them to rest, to make himself a glorious Name. Though you have rebeld, and vexed his holy Spirit, what could you do more? yet saith he, I have carried thee all the days of old. I will be your guide even to death.

Maid.

Its not possible that such a one as I, should find mercy: I look every moment, to be swallowed up.

M ^ris Sarah W.

But God's thoughts are not your thoughts, nor God's ways, your ways . In the Wilderness Israel murmured, yet the Rock followed them, not they the Rock, but went from the Rock, yet the Rock followed them; and that Rock is Christ . So this Rock will follow you in this your Wilderness.

Maid.

Its not possible; I find such a wicked heart, that if it were not for fear of wrath or punishment, I should fall into all wickedness.

M ^ris Sarah W.

Now you show you believe there is a God. You are not worse then Peter that so denied and forswore him, against his Conscience : or then Mary Magdalene, that had seven Devils, was full of the Devil . The Thief on the Cross, Persecuting Paul, that persecuted Christ, and myself, was so injurious and blasphemous—The chief of sinners, yet these found mercy. And what can you be more? You can be but a sinner, and the chief of sinners. He died for such. He is therefore called Jesus, because he shall save his people from their sins. What people? those that were not a people, these he calls, and these he saves.

Maid.

I am no better for going to the means: and am ready to neglect all.

M ^ris Sarah W.

I was so terrified, I was not able to go to the means: and then I was terrified for not going to them. I had no rest in either. If I went, salvation was turned into condemnation to me. If I went not, it was death; I was on the Rack.

Maid.

None can be in a worse condition then I; full of fears.

M ^ris Sarah W.

Of late my case was so, that if one had been all day burning in fire, they could not have been in a worse condition.

Maid.

I am in such extremities of late, I am even almost spent, and have nothing to relieve me by.

M ^ris Sarah W.

So it was with me of late. When you are at the lowest, Christ is readiest to restore soul and body. If you see yourself nothing; and see all fullness in Christ, you are the nearest to comfort . The Lord hath done as much for me, as ever for any: as much as for the man that had the Legion of Devils in him: he was clothed, and in his right mind; he hath clothed me, and put me in my right mind, and set me at his feet . God doth away our sins, as a thick cloud, but it wants manifesting to your soul. His time is the best time, therefore wait for him.

Maid.

I am an ungracious creature: I cannot wait any longer.

M ^ris Sarah W.

But the Lord waits on you. You think you are ungracious: and he waits to be gracious to such as you. There's as much of the power of the Lord seen in upholding a soul in such a condition, as in delivering it.

Maid.

I am utterly lost.

M ^ris Sarah W.

Not in his account: you must be lost in yourself, that you may be found in him: He came to seek and to save that was lost .

Thus she endeavored the comforting another, with the Consolations wherewith she was comforted: yet the poor soul went sad away. And she being much affected with the others sad condition, pitying her, after she was gone away; she desired some that came to see her, to pray for that maid.

After this, came another woman to her, being also in deep despair ; having heard of her former despair, and present comforts: and complained to her of her sad condition. To whom she gave such succouring Answers for upholding and refreshing her weary soul, as she had done to the former: speaking to her, till she was very much spent.

Another that came to see her, having heard her so manifest her fullness of joy and content in God, in such high streines: Told her, she must expect a change, and had need to lay up in store, against times to come. She answered, thus; Sarah W. If I should look to take out of my store, I should quickly be a Bankrupt, a Prodigal, and spend it quickly. But Christ hath in store for me. All my fresh . Springs are in him.

May 2. being the Lord's day: Many that had heard what the Lord had done for her soul, came to see her, and heard her in a humble sort, with a low voice, (being very weak in body) magnify the Lord and his Grace to her soul. To one then, she said as followeth, (which was presently writ.) O magnify the Lord in my behalf, that daily compasseth me about with songs of deliverance. I could not endure, but that I see him that's invisible. I could not see him, but that he saw me first, and gave me faith. He loved me, and washed me in his blood, (Rev. 1.5.) He loved me before I was washed: and because he loved me, therefore he washed me.

He was tempted as we are. He had no need to be tempted, but to succor tempted ones, such poor creatures as I. He takes delight to succor such poor souls. Its our Fathers good pleasure, to give us a Kingdom. Its his good pleasure, he delights in giving us a Kingdom. (Rom. 8. end) Its neither height nor depth, neither Principalities, nor powers, nor any other Creature, that shall separate that soul, that's in union with him. He hath bound the soul to himself, with the cords of love, and there shall be no separation from it.

May 3. In the morning, one having spoken to her, she thus answered: I am not only filled with the Spirit, but, if one may say it, drunk with the Spirit: it overcomes me. [Alluding, it seems, to Eph. 5. 18. Be not drunk with wine,—but be filled with the Spirit ; or to Act. 2. 15-17. These are not drunk—but the Spirit is poured out upon them. ]

One said to her, Your enjoyments are more then of many Saints, if theirs were put together in one.

She answered; My sufferings have been more then of many. Christ is faithful in all he hath spoken: he will not fail in one promise. He saith, as our sufferings abound, so our Consolations abound . There's many Saints have lived threescore years, that have not suffered so much as I have done in one month. The Lord was my Shield at my right hand, therefore no hurt could come unto me. Christ is in me, the hope of glory ,

The God of peace shall tread Satan under our feet shortly . He shall do it, he hath done it: I see it done. Though he was strong that possessed this house, a stronger then he hath dispossessed him, and possessed it himself , None could do it but himself: it was too hard for men or Angels. I am silent at the Goodness of God. If I had the tongue of men and Angels, I could not tell the terrors formerly, nor my present enjoyments.

Many strangers (good and bad) came to see her, amongst others, there came one with Crochets: and when she was silent, vented some, to others present: at the hearing whereof, she was troubled and sweat; and at last she burst out, saying: Let them that have received Christ, as the Truth is in Jesus, speak of nothing, but the freeness of the love of God; and of a full Christ, to a nothing Creature: and not of whimsies.

May 4. When M ^ris Langham, Colonel Langhams wife, with some other, came to see her, and spake to her, desiring to hear of the dealings of God with her: she answered, telling her of God's abundant Goodness to her, to this effect:

Jesus Christ found me, and loved me, before I could love him. He came to me, in the most disconsolate condition that ever soul was in. When I must either be delivered, or be destroyed, I could abide no longer; then Christ came. Christ is my life, and my life is hid with Christ in God . And when Christ shall appear, I shall appear with him in Glory, How admirable is it, that he should die, to give me life! He is to be admired in his Saints. He came to give Faith to a faithless soul; and to soften hard and unbelieving hearts. He brought such as were aliens and enemies , to be near in himself: and is not this to be admired?

He first finds the soul, and then the Spouse saith, She had found him whom her soul loveth. He destroys self; righteous self, and all self, that he alone might have the glory. He leaves nothing for the Creature to boast in. Its his Wisdom, that he alone might have the Glory. Turn thou me, and I shall be turned; Heale me, and I shall be healed; Convert me, and I shall be converted; So many soul hath found by experience.

One told her, Its said; Turn ye, why will ye die, O house of Israel?

She answered; Its Christ that comes with a power in the Word, and turns them. And the Church knew her own unsufficiency to return, and therefore she saith; Turn me, and I shall be turned . Behold, he comes leaping over the mountains, and skipping over the hills. He makes rough places plain; and raiseth up valleys . Its easy for him to pardon mountainous sins, multitudes of sins, as one sin. He came to me, and pardoned me, though my sins were as the stars in Heaven for multitude. He hath delivered me, from the hard bondage, wherein I was made to serve. He appeared to me in the dark and thick Cloud, a thick Cloud indeed; One beam of the Sun of righteousness, dispeld it in a moment. What a sinful creature was I? I never read of any that was in so desperate a condition as I: And he hath delivered me, from all my fears: not from one or two, but from all my fears. Therefore I desire high and low, rich and poor, to magnify the Lord, and to praise his Name in my behalf: that he hath looked on the low and base estate of his handmaid. His works praise him; his Saints bless him, (Ps. 145. 10.) Especially the work of the New Creation in the soul. I could believe nothing before, but that there was no Hell but in this life: I had no rest; no rest in hearing, nor reading,—and then he made me rest on himself .

And though I was weary and faint, He was neither weary nor faint: His wrath is but for a moment: but of his goodness and mercy, there is no end. He lays the foundation, and he builds up. Its I the Lord do all. He bare me, and carried me, and did at last deliver me. This Rock followed me, though I was not aware of him. The Sun of righteousness arose, with healing, under his wings, and the day-star arose in my heart . It was a dark heart till he arose, and then he made it light. Christ suffered for me: He needed not to suffer, and be tempted, but to succor such as me that was tempted . I never had rest, till I saw myself crucified with Christ , and that my sins pierced him: and there came out of his side, a fountain of blood, for the guilt of sin: and not only so, but a fountain of water, to wash away the filth of sin: to wash away all my filth. There's enough in him, not only to justify, but also to sanctify .

The life that I now live, is by the faith of the Son of God, who hath loved me, and given himself for me: though before, I was an unbeliever, and unholy, and unthankful, and a murmurer, and every way sinful: yet now hath he loved me, and washed me. And it not be to be prized and admired of all his Saints? And his Name to be had in everlasting remembrance? He proclaimed his Name to be Merciful, and Gracious, abundant in Goodness, and in Truth; and that to sinners, to the chief of sinners.

May 4. 1647. The same day at evening, when some came to see her, M ^r Iessey, and M ^ris Palmer, wife of the late Minister there in Lawrence Pountney, who with M ^r Palmer, had known her soul in affliction. One telling her, M ^ris Palmer was glad to hear of God's goodness to her.

M ^ris Sarah said:

I desire that M ^r Palmer, and you, and all God's people, may praise and magnify the Lord for his goodness, in looking down on the base estate of his handmaid.

M ^ris Palmer said:

After what manner did your comforts come in to you?

M ^ris Sarah.

My earthly tongue cannot express, what I felt, its beyond expression. I was in such extremity, that either deliverance must come, or I must perish, I was able so bold no longer. Then I fell into a Trance. [This was April 6. at night] I lay in visions. And in that time, the Spirit of God was pour'd in upon me. And then Jesus Christ was presented to me, as crucified for my sins; I saw it; and myself crucified with him: and when I saw a glimpse of his love, then I mourned bitterly for my sins; and never truly sorrowed for sin, till then. I never mourned for sin, as sin, before. But then I mourned bitterly . And now praise the Lord with me and let us magnify his Name together.

M ^ris Palmer.

Are you nod desirous to enjoy your inheritance?

M ^ris Sarah.

Yes. But Christ hath taught me by what I enjoy, to submit to his will. My terrors so long, were nothing to one moment of mercies. All the miseries I endured, though they were very great, were nothing to one glimpse of his mercy.

M ^ris Palmer.

How are your thoughts acted? what are they acted upon?

M ^ris Sarah.

A living active Christ, in a dead passive creature, makes it act to God .

For a farewell, she said; Rejoice in the Lord with me.

Mention was made before, that from the 27 ^th of March, to the 21. of April, in those 24. days, she had not eaten at all; and her drink had been only two, or three, or four little cups of fair water, once in two, or three, or in four days together. Some having spoken of this, others have counted it a forgery, or pretence: By such injections, the Enemy would obscure and darken the Works of the Great God of Heaven. But many Godly Ministers and Gracious Saints, that know M ^ris Wight, and the Maid, and this Daughter of Abraham ; have ground to judge, they truly fear the Lord: and that they dare not lie, but abhor lying. Now the Relator by conference with them, hath it from their own mouths, that from the time of her ceasing to be in Trances, and to be deaf and blind, (which was April 19.) to the day of the writing of this part of the Relation, being May 5. she hath not taken so much sustenance, as she did take in that time from March 27. to April 19. [And from May 5. till June 11. [being the longest day in the year] less then that from April 19. The power of God appearing therein wonderfully to the beholders, in upholding her full 75 days without one crumb of bread or meat, and with so little drink;] She not being able to eat, or to drink more then she did, but against her stomach. When she by urging, yielded to take somewhat, she could not keep it, but presently cast it up. She never loved to drink, strong waters, nor strong drink, from her infancy.

And when the Relator was told, they could not get her to take of a Cordial that was sent to her from a Lady that had been with her, (as they judged, by the direction of D ^r Debote, or of D ^r Worsley, whom the Lady had lately sent to her:) he persuaded her to take of it, and put it to her mouth: But she said, She could not: and said that the smell of it made her sick. Which caused him to forbear further urging of her.

When lately one desired her, if she could to take some sustenance: She answered:

I would, if I could, but I cannot, it makes me sick to think of it. Jesus Christ feeds me.

May 2. One asked her, if she would drink. M ^ris Sarah answered: I cannot: I have Jesus Christ, I have enough: he feeds me with delights—He not only hath drops; but he flows in of himself.

She was further urged to take somewhat: M ^ris Sarah answered: She desired not to be urged: God hath given me food for my soul, when my soul was well nigh starving for want of food: but God hath given me Christ to feed upon: and his flesh is meat indeed; and his blood drink indeed . God hath wrought a miracle, in delivering my soul. And if that he hath appointed life, he will give me strength to take in the one, as well as the other. Now I am worse when I take it.

May 3. When she was wished to drink: M ^ris Sarah answered; I have wines well refined, no dregs are in it. Its pure; that's the purity of Christ. He gives me not cups full; but he hath me into his wine-cellar , and fills me with flagons.

May 4. M ^ris Palmer desired her, that she would take something to uphold her, that she might be an instrument of God's glory, that had done so much for her.

She answered; What ever is for his glory, he will enable me to do it: If it be his will, that I should continue, he will give me power to take in the Creature.

May 5. M ^ris Palmer came again to her, being very desirous to further her to eat or drink somewhat, to nourish her.

She gave some such answer as is beforesaid.

M ^ris Palmer said,

What promise have you, that any should live without food?

M ^ris Sarah presently answered,

Man lives not by bread only, but by every word that proceedeth out of the mouth of God ,

M ^ris Palmer.

Whats meant by Word there?

M ^ris Sarah.

I think tis meant of Christ his love and mercy and goodness to poor sinners: and thats enough for any soul to live upon.

M ^ris Palmer answered.

Its enough for the soul: but how shall the body do?

M ^ris Sarah.

If it be the will of God, that more of his power shall be seen in sustaining me, with so little: his will is good. [She having said before, that they saw, that when she took somewhat, that it made her sick.]

M ^ris Palmer asked her,

Do your comforts remain still as clear and fresh, as at first?

M ^ris Sarah answered.

Yes; I have a standing River, continually to drink of.

M ^ris Palmer asked,

Do you sleep quietly without Dreams?

M ^ris Sarah answered.

I have dreams: and sometimes I dream of the free love of God towards me. But once or twice I dreamed of the former terrors I was in; and I trembled exceedingly, and the bed shook under me exceedingly. But I awaked, and presently all was gone. For he is unchangeable: yesterday, and today, and the same forever . This was May 5. 1647.

At the former Conference with M ^ris Palmer, the Relator was present, and then writ. Both the former and the latter, M ^ris Palmer her self writ, from whom the Relator had it: and compared both together.

To another she declared what torments she had undergone for a month together, before she was forced to keep her bed: (which hath been ever since April 6.) How she walked in terror day and night; what a Hell she had in her Conscience; and was tempted to believe there was neither God nor Devil, neither Heaven nor Hell; but what she felt in her Conscience: And therefore if she were but out of this life, there was an end of all her torments. And hence she sought to beat out her brains, against the wall, many times: and thereby was bloody and sweld. And sought to cast her self down from steep places: and got knives and other things to kill her self withal; but was miraculously preserved: because the Lord had a favor to her, in her base estate. But then she thought, If Christ should come in to her, it was as if he should go into a dunghill, into a carraine. That she was tempted to blaspheme God, and had much ado to keep it in: especially the last day of her souls affliction. Wherein she was very forcibly urged to blaspheme God and die, and so be out of her Torment ; which yet she refused to speak it out: till at last, she could no longer withhold, but was even ready to utter forth that blasphemy: and even then was her Tongue smit, that she could not speak. She told moreover that she usually every morning formerly was wont to read above twenty Chapters, and so would have stilled her Temptations; but was not a jot the better. That she could remember nothing of what she had read, but the judgments, and they were laid open to her: But all the promises were sealed from me, said she. One day I was tempted to throw my Bible into the fire, and I threw it from me, but it fell not into the fire. But for this I was sore tormented, that I would have thrown it into the fire.

Another time in my trouble, I said, what I was urged to say; it was this; If the Lord will not save me, let him do what he will with me: Let him damn me. But afterwards, I was greatly terrified for it, that I should bid him damn me.

And now she saw the evil of yielding to such Temptations: she thought to have had ease by yielding: but she was the more terrified for her yielding. And yet the Lord magnified his mercy to her; when she thought, that by such yeeldings, God would surely damn her. [O the depths of Satan's wiles: and O the greater depths of the Goodness of God! even so such seduced souls!]

She further said; That the same day wherein she was forced to lie down (viz. April 6.) she was taken in all her body: All was shaken, and she trembled exceedingly. That her hands were clinch'd up together, and so were her feet, as if it were by the Cramp; and her mouth was drawn up, as a purse; and her eyes were with the eylids folded up and closed; and her hearing was taken from her; and she had no motion nor desire of any good. Mine own eyes (said she) pitied not myself; and just then was the time of love . And then the Good Samaritan, then Jesus Christ came, and pour'd in wine and oil, when I had most need. I may well shy, He is a refuge , a very present help in time of Trouble.

May 7. Was another Conference between her and the Maid before mentioned April 24. which was at that present taken by the Relator.

M ^ris Sarah W.

How do you? Have you not found him yet, whom your soul loveth?

Maid told how long she had been thus, and yet was no better, and how sad her case was.

M ^ris Sarah.

I have been in as sad a condition ever since I was about nine years old. And that daughter of Abraham whom Satan had bound loe those eightteene years , yet Christ healed.

Maid.

But he will destroy me.

M ^ris Sarah.

How dare you say so, when Christ saith, He came not to destroy sinners, but their sin: but to save them, such as you and I.

Maid.

He'l save them he hath chosen, but I am none of them.

M ^ris Sarah.

Dare you enter into God's secrets? Who made you of his secret Counsel ? Secrets belong to God.

Maid.

Aye, but I would not hearken.

M ^ris Sarah.

Its neither in him that willeth, nor in him that runneth, but in God that showeth mercy .

Maid.

But I resisted when he would.

M ^ris Sarah.

Your time was not come: for if his time had been to have come, its not all your power, that could hinder his power.

Maid.

I put out the light, and I walked contrary to his way.

M ^ris S.

You were not in the light, nor true way, till you have Christ. He is the light , & the way.

Maid.

I can do nothing as I should.

M ^ris S.

If you had done all, yet you might be but as the young man in the Gospel, that said; All this have I done: Yet he wanted one thing: So you want one thing, the sealing of his love to your soul. You must lie low before God. Its Christ that both throws down, & Christ that raiseth up . He did both to me.

Maid.

My heart is desperate.

M ^ris S.

The heart of man is deceitful above all things, and is desperately wicked . Its the depth of misery, cries to the depth of mercy.

Maid.

I am blind and see not the depth.

M ^ris Sarah.

Your eyes are blind yet; and Christ came to open the eyes of the blind, not of them that see, but that are blind . Its Christ must wash you with clean water; He must give it, and he will work , and who shall let him.

Maid.

But I resisted, and such must be willing.

M ^ris S.

But thats in the day of his power, then they shall be willing . My body is weak to speak to you, but my Spirit is willing , because he hath made it willing, in the day of his power.

Maid.

I have gone many a weary step to get comfort, but can get none.

M ^ris Sarah.

Christ was weary for you, to sympathize with you. The strong man possessed me, till Christ came who is stronger, and dispossess'd him . And so will be do to you.

Maid.

I am in depths of misery.

M ^ris Sarah.

Its not depths of mercy that calls for depths of misery: but its depths of misery calls for depths of mercy . Now God would root you, and establish you, and now Satan is most busy with you.

Maid.

I am pulled up by the roots.

M ^ris Sarah.

Christ will root you out of your sin, and root you out of yourself: and plant you in himself. He will do it.

Maid.

I saw God full of Glory in the firmament.

M ^ris Sarah.

He will make you and me to see him as he is, and we shall be like him in Glory .

Maid.

But I cannot believe.

M ^ris Sarah.

I lay in unbelief, and could believe nothing, but that there was no God, and no Devil, and no Hell: till he made me believe in himself: and the same power that did it for me, the same will do it for you: for he is yesterday, and today, and the same forever : for he is unchangeable.

Maid.

I had a glimpse of God, but I have backslidden from him.

M ^ris Sarah.

Say thus to God; Turn me, and I shall be turned: the Lord saith; I will heal your backslidings, and love you freely . I will love you though you have backslidden, and heal your backslidings.

Maid.

He speaks it not to me.

M ^ris Sarah.

Why not to you, when tis free: to backsliders: And he is found of them that sought him not What can you say to this?

Maid.

That's to one in the first work.

M ^ris Sarah.

Its in the first work, and the second work too. He takes pleasure to work both the will and the deed .

Maid.

The Lord forewarnd me, and I hearkened not to him, and now he is gone.

M ^ris Sarah.

This is nothing but sin and Satan, to hinder you from closing with the Scriptures that are set before you. Say to God; Heale me, I have sinned. Heale my backslidings.

Maid.

I am no better for saying it, when I have no heart or Spirit to pray.

M ^ris S.

Say it, though you be no better; because God bids you say it: Say it, and say it again, till he heal you. It may be, he will come in, when you say it, if you can but say it with your lips: the everlasting arms of God, can reach you, when you cannot reach him; his are everlasting arms. He reached Ephraim, are you more wild than he? that was at a bullock unaccustom'd to the yoke? Ephraim, an untamed heiser , that snuf'd up the wind? Yet God tames him, and he saith, Turn thou me, and I shall be turned: Say you so to God.

M ^ris Sarah having still kept her bed from April 6, till this May 7; and neither eat nor drunk all this while, but according to the proportion beforesaid; and being very weak and faint: the Maid was desired to forbear speaking anymore, then unto her, and to come again another time.

May 9. Being the Lord's day, after both Sermons, these came to see her; M ^r and M ^ris Liggon, the Relator, M ^ris Dawson, a Ministers widow, M ^ris Berny, of Norfolk, and many others; amongst which was a Gentlewoman in sad despair, that hearing of her, came to have speech with her, and had. The Relator writ then what was said after he came thither.

The Conference followeth.

Gentlewoman.

The Devil Rules in me.

M ^ris Sarah.

Christ will fetch you from him, he will dispossess him, and possess himself.

Gentle.

I am under sin.

M ^ris Sarah.

Shall sin separate from the love of Christ? God hides himself from the house of Jacob: though dear to him.

She speaking low, one asked the Gentlewoman if she did hear.

M ^ris Sarah.

O that you might hear Christ speak to you.

Gentle.

I cannot believe I am justified: for such are sanctified: and so am not I.

M ^ris Sarah.

You speak of sanctifying. Its against the scope of the Scripture, to put sanctifying before justifying. You should believe that God justifieth the ungodly , thats for you to believe now; (and thence would arise your sanctification:) And that you cannot come to him, except he draw you . That all power is in his hand. He is greater then all: and none can pull you out of his hands. Devils, nor Angels, nor sin, can keep from him, when he will draw you.

Gentlew.

None knows my condition, how desperate it is.

M ^ris Sarah.

The heart is deceitful above all things, and desperately wicked, who can know it ? He that hath Balm of, he, and he alone can heal it. None can wound the soul but himself: and none can heal it, but himself; I found that everlasting arms were under me, and kept me, though I knew it not. He taught Ephraim to go, though he wist it not ,

Gentlew.

I am rebellious against him.

M ^ris Sarah.

He ascended and gave gifts to men, even to the rebellious . The great gift he gives them, is himself; and from that great gift, are all other gifts, as all the streams are from the fountain.

If thou knewest that gift of God, thou wouldst ask it, and he would give it . She had a veil before her heart, but he took it away, and he gave her to ask; she could not ask, till then.

I found that no other sin separates from Christ, but unbelief; and did he come to find faith in earth, in earthen hearts ? there's nothing but death, and unbelief, and envy, and rebellion, and all manner of evil, till Christ came; and he gave faith to me, he found it not.

Qu:

In what manner was his giving faith to you?

M ^ris Sarah.

At first I saw clearly, Christ crucified for my sins. It was neither Judas, nor Pilate, nor Herod, nor any other, so much as my sins. That he was the skape-goat, that bare them all away into the Wilderness of forgetfulness, never to be remembered anymore . I cannot tell my misery how great it was: and I cannot tell the mercy, that a full Christ came to such an empty creature; to such a one as I, that was as Ephraim, an untamed heiser, unaccustomed to the yoke. Then his Name was proclam'd to me, that he was a Savior, to save sinners: merciful, gracious, longsuffering, abounding in goodness, and abounding in truth, to fulfill all that mercy and goodness: and he is the way to the Father. Ah! that he should love such a one, and marry such a one! that was a murmurer; disobedient, unholy—Such a one God was pleasd to make an object of mercy. There's an end of my misery, though I thought, there was no end of it: but there's no end of his mercy; my misery, was the misery of a creature; but his mercy, is the mercy of a God, and there's no end of it. I was brought as low, at the lowest hell. The gates were open to receive me: that then mercy should come to shut them! that Christ came to fetch me out! He is good, and doth good: not to them that are good, but he makes good; nor to fill them that are full; but to fill them that are empty. I will leave in them an afflicted and poor people, and they shall trust in the Name of the Lord: they that are afflicted and poor, its they shall trust in his name . And whats his Name? but forgiving iniquity, transgression, and sin. I made thee rest, from thy hard bondage, wherein thou wast made to serve: hard bondage, and made to serve this hard bondage . Yet God delivered, when none else could. In the first verse, the LORD will have mercy on Jacob, and will yet choose Israel. I had no will, nor no desire to him, nothing but perverseness and wretchedness, as in Israel. I might speak and speak a long time, days and weeks, and months, and not able to tell all my misery. The Lord loved me, and he chastend me: as he saith to Laodicea, As many as I love, I rebuke and chasten .

Gentlew.

All afflictions are for good to them that love God: but they bring me no good at all.

M ^ris Sarah.

I warrant you David could not say, His afflictions were good for him, when he said, They are gone over my head, my heart fails me . But it was afterwards that he said, It is good for me to be afflicted. The Prodigal, whilst he was in his sin and misery, could not say, it was best for him. But how did his Father & friends rejoice afterwards ? I desire all the Saints might rejoice as much for me, as they did for him. Christ came to seek and to save that that was lost. I found it so. I read, God is good to them that are of a pure heart, and I was troubled at it; for mine was not pure . That heart is pure, that he makes pure; he finds it not pure, but he makes it pure. When I read, I read the promises, over and over, but I could remember nothing of them: but if I read but a tittle of the judgments, that remained with me. I could remember the verse where they are. At last, the promises terrified me most of all; because they were for others, but not for me. None could burst these brazen gates, but Christ alone. I was worse then a Beast. Beasts praise God in their kind. But I dishonored him. But all this hindered not his love to me.

Would you love God first? or would you have him love you first?

Gentlew.

I do not love him.

M ^ris Sarah.

We are by nature far from loving him: we are enemies to him: God reconciles enemies . Its we were enemies to God, `not God an enemy to us. An enemy would not reconcile enemies. But God reconciled us, when we were enemies to him. We were then without God, far off, in the lusts of our flesh, fulfilling them; dead in sins and trespasses, Eph. 2. read it. When God comes with power, he quickens them that were dead in sins.

Are you weary in your Condition?

Gentlew.

I give over all means, I think it bootless to use any for me.

M ^ris Sarah.

I found no help by any means, yet I went on. I was contented with nothing; to hear, or not to hear; read, or not read; pray, or not pray; no peace in anything. I have great experience of that place, If he give peace, who then can trouble? but if he hide away his face, who is able to bear it ? You do not seek him: and he saith ; I am found of them that sought me not, that asked not for me. I said, Behold me, behold me, to a Nation that was not called by my Name , That's a place for a poor soul to ponder much upon. Wait a little while, and he will come .

Gentlew.

If you knew what sins I am in, you would not say so to me.

M ^ris Sarah.

The blood of Christ cleanseth from all sin; not from one sin, or two sins, but from all sins.

Gentlew.

When I went on in sin, the Devil told me, I was Elected.

M ^ris Sarah.

The Devil saith no such thing, but, Thou art damned forever.

Gentle.

I have been strangely deluded by him.

M ^ris Sarah.

The sad Temptations and corruptions that deluded me! never any were in the like. I never read nor heard of any such as mine. But the Lord came in an acceptable time to succor me . When I saw I had no good by good people's speaking to me, nor their prayers for me; nor by all my reading, nor hearing; no good to me: I felt such horror, I thought hell to come, could not be worse then what I felt. I road to Shrewsbury. I would not hold the bridle; I would gladly the horse might stumble, or throw me in a ditch, and kill me: I let him go where he would. [Thus she was thrown in a ditch, and when she came to the Inn, she being all wet, would not shift her, nor dry her; but sat in the wet clothes, because she was weary of life, and would have been out of it.] I would not eat. I saw nothing but condemnation. I thought as I went, the earth was opening every foot: and that the stones in the streets would open, and swallow me up. I saw no other but condemnation. The more was my misery, the more is his mercy manifested. One moment of his mercy, swallowed up the depth of my misery.

Before, I could not eat, nor drink, but I was troubled for it: I thought it was to me, as to some at Sacrament, that I did eat and drink my damnation.

Gentlew.

I am not troubled at my condition, though I know, if I die, I go to Hell.

M ^ris Sarah.

Are you not weary of your condition? Is it no burden to you?

Gentlew.

Yes, yes.

M ^ris Sarah.

He is never weary, nor faint, in succouring sinners. Christ was weary, and was in all things tempted, as we are:

yet he knew no sin: that he might sympathize with us, and succor us that are full of sin. (Heb. 2. 18.) He hides himself from you. I will look to him that hides himself from the house of Jacob. They are Jacob, his people, yet he hides himself from them . He hides himself, that we might the more desire him; as a mother from her child.

Gent.

I am fit for nothing, I can do no work.

M ^ris Sarah.

I oft could do none: and it terrified me, that I did none, when I could do none: yet it terrified me night and day.

Gentlew.

I am not troubled, though I have no faith.

M ^ris Sarah.

You can have no true rest, till you believe. If God set on the least sin to a young child, it will terrify it as much, as the greatest sins of one thats a hundred year old, (as I have found.) When he creates peace, there will be peace .

Gentlew.

That's to his people he creates it.

M ^ris Sarah.

He calls them his people, that were not his people; and her beloved, which was not beloved ,

Gentlew.

There's no peace to the wicked.

M ^ris Sarah.

All are wicked, till he makes them good. There's no peace to sin, nor Satan, but there's peace for the sinner; Christ is peace for the lost sinner (Ep. 2.14.)

Part of another Conference May 11. 1647. taken at the writers coming in, it being begun before he came.

There's no hope for me.

There's hope in God, though none in you.

Its said; No temptation hath taken you, but that thats common to men . But that is, except they be given up, as I am; for their condition was not as mine is.

He makes no such exception: some have been before in your condition; and he saith, He makes a way to escape, not that way you think best, but the way he thinks best: that you may be able to bear it. Christ bare burdens, that you might be eased, when 'tis too heavy for you .

I cannot be affected with my case.

Its God must give it. We wrestle not with flesh and blood, but with principalities & powers: we wrestle not with them in our own strength, but in the strength of Christ, in the power of his might . [The party being silent and slow to speak, or to ask: she put out fit questions to her; and so gained in, upon her answers.] Is your sin so great, God cannot forgive you?

God can forgive me, but he will not.

God will graff them in, because God can graff them in, as he saith . No soul believes indeed that God is able to forgive it, but that believes he is as willing to forgive, as he is able.

The Lord sware, saying, As I live, I will not the death of a sinner: but that he turn from his sin . and he turns it, and it is turned. He swears, he is willing; and yet you say, he is not willing. He proclaimed his own Name, that he is Gracious—forgiving iniquity, transgression and sin: and yet you say, he is not willing to forgive you. You believe not; The great sin Christ died for, is unbelief.

You have no will to him: Its he that works both to will, and to do: and thats his good pleasure, its because he is very willing to it.

Of his own will he begat us . You see, how willing he is to it.

You see your sin now, more then you did before: Did you see it so before?

I was well enough, in my thoughts before.

Its God that gives you to see it.

The Devil can show sin by the Law.

The Devil can go no further, then his chain.

The God of peace shall tread Satan under our feet, and that shortly ` The Devil shall do that, that turns to good to God's people.

That's spoke to them, whose faith and obedience was gone abroad through the world:

Did Christ die for the obedient, or for the disobedient? Christ died for the disobedient and rebellious, that they might partake of his obedience. He died for those Romans, not when they were righteous; but while they were yet sinners, and ungodly, and enemies, Christ laid down his life for them: and what obedience was in such? Can you say, God will not give you obedience? I warrant you their disobedience went abroad first , before their obedience.

I refused all means of my good.

What if you had used all means?

Then I should have been more obedient.

Then you would have thought, you were somebody: Means should be used; But now Christ will be the more exalted, when you were so negligent. ( Isa. 43. end )

When M ^r Prig taught on those words, Arise thou that sleepest, & stand up from the dead, & Christ shall give thee light . I was moved at it, I perceived by his teaching, that sin was the sleep; & ingnorance was the cause; and repentance was the awaking. And I thought I did repent; and I began, and saw sin in others, and saw how vile sins were, and had a great desire to God and heaven: sometimes I was so; and by little and little grew cold; I sinned against Conscience; and now I walk not in light, but in darkness .

Christ is light to them that are in darkness . Who is it that awakens such, but Christ? You have been a backslider, & he saith, I will heal backslidings for my Names sake.

Now in all my reading, and all I do, I sin.

You cannot number your sins, and you cannot number his mercy. You will have the more cause to magnify his Grace, if now he come in to you.

Now tis tedious to me, to read, or hear, I am so captiv'd.

They that are free, need not be redeemed; he came to deliver captives . Neither you, nor sin, nor Satan can awake; but Christ can awake, and will awake them that sleep. No creature shall have a hand in his work, to have the praise of it: But his own hand shall lay hold on salvation.

I grew proud of it, that I knew more then others, and would be finding fault with others; when all was nothing.

I cannot believe, that ever any were beyond my condition, in self, and sin: yet hath he shown mercy on me.

I cannot be sorry for my sins.

He'l show you, that he died for your sins: and then you shall mourn over him, as one mourns for his only son . He doth not only bid, Be sorry and turn to me: But he turns the heart, and makes it sorry:

He was exalted to give repentance , and remission of sins.

What hopes have I, that have not repentance?

You have not repentance: He gives it to those that have it not, not to those that have it.

I am unthankful, undutiful.

Think not of whats in you, but of what is in Christ for you: there's unkindness in you, but kindness in him. He gives a thankful heart. His promise is to give a new heart. He saith, I will give it . You are still remembering your sins, still be remembering mercy in forgiving sins. Remember his kindness to Israel in the Wildernes: still they went from him, and still he followed them . He'l work, and who shall let ? Neither sin nor Satan shall let, when he will work. Remember that still.

Another Conference with an afflicted woman, that heard of this mercy, and came to her May 12. She still remaining in Bed, very weak and spent, as beforesaid.

Woman.

Being asked how it was with her: she said; I cannot believe.

Its his work to give to believe, that died for sinners.

Woman.

Its not for me.

Its for chief of sinners, for Mary Magdalene that had seven Devil, .

Woman.

My heart will not be wrought upon.

Is anything too hard for God? It is Christ's work, and tis his Office, to work on hard hearts; stony hearts.

Woman.

I am oft afraid, I shall never be saved.

You are but afraid so. He saith, I will sustain thee, I will save thee, be not afraid . He puts under his everlasting arms. I thought, and said, it was impossible, that ever I should be saved. Yet that which was impossible with me, was not impossible with God : But I thought it was impossible with God.

Woman.

How long were you in that affliction?

Another answered, about four years.

Woman.

But not continually.

Yes continually. But this last half year, in terror day and night.

Woman.

I go to the means, but it is to no purpose.

So it was with me: I was worse by the means. What may your condition be?

Woman.

I have cursed thoughts of God continually. About three quarters of a year ago, when my husband was dead, I thought, What was become of his soul? and what would become of me? that had made him worse by my perverse words to him, when he was faulty: and one morning, after I was awake, I thought, the room was full of smoke; and suddenly a fire went in at my mouth, and went down hot into my belly, and there it went flutter, flutter. Then (said the woman ) I suddenly flew out of my bed, into the midst of the room; and a voice said within me, to my heart, Thou art damned, damned. I felt the smell of brimstone. Thus it began, and I thought the house was full of Devils. Then for six or seven weeks together, I never slept at all, I was so terrified, and have been out of hopes, ever since.

Jesus Chrisi came to dispossess the strong man armed, that kept the house, and to possess it himself : The Lyon of the Tribe of Judah, hath overcome that röaring Lyon, that seeks to devour you.

Woman.

I can see nothing but damnation.

I could see nothing but Hell, and wrath: I was as desperate, as ever was any: I said, I cared not whether I had mercy or no. I felt myself, soul and body in fire & brimstone already. If all the fire and brimstone in London, & all the pitch & tarre, should all be in one fire, and I walking in the midst of that fire; this was my condition. I beheld myself in hell locally; my terror was so great. And I thought, there was no other Hell, but that which I felt;

and therefore I sought to make away myself, and many ways attempted it: But God bath made me see my sin therein, and he ashamed; and mine iniquity, and be confounded.

Yet then I could wait no longer: and I said, if God will not save me, let him condemn me: and it terrified me after that I had said so. But were God's thoughts as my thoughts? were his thoughts ill towards me, because I thought so? Nay, God's thoughts were not my thoughts . God could withhold possession, and temptation, if he would; but he sees, its for his glory, and for the good of his, that you might love him the more; and that his glory might the more be seen in his delivering of you.

Its Christ's work to dispossess, where the strong man armed keeps the house. He doth not dispossess the soul that was not possessed, but the soul that was possessed: possessed with sin, and Satan, and corruption; that such should be brought from the captivity of Satan, to the glorious liberty of the sons of God. And then shall you see that this was good for you, & all things are for good to them that love God. I say not that you can love God: but he will give you a heart to love him .

Woman.

I have no experience, that ever he showed that mercy on me.

Sa.

He'l show mercy, that he may be feared . He'l show mercy to sinners; are not you a sinner, and ungodly?

Woman.

But not to me, I cannot believe it.

You cannot believe it: I could not believe, that he died for me. Paul saith I was a blasphemer, a persecutor, injurious, yet I obtained mercy, to be a pattern to others. (1 Tim. 1.) Had you seen my condition that I was in, as I saw it, you would believe, be may as soon show mercy on you, as show mercy to me: and sooner too, by far.

Woman.

I was and am still of a perverse spirit.

He sees you are so, and he heals such. None can heal but Christ, he is the Physician that heals che chiefest sinners freely. Put all sins into one, unbelief is the greatest, and Christ died for that sin; and tis Christ's gift to give faith, to one that hath no saith, to a heart full of nothing, but of sin, and corruption, and unbelief, till Christ give it to believe .

Woman.

I would believe, but I cannot.

Say as the man said, I believe, Lord help my unbelief : there was faith and unbelief mingled. Christ comes to give repentance, and remission of sins, and faith to believe it.

If you have Satan in you, Christ came to destroy the works of Satan: and its a work only for him to do it.

Woman.

I am in continual horror.

If he speak peace, who then can trouble? He will speak peace to his people, & then they shall not return to folly: and whats that folly, but to distrust God's mercy, and have hard thoughts of God; as if his anger & wrath should be forever? (Ps. 77.8.10.)

Woman.

Nothing will work on my heart.

No, not till Christ work: And if he work, who shall let him? His Counsel shall stand .

The woman being wished to forbear, because the other was so weak and spent; She would have the woman remember this: That Christ was carried into a wilderness, to be tempted. So he brings a soul into a wilderness of Temptation, and then will he succor them that are tempted. He saith, I will allure her, and bring her into the wilderness, and then speak peace to her. Ho. 2.14. That's God's time to do it; & then he saith to them, I will betroth thee to me forever; I will betroth thee to me. Its the wildered soul, the desolate soul, that he will betroth to him. Though you are now in the wilderness, never so sore stung of fiery Scorpions; yet there's a brazen Serpent for you, even you, to look upon, and be healed: or for such a one in your condition, never so sore stung. Is holden up, not for them that are not stung but for them that are sore stung, (Io. 3 14.)

May 16. She still being very weak in bed, was another Conference, she seeking to comfort one in deep despair that came to her. The woman being asked, how it was with her?

Woman.

I have slipped my time, (she had formerly told her more, of her sad condition by sin.)

Was it God's time to have done it? then Who could hinder him? Thou hast not called on me, O Jacob: thou hast been weary of me O Israel: thou hast wearied me with thine iniquities. But was their time past? Nay, the very next verse is; I even I am he, that blots out thy transgressions for mine own sake; not for thy sake, be thou ashamed; but for mine own sake [Isa. 43 end.] And in Jer 5. 11, 12. The house of Israel and of Judah, have belied the Lord, and said, it is not he neither shall evil come upon us. Yet Judah shall be saved, and Christ shall be the Lord their righteousness (Jer. 23. 6.)

For four year together have I been in as sad a condition as you can be in: and at least, it grow sadder and sadder still, till I came even at the brink of Hell: and Hell gates were wide open; sin and destruction set them open; then came Christ with his arms wide open for me, and pulled me thence.

Object.

Ther's no mercy to one in my condition.

I did not then apprehend there was any mercy for me. I never met with any, so carried on as I was. I reason'd with God, Why he would make me, to damn me? And why he made the Devil? Of late I thought, if I made away myself, there was an end of my misery, and that there was no God, no Heaven; and no Hell, but what I had already. This last, was ever since a month, or six weeks before Christmas, as they call it. I could not believe the Scripture, nor anything; (I had judged myself for these evils.) I see, nothing is too hard for God, that yet saves me, (Jer. 33. 17.) Then is no sin greater then unbelief. Yet Christ ayed for this also. Did not Christ say to his own Disciples, O fools and slow of heart to beleve? They were slow to believe, and yet Christ died for them, and was not slow to give them faith to believe. Whatever we suffer in Temptation, Christ suffered, being tempted, that he might partake in our sufferings. Ought not Christ to suffer, and to enter into Glory ?

It was Christ's way to glory. And are not you slow of hear to believe, that you must suffer many things, and then enter into glory?

When they knew Christ, then he vanished out of their sight, that they might more desire after him; and they went speedily to Jerusalem, and told of him. And when Christ came again to them, they were afraid ; and thought it was not he, but a delusion. (Luk. 24. So when Christ comes to your soul, "then you will fear, it is not Christ, it is but a delusion. It was the Disciples condition before you, those that did lie in the bosom of Christ continually.

Woman.

These are great works for some.

Who doth Christ work upon, but on stony hearts? His word is a fire and a hammer, to break and to melt it: and he will give them one heart, to fear him, and they shall not depart from him forever. Jer. 23. 29.

Woman.

I have no good at all.

What if you had all excellencies of wisdom, and gifts, and deeds? What were all this, without the loving kindness of God? And God delights in showing mercy and loving kindness, (Mic. 7.18.)

Woman.

God hath forsaken me.

Sa.

Ier. 51. 5. Israel hath not been forsaken, nor Judah, of his God. And what was Judah? treacherous Judah, back sliding, idolatrous, and what not? see Ier. 3 They played the harlot with many, and feared not God's judgments, committed adultery, and turned to God feinedly. Yet Judah is not forsaken of his God, he is his God: and not forsaken: though he said, He was forsaken, and his wound incurable: yet he was not forsaken. And Judah shall be saved for all that, in the Lord his God. For his own Names sake, he hath taken away their sins forever, and will remember them no more. He will remember his own free love; this is his own work, and this he delights in. He loved us, and washed us in his blood: that's she fountain where the Saints wash their Robes. Jer. 2. 13. My people have committed two evils, (my people, and two evils.) they forsake me, the fountain, (the fountain of our righteousness, and washing from sin;) and they dig Cisterns of their own, (their ownrighteousnes they would look on, and so do you,) which will hold no water: its a broken Cistern. This was as Adams fig. leaves. would cover but part of him, not cover all his nakedness: a skanty skirt, that will not cover all silthines. But the clothing that God made, will cover all. His fountain of living water is sufficient: and though they digd their Cisterns; yet he sets open this fountain for them.

Say not as they said, My wound is incurable, and refused to be comforted. No Pysician can heal such as are incurable, and that refuse healing: but God hath balm of Gilead, and hath healing there, and he pours in wine and oil, and heals them, that said, their wound was incurable, and refused to be healed.

Ier. 15. 18. Because its the outcasts of Israel, the poor outcast soul, that the Lord gathereth together, and that he healeth, (Psal. 147.2, 3.)

What think you of such a soul, as refuseth to be comforted?

Woman.

My heart quarrels against God.

Sa.

Who is any otherwise by nature? But what will a father do to his freward child, that quarrels against the father? As a father pitieth his child thats distempered, so the Lord pitieth such. The Lord is more abundaut in love and kindness, to such souls as Israel was, that were murmurers, backsliders, that called not on him, but were weary of him; as Ephraim, that fed on lies, unaccustomed to the yoke: yet God's bowels were turned within him for Ephraim : And he would not destroy him; For I am God and not man . Man, in his natural condition, is cruel to them that wrong him, and cannot forgive and be kind, to such: but he is God and not man,

Being weak and spent, for a farewell, would have the woman to remember, Ier. 46. two last. Fear not thou my servant Jacob: Jacob sinned, and feared; but he saith, Fear not thou my servant Jacob; Behold, I will save them from a far off: thou art a far off: yet behold. I will save thee: thou art in captivity, in bondage, I will deliver thee. Return, thou shalt return, `and none shall make thee afraid. He saith not, [no man shall make thee afraid,] but none; neither man, nor sin, nor Satan; Fear not, for I am with thee. Did he think so? No: Yet then God was with him. I will make a full end of all the Nations, (their enemies: so he'l make an end of all thine enemies, thy sins, and corruptions, and Satan;) but I will not make a full end of thee; but I will correct thee in measure: God will measure out what affliction, and in what manner, and for how long, as for ten days, and it shall not exceed; but he will make thee able to bear it.

O Earth, Earth, hear the Word. Man is a lamp of Earth, and cannot hear more then earth, till he cause to hear.

May 19. There came to visit her the Lady Renula, with M ^ris Fines, (wife to L. Say's eldest son, and M ^ris Brie. M ^r Sprig also; and the Relator &c.

One spake of her weakness; she said, My times are in his hands, and my fresh springs are in him; for refreshing weary souls, and replenishing empty sorrowful souls.

Lady.

You could not have hoped for such times formerly?

No, no more then the stones in the streets. I said many times, there's no hopes for me; it was impossible there should. But, these things that were impossible with me, and with men, they were possible with God. I found them so. (Iu. 18.27)

Lady.

How did your refreshings come in? was it by way of discourse, or in prayer, or how was it?

By vision of God, as he pleased to come in, filling me with admiration of the free love of God, to so vile a sinner, ( to M ^r . Sp. she after said, He revealed to me Jesus Christ, crucified for my sins; I saw it, and then I mournd over him, that bare them away into a land of forgetfulness.)

Lady.

Whether have you lost the memory of your former terrors, in your present joys?

God hath brought me from the power of darkness, into the kingdom of his dear Son: and I should not be so sensible of his mercy in this, if I should not remember the darkness I was in; therefore I do not desire to forget it.

Lady.

Now you have the inward teachings of the Spirit, whether do you less esteem the written word?

The word is the letter of the Spirit, and types out him; therefore not to be the less esteemed.

Lady.

If the Lord should recover you, whether do you think, you should frequent the Ordinances, in hearing the word as formerly you did?

God will dispose me to that, that shall be for his glory, and my good. But I look on Ordinances, as tokens of God's love to his people, and representations of Christ; that should neither be idolized, nor slighted; but they should be used, and God loved above them: (To M ^r . Sp. she said: As the spouse in the Canticles, sets out her beloved by similitudes of him: so are Ordinances, similitudes of him, by which he sets out himself to us, for our good. If Jesus Christ himself should preach to the soul every day, and give not out of himself, the Ordinance would be empty to it But he comes in to his people in Ordinances, and there he fills the empty soul with good things.)

Lady.

Whether do you not desire to live, to declare the great mercy that God hath expressed to you?

I desire nothing but his will, which doth order all things to his own glory, and his Creatures good.

Lady

whether have you thoughts of the Church of God, and of the condition it is in, in the parts that you know?

I wish with Paul, if it were possible, that all Israel might be sau'd.

M ^ris Bri.

Do you not wish that all differences were composed and made up among the Saints?

Answ.

Yes.

Lady.

What means do you think would be most effectual to compose them?

The beholding a reconciled God, seen by all: God was in Christ, reconciling the world to himself. There is need of such a days-man as Christ, to reconcile the world to God. Her face being covered as daily. It used to be since April 6 ) one spake of the great weakness of her eyes.

Ans.

Christ hath done a great miracle upon me: he hath made the blind to see, and the deaf to hear, and the damb to speak; he hath done it upon many, and he hath done all upon one poor wretch: [Formerly her self was slow of speech, that now hath such freedom; speaking as with a new tongue.]

M ^r Sp.

Do you think to have it always day with you?

Ans.

I know there may be clouds, that the soul cannot so apprehend the light of God's countenance: at David said, Restore to me the joy of thy salvation : and why hidest thou thy face from me? But Christ the Sun of righteousness will arise again. He will break through all these things. My times, and my refreshings are in God's hands to refresh the weary soul; which he will do freely.

M ^r Sp.

I would be glad to hear, which way the Lord came in to refresh you?

Ans.

It was revealed to me, that Christ was crucified for me, even for me, the chiefest of sinners. I never had a glimpse of Christ before; and then I admired him. I saw it plainly. My greatest sin was unbelief; and I saw I was in unbelief, and that the wrath of God abode upon me; I was damned already. And not for anything in me, but when unworthiness was in me, for his own worthiness, even for his own Names sake, that he forgave all my sins. His Name is Merciful, Gracious, long suffering, &c [Exo. 34 67,]

M ^r Sp.

What counsel would you give to one in that condition of darkness.

To wait on God, that hids himself. (Isa 8. 17.) My temptations were the saddest of any: to believe there was no God, nor Heaven, nor Hell, but what I felt: my soul remained in terror continually.

M ^r Sp.

You knew the Scriptures before, that comfort you now: wherein then is your comfort? Whats the difference?

The Letter did but kill, it could not comfort, but God hath refreshed me in his love. God was the same to me in his love formerly, that he is now. But in his fullness of time, he manifested that, which was before. I do not believe that he hated me before; and loved me after: but all my affliction, was in his love, and very faithfulness. The glory of God doth as much appear, in supporting a soul under terror, as in delivering it out of terror. Its said in Isai. 24. 16. Glorify God in the fires; Though the soul sees it not then, yet when the Lord brings it out, then he sees that God did glorify himself in the afffliction.

Question.

What do you think of the POWRINGS out of his spirit in the last days?

S. Ans.

The Name of Christ is poured forth by the spirit on his people, and will be still, and thereby we love him, when he hath shown that love to us, and drawn us.

Question.

we have some drops of his spirit now, but are the powrings out now? (Act. 2.17.31 38.)

S. Ans.

There are many that love him now and why do they love him? its not said, because of some Drops; but because thy name is Ointment poured out: Therefore it is that any soul loves him. (Cant. 1. 3.)

Quest.

But do you not think there will be a time, when God will pour out more of his Spirit upon his sons and daughters, then now is usual?

S. Ans.

Though his love is poured out into the hearts of his people by the spirit now, or else we could not love him; yet this is personal, to a few: but I do verily believe, it will be more general to many, and in a greater measure. This is but a taste now of what shall be.

M ^r . Spr.

Do you take no food?

S. Ans.

Yes, I feed on Jesus Christ, he is my daily food, he feeds me with himself: and he is full of satisfaction. ( John. 6. 35. 51. 55.)

M. Spr.

But I speak of bodily food: Do you think its no temptation on you to forbear bodily food?

S. Ans.

No. I would eat if I could, but I cannot

If I try, it makes me worse. His word is my meat and delight.

In my trouble, I oft could not eat, he fed me with bitterness and worm wood ; I sed on terror, that was my meat: and now the Lord makes answerable to it, his feeding me now with promises, this marrow and fatness: he refresheth me continually with his love, which is better then wine May 21. One asked her, Do you sleep?

These three nights I slept not till three of the clock. but I lie still, I stir not, but am content, and thats better.

Quest.

How is that better?

S. Ans.

Content is better then abundance: is it not? And Christ is never idle, he is always doing somewhat in the soul.

One speaking of hopes of her life.

S. Ans.

To be willing to live, is the hardest lesson to me: It were best for me to be with Christ Yet its a more blessed thing to give, then to receive : to be doing God's work, then receiving the reward: and I am content.

May 21. Relat. Quest. whether is Faith the Condition of the NEW COVENANT?

S. Ans.

There's no Condition in the New Covenant; its the freeness of his love, and greatness of his compassion, that under takes all, when the Creature is in the blood ; as in Ezek. 16. There's nothing in the Creature to move him, but sin, and disobedience, and unthankfulness. [

So M ^r . Slater's Catec. Of the TWO Covenants, showeth. The Matter is, sure mercies, sweet promises, have all in Christ Yea, and in him Amen: to give a new heart, to know him, to write his Law, put his fear into us, cause us to walk in his Statutes, forgive our inquiries, — to be our God, and make us his people, ( Ezek. 36. 26. Ier. 31. 31. Isa. 55. 3. 2 Cor. 1. 20. Quest. What's required of such as are taken into this Covenant? A. Nothing but what is given to them: he required that men believe and repent: but its freely given to them so to do: Mans duty is the matter of the promise, as well as God's mercy, (1 Cor. 2. 12. Eph. 2. 8, Phil. 1. 29. Act 5. 31.)— When we are required to believe, repent and turn to God, We are not to seek strength in ourselves, but to search into the Covenant and turn the promise into prayer. As Repent, Act. 17. 30. The Covenant is, Christ shall give Repentance, Act. 5. 31. Pray therefore ; Turn thou me, and I shall be turned, Ier. 31. 18

]

Rel. Qu.

About the LAW. Is there now any use of the Law to us?

Ans.

There is use of the Law: the Law is holy, and the Command is holy, and just, and good, ^f the Law is just, for it shows with Creature what it should do, and what it cannot do without the power of God. There's the Creatures inability, and the power of God ^f . R. 7 12.

Christ is the end of the Law for Righteousness, to very one that believes. Ro. 10. 4. Believers can look on Christ in all things, and above all things. All the Commands are done and kept in believing in the Lord Jesus, who hath done and undergone all for believers. The soul that breaks one of them, breaks them all: the soul that keeps one, keeps all. The Lord Commands the soul to do great works, and good works: And he works in them to will and to work. Phi. 2. 13. And this is his work, that they believe in Christ. The Law saith, Do this and live. The Gospel saith, Believe and live. ( Ro. 10. 56. S. ) H. G. The Law was our Schoolmaster to bring us to Christ.

Sa. Ans.

The Law was a Schoolmaster; by types it led out to Christ; But when Christ come, and saith is come, we are no longer under that Schoolmaster, and Tutor, and Governor, and rudiments, when the fullness of time is come (*Gal. 3.24.25. Greek. Gal. 4 1,2,3 4 5.)

Relat.

Have Believers no need of the Law? The Apostle exhorts believers to the DVTIES of the first and second Table of the Law.

Sa. Ans.

I believe the best Saints that are, have need of the Word, of the Law and Gospel, of the Exhortation; because there's want in them; many things they see not, and are slow too . When one knows Christ in the Gospel of Christ, its the special way to lead them on to the things of the Law . Where faith is, there's love to God and his will, and such cannot but be careful to maintain good works; and till then, they can never observe the end of the Law, nor do any good works, works that please God.

Quest.

Is the Law of no use then to unbelievers?

S. Ans.

Yes It calls for that they cannot do, and gives no power to do: And it curseth them for not doing it. It shows them, they perish without Christ, that they may cry, save Master, we perish. And none can redeem them from the Curse, but Christ . and he hath redeemed them already by his death on the Cross, but it wants manifesting to them , till the fullness of time come, and then they see it. The further one looks into the Law, the more one is plunged into the depths; it wounds it the more; its rather the worse then the better. And then's the time when none can heal but Christ, that came to heal wounded souls , and that is Christ's time to heal. ( May 24. Because she had said, Its a living active Christ, in a dead passive creature, that makes it act. One asked her whether every man should not use his endeavor about spiritual things or duties

S. Ans.

(Besides what was before said Pag 64. wishing one that couldnot pray, Go and say Take away all iniquity. Say it, because God bids you she added,) Christ is the light and life of the world, and the only way to the Father , in whom and in him alone he is well pleased , and its he only make us acceptable: Yet we must look at God's will, that we should pray, and wait on him in his ways: for he saith blessed is he that waiteth for him . Not that we can wait, by a power of our own; but he, that saith there first: Therefore will the Lord wait, that he may be gracious to you; he draws, and gives a power to wait on him, and to pray; and he comes in, when he hath waited the sutest time. When Daniel set himself to pray, the Lord came into him, whilst he was speaking in prayer. When Peter had gone apart to pray, and when Paul prayed in the Temple, then the Lord came into them. And, as many as went immediately to Christ were healed; So of those that went to the pool as to an Ordinance, at certain seasons; some were healed. And there Christ healed the man that had an infirmity 38 years, and had waited long, and had no help; at last Christ healed him there. When Simon Magus was in the gall of bitterness, Peter bid him pray ^t . He that careth for Sparrowes, and hears the Ravens when they cry, will hear poor souls that pray.

Obj.

Without faith, its impossible to please God.

Ans.

It is so: and unless such believe that God is, and that he is a rewarder of them that diligently seek him they will not else come to him ^t . But such faith, may lead to him (Heb. 11. 6 • )

Quest.

What judge you about GENERALL REDEMPTION, (and the consequence thereof, FREE-WILL, FALLING AWAY, &c.) Seeing you hold out to all that come troubled to you, that Christ hath redeemed them; and that it only wants manifestation to themselves ?

Answer.

The Gospel is to be held out to all the world, to the chiefest of sinners: And this is Gospel: That Christ was sent of God to them, to turn them all from their sins, and to justify and Pardon them; and to give peace to them that are a far off, and that God is not willing that any should perish, but that all should repent and live. God's willingness to reconcile the world to himself, it to be held out to all. And those that I thus speak to, are afflicted: and affliction is the portion of those that he loves. And he had loved such, and Christ had redeemed them, whilst they were in the furnace of affliction, though they knew it not: it only wanted the manifestation to them: and when this fullness of time is to draw them, it is not because God then began to love them, but he loved them with an everlasting love: therefore it is that in tender mercy he draws any souls. (Jer. 31. 3) There is his free choice; and his mighty power in drawing such as were dead in sins; which no power of man could do: none can come to Christ: except the Father draw him , And having loved his own, he loves them to the end ; and none can pull them out of his Fathers hand. Who shall separate us from this loves ? neither men, nor sin, nor Satan.

Another added as follows:

1. Jesus Christ saith, Preach the Gospel to every creature: say, Peace be to this House. Thus the Disciples did to the worst: Peter, Act. 3. 26. Paul, 1 Cor. 15. 1. 3, 4. with 1 Cor. 6. 9-11. Chap. 2. 2. Hereby they received the Spirit, Gal. 3.5. 2 Pet. 1.4. Which alone convinceth effectually of sin, righteousness, and judgment, Job 16. 8. and melts the hard heart, Zach. 12. 10. Isa. 53. 5. (God's choice was not used to be preached to all, but for the comfort of them that knew they believed, Eph. 1. 3, 4. 2 Tim. 1. 9.) In preaching of the Gospel, light, motion, and power goes out to all: which men resist: and such are destroyed, not because they could not believe; but because they resist, and will not obey; and so die: Act. 7. 51. Luk. 13. 34. Ezek. 33. 11. Hos. 13. 9.
2. All the Redemption or freedom that all have, from temporal, and from hellish torments at present; and all the good to heart, body or state, that they enjoy; all is by the redemption of Jesus Christ; who saveth all, (both) men, (and beasts: ) especially them that believe; thus, 1 Tim. 4. 10. Psal. 36. 6.
3. The time must be, when every promise of God must be fulfilled, John. 10. 35. Mat. 5.17, 18. And therefore, the time cometh, when in the seed of Abraham, (that is, in Jesus Christ,) all the Nations, kindreds, families, people of the earth, (even to the ends, or utmost corners thereof,) shall be blessed. When the stone in Daniel, that smites the feet of the mighty image, shall become a MOVNTAIN, and fill the whole earth. Then the kingdom, and dominion, and greatness of the kingdom under the whole Heaven, shall be given to the Saints of the most High; whose kingdom is forever, or for an age; and all Dominions, (of Rulers, all Kings and people, shall serve and obey him. This was never yet fulfilled and therefore we may rejoice, that as God is true, as this shall be performed.

H. G.

Whether doth the Lord at any time PUNISH or chasten his people FOR SIN

S. Ans.

He saith; For this cause some are sick and weak among you . But I cannot call it a punishment for sin to his people; for Christ hath paid their debt already, and bare their sin into land of forgetfulness. Thou forgavest the punishment of my sin. If the punishment for the least sin were taken away, it would press them down to Hell: and then what would their greatest sin do? But Christ hath satisfied, to take away the punishment.

But yet he hath fatherly chastisements for them. For whom he loves he chastens: What son is he whom the Father chastens not ? He chastens them to love, and they see it, and that makes them sorry for sin as sin; or else they would never be sorry for sin as sin, but that they see his love. Its his love, that he will correct them, and then he deals with them, as with one of his own. It is in love, what ever he doth to his, in all afflictions; though the soul may not see it, till afterwards: For, All things are for good to his people.

May 26. 1647. There came to her a wife that being past her reckoning, thought her Pangs of Travel were come upon her: but (as she said) those being as nothing to the pangs and terrors her soul was in; having been with M ^ris Sarah before, she came now running to her; bewailing that in this her extremity she had no God to go unto.

M ^ris Sarah's eyes that had been so very ill, by her cruel beating them, (and by oft bruising her head against walls, in her terrors, to have beat out her brains, ) being now somewhat better, beheld the sadded woman coming in, and had presently cast in, a word to speak to her; which was this: Judah shall be saved, and Jerusalem shall dwell safely and who were more sinful then they? Yet God hath made a promise to them. If you were as bad, (as you are as bad by nature,) yet look upon that promise, which was cast upon me, as you came in; That you, even you shall be saved, and dwell safely, under the shadow and protection of the Almighty; which is a safe shelter indeed, from what storms soever they be. Those sins, that are crimson-sins, and of a scarlet die; yet God hath pardoned doubtless, he hath loved you freely, and pardoned you not for anything in you, but for his Name sake. You say, you are weary of your sins, and you desire nothing but Christ: Therefore the promise is to you.

Woman mourning said,

[as the Relator then wrote it,] I am in unbelief.

S. Ans.

Its rather a token you have some Faith though you see it not. The Corn that is sown in the Ground, is first hid, & then the blade and growth appears. You are wounded: its not you that wound yourself; but he saith, I wound and I heal. Therefore he saith to one , Go in Peace, thy faith hath made thee whole: Thou believest I can heal thee. This faith in me, hath made thee whole. So for you though yet you see it not; you believe Christ can heal you; Desire he would but speak the word, and manifest it to your soul.

Another asked her, Do you think Christ is willing you should believe?

Woman.

Yea, But there are Mountains in the way.

Behold he comes leaping over the Mountain of Opposition that are in the way.

Woman.

If the world knew the worth of the glimpse of faith, they would prize it, who cannot believe.

Quest. What is faith?

A believing, Christ is a sure and strong Rock and refuge to fly too Had it not before him, you had been swallowed up. Would you rest on our own righteousness? on anything in you?

Woman.

I am much looking at that, to feel something in me.

That's but filthy rags : and he will take them away, and clothe you with change of raiment : as Josephs rags were taken away, and he was clothed with better raiment.

Woman.

When I was troubled about my condition, about ten years ago, one day as I mused, a voice said plainly to me; Marie, thou shalt die, and live again: and thou shalt glorify God greatly. Thy ways are not my ways; nor thy thoughts my thoughts. This filled me with joy unspeakable; and I said; Yea Lord, let it be as thou wilt. I was persuaded, it was an Answer from God: Then I could not, but send for my friends, that they might hear what God had done for me ; and I told them of this. Then I presumed that I had faith : and I looked, that God would do great things for me, that he had thus spoken to me, and done so much for me. I was carried on thus for a time. But after this, I was led to sin again: and I feared I should sin: and I said, Lord, shall I sin again? it went to my heart. The voice answered me; Though thou do, thy sins are buried in the bottom of the Sea: They are bound in a bundle, and cast into the depth of the Sea. I was not led to sin by this. But I forgot God's goodness, and I fell into sin by little and little: and now I have been a backslider.

Here are backslidings. He saith, I have seen his ways, and I will heal him, and restore comforts to him. I will heal their backslidings, I will love them freely mind that. What joy is it to a Shepherd, when he finds a lost sheep? more joy, then over all the rest. You are the lost sheep: he will joy over you .

Woman.

Legions of sins are before me.

Legions of Devils were within me, not before me; but within me; Yet he hath clothed me, and c •• out Legion. (Mat. 8. end. ) Who came Christ for? Was it for the righteous ? You are an alien, without God without Covenant of promise.

Woman.

I am confident, that's my case.

God draws such souls: Christ died to reconcile such souls: the Spirit ties both ends together, he tied them and Christ together, uniting them to Christ. So did he with those Ephesians, They were dead in sin and trespasses, strangers from God, without God, far off, twain; but these had he made near. Such does God draw, and makes up the breaches. See the condition they were in, Eph. 2. 12. and Hosea, the first and second Chapters. He said, They are not my people and then it shall be said, now they are the children of the living God. Hos. 1. 12. Before not people, as now, not only people, but children: before they were dead people; now they are living children: the living God, gives them new life. They have life from God that they may live to God. In Ephes. 2. You that were dead, hath he quickened; and by Grace ye are saved through Faith—not of works, least any should boast. We would boast, if we did anything in it. He works, Faith, and he builds up still: he builds higher and higher, till his work be finished: We are his workmanship.

Woman.

My condition is very dangerous and hopeless.

How is it ?

Woman.

I have an evil heart of unbelief, in departing from God.

Have you departed from him? then you had him. How have you departed from him, if you never had him?

Woman.

I never had him.

What if now you shall have him? and you be a child? not only a servant, but a child, an heir of God?

Woman.

I should admire it.

He will show mercy to be admired. He will come and be admired in his Saints that believe . He raiseth up a bondslave, to be with him in glory. It is a faithful saying, though the soul doubt of it: and its worthy of all acceptation: though the soul would not accept it; That Jesus Christ came to save the chiefest of sinners . The Lord will deliver you of two Burthens; the burden of sin, and your other burden also. Your extremity, is God's opportunity. In him Judah shall be saved.

Woman.

In my prosperity, a poor woman came to me, that had her son in slavery; and she begged of me to give her somewhat towards her son's release. But I thought, all was little enough for myself: my sister gave her somewhat; but I would give her nothing: the woman wept. And now I think on my unmercifulnes, when now my soul is in slavery myself: his slavery is nothing to mine.

Christ came to deliver them that are captives and bond-slaves , not them that are at liberty: The Son makes free , not them that were free, but them that were in bondage.

Woman.

I am without hope of mercy, and my heart fails, and gives up all.

Some refused to be comforted, and would not be healed: yet he heals them. He looks after the Outcasts , that none look after.

Woman.

That's my case.

Yet there was mercy for them; and why is this written, but for our instruction and comfort , that we might have hope.

Woman.

Not one word will abide with me, thats spoken.

The time was not yet come. For in the appointed time, it will surely speak, and not lie: it will speak truth, and peace, lasting peace, abundant mercy and love. Wait therefore for that time: The Name of God is to be Preached and Proclaim'd: that he is gracious to graceless ones; and merciful to miserable ones; and longsuffering, and abundant in goodness and truth , to them that have abundance of sin; and he would that repentance and remission of sins, should be published in his Name . When he gives you a glimpse of his love, you are apt to bely the Lord, as Judah did, and to say, it is not he: unless it comes with a full persuasion to you: yet this hindered not the Lord's coming in and healing them. Though (not a person, but) the Land was filled with sin, against the Holy One of Israel: yet Israel hath not been forsaken : He said, I am forsaken, and not only forsaken, but forgotten: Zion said so, and Israel said so; yet he is not forsaken.

For a farewell, she said, Go, and Believe, the Lord Jesus makes you whole: and so Go in peace, believing its Christ must make you whole, and none else.

May 28. A maid in deep despair came to her. [The Relator being present, writ then also.] After other expressions, the Maid said as followeth.

Maid.

It hath been sad with me, since it was said to me; Repentance is hid from thine eyes: and woe unto them, when they depart from the living God.

S. Ans.

The Lord saith, I will put my fear in their hearts, that they shall not depart from me

Maid.

But I have departed from him, therefore I am none of his people.

There (saith he) where it was said , They are not my people: there it shall be said, they are the children of God.

Maid.

I am without God, an enemy to him.

Well, let it be so, you are without God in the world, a stranger, an enemy: yet such hath he reconciled by the death of his Son : all the want is, you cannot see it so.

Maid.

I am far off from him.

He gives peace, peace, to them that are far off.

Maid.

I had a great deal of light; and I departed from it.

So did Judah; they departed from the living God, and went to dead Idol God's: yet he would marry them.

Maid.

I have done so.

So did they before you, and yet he married them.

Maid.

But I have rejected him.

You can do nothing else, but reject him: but your greatest rejecting is, to reject a promise from God when he holds one out to you; then you say, it is not to me. Thus I find, as you do, in rejecting promises: and that was my greatest sin.

Maid.

Your sin was not like mine.

No sin was like mine, as I judged. Mine was against such light, that I judged I had sinned against the Holy Ghost.

Maid.

That word terrifies me, that was said to me, Repentance is hid from thine eyes.

That word when I read it, I was ready to tear it out of my book, There were three other Scriptures that were terrible to me. He that believes not is condemned already, was one: Another was, He that believeth not the Son, the wrath of God abides on him . A third was, He that made them, will not have mercy on them : no mercy, none at all. But above all, this ; Repentance is hid from mine eyes.

Maid.

Was it so with you? and then said, The Discoveries of Christ, and promises, are more terrible to me, then the curses of the Law.

Sometimes it was so with me; salvation was turned into condemnation to me: promises that were never so sweet, were terrible to me.

Maid.

When he would have healed me, I resisted, and would not.

Who hath resisted his will? Here is God's mercy to you, that by his Spirit he hath convinced you of sin; when you might have gone without any sight of it.

Maid.

I have not the light of it.

You see, you are in darkness: Christ came to be light to them that are in darkness . Christ would not unbottome you of yourself, but to bottom you on himself .

Maid.

He that overcometh, to him will he give to sit on his Throne , and to eat of the hidden Manna ? One may go far, and not overcome. He that endures to the end, shall be saved : but I fear, I shall not.

He saith, fear not, nor be dismayed: for the battle is not yours, but the Lord's: you lie down in your shame, but he is your strength, your all in all.

Maid.

Better never to have known the Truth, and holy Command, then having known it, to depart , as I have departed.

All the Scriptures you bring, are to bring you off from your sandy foundation; you would build on something you would find in yourself, and feed on husks, your prodigals portion : Christ is unbottoming you of your own righteousness , and of all evil, to make known himself, & his righteousness to you: and to set you on that Rock, that is higher then you.

Maid.

Not one glimmering light of him have I.

S. Ans.

Had you these eight years enjoyed such light and comforts as you would have had, you would have rested in them. But God would not have you rest short of himself .

Maid.

I have sinned against all the means and light he hath given me.

You will the more prize his mercy, and the more love him, when you shall see his love to you, notwithstanding all this .

Maid.

Judas after his sin, he repented: I have not so much as he had.

He had a natural Repentance: you wait for Repentance from Christ , who is sent to give Repentance to them that have no Repentance.

Maid.

I have sinned with Judas ; But he saith, Return ; And I have not returned.

Doth he expect they should return in their own strength? No. But he turns them, and they are turned . Judah was given over to reproach, and to treachery, and whoredom, and to all manner of sin: Their sins were such, as could not be numbered: They would none of God, but were weary of him : yet he would not forsake them ; but would have mercy on them, and would love them freely, and would forgive them, and blot out their sins, for his own sake ; that they might not boast of their own righteousness : but glory in the Lord only.

Maid.

I go on in sin: and what hope for such?

Ephraim feeds on wind; and the house of Israel cōpisseth him about with lies: yet they were not destroyed: for his bowels were turned for Ephraim, Hos. 11.8.

Maid.

If I eat, I am terrified for it.

If I did eat, I was terrified for it. Sometimes I durst not drink in a whole week together: because I judged, it was a Cup of Devils , and I drank to Devils, if I drank: and if I did eat, I thought I did eat my own damnation.

Maid.

I would fain be out of this life, that I might have an end.

Would you be sooner in Hell? Is not that worse?

Maid.

I would be sitting alone, and musing, and not work: because I have no hope.

Quest.

When you work not, have you no thoughts?

Maid.

Yes, thoughts of sin, and of misery.

Then tis better for you to be employed in business : Forels, the enemy hath more advantage: And specially because God bids you labor the thing that is good .

Maid.

I shall never be comforted: I am cast out.

Because thou sayest, my pain is perpetual, my wound is incurable : and are called an Out-cast: therefore the Lord will cure thee: The Lord gathereth the outcasts of Israel.

Maid.

Once that promise was sweet to me; The mountains shall depart, and the hills shall be removed: but my kindness shall not depart from thee, nor shall the Covenant of my peace be removed, saith the LORD that hath mercy on thee Then God was sweet to me, and his people sweet; I could have laid my hand under their feet. But now, mercy is departed, and all is nothing.

Hath God said, It shall not depart, and will you say, it shall depart? Mountains of sin and corruption shall depart; but he will not depart. The Father draws the soul to his Son: the Son receives it; the Blessed Spirit unites it, and makes of two, one; He knits the knot in the middle, and ties these two ends together. Christ and the soul: which knot of love, none can untie .

Maid.

God might say, What could I have done more for thee, then I have done ? and yet I have thus revolted from him.

Israel not only revolted, but deeply revolted. Yet he saith, Return, and he turns them.

He gathereth, not only Israel in general; but the Out-casts of Israel: the skirts and rags of them. I will tell you what your state is. You are as a man, that's taken from his house, where was some light; and is put in Ludgate, and put in a dungeon, where he hath no light.

If one comes from the King with a pardon, and to call such a one to the Kings Palace, where the light is greater and more glorious, then that he had before: how will he then admire it? And will not you admire it, if the great King shall do thus with you, that are now in a dark dungeon? If he work, who shall let him? his pleasure is, to raise up one from a dungeon of darkness, and to bring such to his marvelous light : From a dunghill; from sin, and corruption, and the Devil; to sit with Princes ; to give them a kingdom. Fear not little flock , its your Fathers good pleasure to give you a kingdom.

Maid.

If I were of that flock, I might have hope.

Other sheep I have, that are not of this fold: them will I bring to the Sheepsold, and they shall hear my voice: and there shall be one fold, and one Shepherd .

Maid.

The Lord strove with me, and I resisted.

If the Lord pass over all this, your soul and body will melt: you will be overcome with this goodness of his, to be his forever. Its the Son that must make you free, and then you shall be free indeed .

Maid.

But I have fin'd against such great light: and what will my end be?

What think you of Peter that so denied Christ? Was not be on the mountain with Christ, and saw his glory ? did not he see light? & yet how sinned he against it? when be both denied Christ, and forswear him . And yet what love showed Christ to him after all this? Tell my Disciples, and tell Peter that I am risen . I was much troubled with the Parable of the foolish Virgins: It was terrible to me. But yet see what was there? At midnight there was a great cry; Behold the Bridegroom cometh, go forth to meet him : So when it is the darkest time with you, you are called to go forth to meet him.

Maid.

I think as I go in the streets, something will fall on my head, and will kill me.

When I went in the streets, I thought the Earth would open, and swallow me up. You cannot reckon up the thing, but I was troubled with it.

Maid.

I desire I might be a warning to all, to beware by my example, of sinning against light, as I have done, & brought all this misery on me.

It may be this is it the Lord aims at, in his hiding himself from you: that you may be for a warning: & yet he may return to you again .

Maid.

If I had hearkened, then my peace should have been as a river, and my righteousness should go before me.

Be you ashamed, and confounded, that you have so neglected him: and if he will show his love to you, notwithstanding all this, how will you admire him?

Maid.

Ay, as much as any. I should have as much cause to admire him, as ever had any.

Therefore he will be gracious, that he may be exalted .

Maid.

If I could weep day and night, I should find more ease; but I cannot.

What if you could? yet the Law and all your doings are weak; but you have not what you would in yourself, that you may not rest short of Christ. You would not else so desire the riches of Grace to such a one. Are you not weary and sorrowful?

Maid.

I am.

He will satiate the weary soul: and he will replenish the sorrowful soul.

The maid having further heard by this Gentlewoman, how sad her condition had been; and that yet the Lord had been so gracious to her, she said: Mine was not sadder then yours hath been: but only that I had sinned against greater light. How long were you in that sad condition?

Four years and above, since I was little more then eleven years old: But the last half year and above before the Lord delivered me, I was full of terror night and day; and at last, I had no rest at all, being violently tempted against my life.

Maid.

Then I may have some hope that the Lord may deliver me; because I have not been above two months so violently troubled.

May 31. Being Monday, came to her the Lady Willoughbie of Parham, with D ^r Coxe Physician, and M ^r s Cox ; M ^r and M ^r s Adderley, of the Charter-house, &c.

Having heard of her great comforts, Dr. Cox put several Questions to her; Which with her Answers, were to this effect.

1. D ^r Cox.

Some say of your Comfort, that it is but a Delusion, some say it is not.

How do you know tis no Delusion?

S. Ans.

You cannot know what my comforts are except you knew what my terrors were: But I believe, the Lord did not keep me in them, and carry me through them, and deliver me from them, ( not foon one, but from all my fears, ) and give me comfort to delude me with his comfort. For nothing could satisfy in those Terrors, but Christ; therefore it is apparent that it is Christ; because nothing else could do it to free me from one of my terrors; much less to free me from all. Could anything keep me from such great temptations, but the power of God? (then she told of some of her Temptations. )

How know you it was the power of God?

Ans.

Because it was the bare arm of God that brought salvation to me: (Isa. 59.16.) nothing else could, and nothing else did it. I went about seeking rest, and could sinned none, till he gave me rest.

How know you this working in you, is the Spirit of God?

Where the Spirit of God is, there is liberty he sets the soul at liberty, that was in bondage; for I was in bondage. The other is a Spirit of Error; this is the Spirit of Truth: the other is the Spirit of darkness, this is the Spirit of light. This is the Spirit of Truth, and not of Error, because he leads the soul into all Truth: and he set me at liberty, that I am no under the Law, but under Grace .

2. Q.

How, or in what sense are you not under the Law?

S. Ans.

Because the Spirit of life in Christ Jesus, hath made me free from the law of sin, and of death. For what the Law could not do, being weak, &c. (Rom. 8. 2. 3.) It was weak to pardon my sin, and to carry it into the land of forgetfulness: therefore God sending his Son — condemns sin, and saves the sinner: even me, the chiefest of sinners.

3. Q.

Whether have you SIN in you?

Yes; a thorn in the flesh ( as Paul had, ) to humble me: but not to condemn me. (2 Cor. 12. 7.)

Whether do you think that others judge of your condition now, that it is but in hypocrisy?

They that saw, or knew me in my Terrors, when I could not be ruled; might well know, that nothing but the Peace of God, which passeth all understanding, could so rule me, which was as Ephraim, an untamed heifer, (Phil. 4.7. Ier. 31.18. (she spake this very low.)

4. Q.

Why do you speak no louder? are you weaker with your joys, then you were with your Terrors?

Ans.

I had more cause in my Terrors, when I abused my body; but I never felt it, till now. I beat my head oft against the wall; and took my flesh in my teeth: and the more and ofter I did it, the less I felt it. And when I had an opportunity against my life, and did not take it; then I beat myself for it most of all, because it took not effect: Or if I spake anything that was offensive to any with me, or did that I should not; when it was brought to mind afterward, then I abused my body for it, most of all. And that I did so then, is the cause why I lie here now. For now that he hath brought me to myself, now I feel it. He did not only bring my soul to hell, and brought it back again; but my body to the grave, that he might raise it up again if he see it good. (1 Sam. 2.6,7.)

5. Qu.

Why do you not eat? Why do they now get things for you, that you may rise again?

Ans.

I do eat. But its meat to eat, that the world knows not off; but those that taste of it: His words were found, and I did eat them. His words are the joy, and rejoicing of my heart; his words of mercy, and love, and joy in the holy Ghost; which sill an empty soul indeed, as I was: which is meat indeed, both to soul and body at the present.

Qu.

Whether do you not refuse the creatures our of temptation?

An.

No, for I would eat, if I could: my stomach was then sild with terror that I could not eat; & now with joy. If I could, I would take the Creatures; but for the present I cannot: But if he see it best for his glory, and my good, I wait for a power from him for this, as well as for the rest that he hath done for me for I know that all power is in his hand, and all my times are in his hand: therefore I desire to wait on him.

Whether could you endure to be mocked and skoff'd, and jeered at in the world? if some should say, This is she that was mad, or that counterfeited could you endure it?

Ans.

Its no more then my Lord and Master was before me: They said, he was mad, and had a Devil: and the Soldiers mocked him. Let me undergo the uttermost, I do but follow his steps. And if I will be one of Christ's, I must do so . He suffered it, but for such a one as I, though he was the Son of God; yet he made himself of no reputation , And what was it for? but to die for me the the chiefest of sinners, that I might live to have life from him, that I might live to him .

7. Q.

Whether could you be content with Christ alone now, and take no comfort in anything in the world, but be satisfied with him alone?

Ans.

Yes, very well: for he is a satisfying Christ: for having him, I have enough, I have all things. Therefore I desire not to look after pleasures in the world, for I have enough in him . For he is full of satisfaction: and I have tasted of that fullness, Grace for Gr..ce.

8. Q.

Whether do you love God now, more then ever you did before?

Ans.

I know not that ever I loved him at all before: For I had no love at all , neither to the Creator, nor to the creature: for all were enemies. All the sight of God I had then, was, that he was an enemy. I saw no excellency, nor beauty, nor comeliness in him to be desired at all.

It must be one that hath attained to great love, that can love a deformed creature. God is LOVE itself : yet he is pleased to look on such a deformed creature as I; none more then I. Therefore he shows tis great love indeed, that he loved me withal. Therefore I love him with the same love, that he loved me first.

I was a child of wrath, dead in trespasses and sins; a stranger from the Covenant of promise; without God, without hope; far off from God; indeed I was an enemy to God. Yet he was pleased to reconcile enemies: therefore its free love, to love such a one; to quicken such a one; to bring such a one near, that was so far off.

It was love indeed, that made me love him. It was this, that made me to see a beauty and excellency in him; which made me love him above ten thousand worlds: if all the glory of them were in one, and given to me, I see more to besired in him, in the least glimpse of him, then in them all.

Therefore I look on him above them all. When I saw him as an enemy to me, I could not love him: But now I see him a reconciled God in Jesus Christ to such an enemy as I, even I the chiefest of sinners; Which constrains me to love him. (2 Cor. 5. 14.)

9. Q.

Whether do you PRAY?

Ans.

I do pray: but tis that the Lord would give submission to his will. As long as I am in the body, I have cause to pray. I cannot forget to pray for troubled souls, that come hither to me. But for myself, my chiefest work is now to PRAISE the Lord, for what he hath done to my soul. For Praises wait for God in Zion: And for what waits it? but for Zion's deliverance from her hand bondage. Zion was a Wilderness, desolate, forsaken, forgotten of God for the present, in her own apprehension. And when God is pleased in fullness of time to manifest himself, and to show his love to Zion freely, and to marry her to himself, (such a one as I was,) and to establish Zion on a sure foundation, that is, upon himself: that though the mountains and hills depart, yet his loving kindness shall not depart: then PRAISES wait for God in Zion: for Zion then hath answer of her prayers. ^Ps. ⁶ 5 ^.1

10. Q.

Whether find you a tickling of pride or hypocrisy, when so many people, and some great ones come to see you? Do you not ask who were the Great people, when they are gone? and take pride in it?

[A like Question, and her Answer to it, was before. Another time when a Noble Lady sat on the bed by her, and she was not moved at it, one whispered to her, that this was a great Lady: She answered Its no more to me, then if it were such a one: naming a meaner woman troubled in Spirit, that oft came to her.]

And now to this Question she answered, No; its far from me. For if I were in a Wilderness, where none came to me; I should take as much glory there as in such abundance coming to me in this place . For the Saints of God will give thanks for me in general, though they know me not in particular. And unless it were some that I knew before, I know not any that come; and I look not upon them, unless it be on some troubled people that come: for I inquire after these: but I inquire after none else.

11. Q.

How know you those that come hither, that they are truly troubled for sin? For many will make as though they were so, but are not.

Ans.

None knows the secrets of God, but himself. And those to whom he reveals his secrets to, by their own experience they may guess at it, who is, and who is not . One that is indeed burden'd for sin, its not an easy burden for them to lie under: they would be out in it, if they could. These are weary of their sin: and anything else can content them, but a glimpse of the love of God, in the face of Jesus Christ . So far I guess then to be really troubled for sin.

12. Q.

How put you a difference in the Trinity between the Father, the Son, and the Holy Ghost!

Ans.

These three do all agree in one, and they differ not in working a New Creation in the soul. They are three in manifesting their workings. For, None can come to the Son, except the Father who gave them to him, draw them: There's the Fathers work, is give and draw them . For these the Son lays down his life, and receives them: All that thou hast given me, shall come unto me : I have kept them, and lost none. Its the work of the Spirit, to unite the soul and Christ together, to make of twain one . Thus their three works are manifested to the soul. Yet these three agree in one.

[ June 3. The Relator asked her further about this Mystery of Three in one.

S. Ans.

The Father, Son, and Spirit are in Union: These three agree in one: and so there's no disagreeing or differences therein: But there are various dispensations to the creatures capacity; so there are three:

First, the Father, that in his love sent the Son to reconcile sinners to himself

Secondly, the Son the Word who was sent, that took our Nature; to redeem us from all iniquity and to bring us to the Father.

Thirdly, the holy Spirit, who was sent by the Father in Christ's name , to manifest this love of the Father, and of the Son, to the Creature: which the Creature could not know, but by the Spirit of God , who quickens them that were dead in sin : and he teacheth and leads the soul into all truth .]

13. Q.

May 31. was; Whether is anything revealed to you, how it shall go with the Church of God?

Ans.

I know, and verily believe it shall go well with those that fear the Lord.

How mean you in spiritual, or in outward things?

Ans.

Specially in spiritual, I mean: and so far as it is for their good, in outward things, God will dispose of them.

14. Q.

She having said, that her sanctification as well as her justification did proceed from Christ: M ^r Adderley asked her how the proved it?

Ans.

I believe that out of the side of Christ, did issue both blood, and water . Blood to take away the guilt of my sin: and water to wash away the filth of my sin . So that from my Lord Jesus Christ, doth issue both my justification, and my sanctification. He is made to me, Wisdom, Righteousness, Sanctification and Redemption.

Another maid that was not born in England, being in affliction, both in soul and body, came to her telling her of her sad Temptations: (her words were better understood by M ⁱ rs Sarah, then by the writer and sometimes were guessed at, from the Answers given to her; ( viz. )

Maid.

I am sore assaulted by Satan.

M ⁱ rs Sarah.

Christ is lifted up, and held out to you, as the Brazen Serpent was in the Wilderness Though you are stung by the old Serpent, yet healing is in Christ for such as you. Shall your sin separate from Christ?

Maid.

I know it shall not, if Christ were willing to save me, for he is able to do it.

Mrs S.

Do you question the willingness of Christ He is your King, & he will save you . He is as wiling to heal you, as you are to be healed. He gave his life so saving the ungodly, and sinners ; therefore he is willing to save them. Do you desire after Christ?

Maid.

Yea I desire him with all my heart. I long for him.

M ^r s S.

Its he that works the will and the deed: he works that desire in you.

Maid.

I feel that God is angry with me.

M ^r s S.

His anger is but for a moment: but his mercy is for everlasting.

Maid.

Yea, if I could believe.

Mr _s S.

Do you see a want of Faith? thats your chief want: If you had Faith, you had enough: and this is true Faith, to believe that Christ died for you the chiefest sinners.

Maid.

I am a filthy wretched sinner.

M _r s S.

Who was a sinner like me? Who was worse then Mary Magdalene , then Peter , then Paul ? Yet they obtained mercy. Are you tempted against your life?

Maid.

I am oft tempted against my life.

M ^r s S.

Why, what causeth it?

Maid.

Sometimes this, because I am not as others _a re: I do not look so, as others do.

M _r s S.

When Christ comes and manifests himself to the soul, it is black in it self, and uncomely : but He is fair and ruddy, and he clothes the soul with his comeliness that he puts on it, and makes it comely therein: and in him the soul is all fair, and there is no spot nor wrinkle, nor any such thing in it, in his account; because he hath cleansed it by his blood, from all sin. Its not you that do it, but Christ that will do it: as he saith, This is my Covenant ; I will be merciful to their iniquities; and, I will give you a new heart; I will put my fear in you heart; I will write my Laws there. Though the soul cannot believe at all; yet he remains faithful, and cannot deny himself : he saith not, he will not, but he saith, he cannot deny himself.

Maid.

He may do this for some few, but not to me.

M ^ris Sarah.

He doth not this to me only, nor to our Nation only, for, many Nations must be blessed in him . He came to give his life for a ransom for many to give himself for the life of the world . He is a free agent; and why should you exclude yourself?

Maid.

I had a light followed me: but now he is hid from me.

M ^ris Sarah.

The House of Jacob was the Church of God: and yet be hid himself from them.

Maid.

I am a dry barren ground.

M ^ris Sa.

Christ will pour water on the dry and thirsty land. He satisfies the hungry soul with good things . Its all done by Christ already, for poor barren souls: there is nothing now to do, but to manifest it by the spirit to you. You know God hath made you, and he bare you up this while. Do you think any could do this but God? and hath he done all this for you. & do you think he will not deliver you? Did he bear and carry the Israelites, that had be bond-slaves in Egypt, through the Wildernes, into Canaan, ( notwithstanding all their sins and provocations, and hardness of heart;) and will not he bear you, and carry you, out of yourself, into himself though you be a bondslave to sin and Satan? He work and none shall let him. Who shall let the mighty God? shall sin or Satan? He works where he will and when he will. Though he tarry, wait for him: for he that shall come, will come, and will notarry.

The Relator spake afterwards with this afflicted Maid ; she told him the Lord had given some support and refreshing to her, since that conference. The Lord alone be exalted for it, who works all our works for us, and in us. For what have we, (any of us) that we have not received ? And where then is boasting? It is excluded.

June 2. A godly man came to her, and told her, he was convinced in his Conscience to come, to inquire the truth about an ill report he then had heard and judged it was false: it was this; That some great persons having come to her from Westminster : she being told thereof, that she said; A greater then Solomon was there : as if she gloried more in herself, then in the work of Christ in her. To whom M ^ris Sarah answered thus: . Its far from me to glory in myself, but in my infirmities ; and to lie down in my shame, and to have confusion cover me. In my terror it was far from me; and now seeing a glimpse of the love of God, it doth humble me thoroughly: which nothing else could. And now, if I should glory in this work, but only in exalting Christ, it would be as great a sin, as ever I committed yet: but only the sin of unbelief . The truth was thus; One day, amongst others that came, one told her, there were some that came far, and desired to hear her speak, what God had done for her: She answered saying; The Queen of Sheba came far to hear this Wisdom of Solomon; but behold, a greater then Solomon is here . Christ himself, to work a New Creation in the soul: To turn me from the ruling power of Satan, and utter darkness, to his everlasting light to turn a Prodigal to himself: even me, that was a bad, or rather worse; yet he hath turned me. It was his work to turn me, therefore he deserves the praise of his own work. To clothe Legion in his right mind , & set him at his feet: yea in his bosom. It was his love indeed to such a one as I. This I say, that Christ may have the Praise of his own work, and none else: because he does it alone.

This was what she said at that time, to those from Westminster : and many mo being there is the room; and her voice, through her weakness, being very low ; whether some heard her speak but put of the words beforesaid; or some that her speech was related unto, God knoweth: but some did distract from, and wrested her Expressions; and then raised an ill report.

If the receiver be as bad as the Thief; one had need be wary, lest he receive prohibited goods.

Some other false reports, some have made, and others have spread already but this may be an Item to all, to take heed, what they hear, and of whom: and to warn all that are professed Christians, not to come short of Aristide a professed Heathen ;

who used to lend but one ear to a party present, that informed him against one absent; and to lay his hand on his other ear; signifying to the reporter, that he would reserve one ear for the party absent; and not judge the case, till he heard the other also.

Shall not Aristides, and heathen Foestus rise in judgment against many in our generation, and condemn them? When we see how Foestus also would not pass judgment against Paul being absent, though he had information against him, not by one or two, but by many, and those also being of his own sect and Religion in the main, and of special note and strictness among them: yet being desired by them, he refused it, saying, It is not the manner of of the Romans, to deliver any man to dy, (so to judge him,) before that he which is accused, have the accusers face to face; and have license to answer for himself, concerning the crims laid against him.

June 3. 1647. She told the Relator, how the Lord prevented her ruin, about Feb. last, viz. That one night she watched till her Mother was asleep; and then stole out softly from her, taking the key of the buttery door; which she opened, went in, and locked it to her, taking the key with her, so to make surer her dispatch without lett: and there being a window to the House-tiles, she crept out, (to do like Judas, so cast herself down to dissolve her self;) and in the dark she saw there a fire, and Satan as a roaring Lyon in it: yet still being persuades (through his delusion) there was no other hell, but that she felt in her conscience; she went within a quarter of a yard of the edge, being ready to leap down, when none should see or hear her; and nor was no creature to hinder; then was this spoken to her distinctly; Thou shalt not fall down, and burst asunder, as Judas did, and so dishonor God that make thee. Upon this, the sight vanished, as if it never has been: and she fell not down, being thus kept from it; and sat down by the chimney there; and after a while, beat her head against it, till it sweld abundantly: and the more she dashed it, (then, and at other times,) the less she felt it. Her tender Mother awaking, missed her, and sought about, and cause one to break open that buttery door: and cry out, and there found her Daughter ; who has not power then to leap down from her; but when her Mother would have her come in at the window, she tumbled down, her head falling on the bricks: which, with other such hurts before and after, (she oft so beating her head,) was one occasion of her head and eyes so great weakness of late.

After that desperate attempt, she had secretly got a knife, and hid it, to dispatch her self withal and then was she glad, and not so troubled: so that her Mother hoped she was now better. And on a Monday morning, she desired of her Mother, to hear the Lecture at night by M ^r Carter at Fishstreet-hill, and first entreated she might go see a neighbor; which her Mother granted, hoping she now might trust her to go. That neighbor not being within, it was cast in her mind to go to Lambeth-Marsh, (which she had also purposed in the morning,) there to dispatch her self: and therefore had she taken the knife with her. Over the bridge she thus went, and quickly came to Lambeth-Marsh ; There she went towards the Trees, and saw them dry without leaves, or fruit; and thought, so was her soul, as they. She sat down by a ditch; and studied whether she should drown her self in Thanies, or there? and concluded there ; because there it was more private, that none might hinder her. Then she thought, (as she had often thought on the like sad occasion,) she must like Judas, first repent, & then undo her self: as if that would serve. Whilst she was about this, two that seemed to be Ministers, saw her sitting there alone, came to her, and asked her, how she did, (for now they saw her weeping;) and why she sat there? She had no power to conceal it, but said; I am not well, I am as sad a Creature as any on earth. I see my condemnation, and nothing else. I cannot be well, till I have taken away my life.

Min.

Whither were you going?

S. Ans.

I had thoughts of hearing M ^r Carter in Fish-street-Hill.

Min.

This is not a place for such a one to sit in: and by God's help, we will bring you thither. So thither they brought her. But as she went, It was put in her mind to go thence that night to the Dog-house, (she had heared of) in Moorfields, there to offer her self to the Dogs, to eat her up, that her Mother might never hear of her more. But at the Sermon her Mother seeking her, espied her: and she again hid her self beyond others: but her Mother again found her, and had her home. This was but about a Moneth before April 6. beforesaid, of her deliverance.

June 8. being Tuesday the Lecture -day there, (where M ^r Ed: Richardson of Yorkshire the Relators friend, was desired to preach:) upon occasion of two Passages in his Sermon, two Questions were put to her. (Her answers were suitable to his resolutions.)

Qu. 1.

Whether persons that rightly believe in Christ, do not first feel their great need of him?

S. Ans.

The Gospel is the Ministry of the Spirit. He convinceth of sin, because they believed not: and what great need they have of Christ: and till then, they never rightly believe. I have found it hath been so with me. No sin is like the sin of unbelief. The enemy is the Grand enemy of the soul: that sin, is the Grand sin of the soul. Though it be the great sin of all, and the damning sin; That yet Jesus Christ should not only bid such a one believe, but give it to believe, it is to be admired.

2. Quest.

Whether many are not worse, by hearing the Gospel of Grace in Christ to the ungodly, and chiefest of sinners?

S. Ans.

Many are worse, and many are better. The Word by the Gospel is to be preached to the world of sinners; that is, the Word which became flesh . That Christ came not to be ministered unto, but to minister, and to give his life a ransom for many . He is not to be ministered unto by works of our righteousness, or our preparing ourselves first for him, or any worthiness in ourselves, but to minister, that is, to supply our wants: first the Spirit, and therewith, righteousness, peace, and joy; which make an empty soul, full indeed ; and to give his life, not so sell it to them that have money, but to give it, to them that have none: his life, no less price: a ransom for us bondslaves: that were in bondage, to Satan, sin, and corruption: for many, for a numberless number, that none can number; so they are indeed, if all be gathered together: though but a few in comparison of the rest: for many are called, but few are chosen . Its there, for many; here for few. Many are called by the word to Believe, and to Repent: all, where the Gospel comes: but few are called out of their sinful state.

June 10.47. It being now above 75. days since she did eat at all: and full 65. days since she did sip or drink two days together, her drink being only fair water for about twenty days: and since that, some small beer: and both these only at once still in two, three, or four days; of late in four or five days once; and then no more till about so long after; (she having never been able to stir out of bed, since April 6. being 65. days, through her great weakness, especially in her head, by her so beating it against walls in her Terror: ) and now she being very weak, unlikely to live, unless she took somewhat; [except he who so miraculously had upheld her so long, should hold out the same great power and goodness still unto her; she not having taken so much as a sip of anything at all, for four or five days last, nor so much as moistened her mouth or lips in all that time: and had enjoyed very little rest, for a week together, or more:] The Relator perceiving it now, (as from time to time formerly) spake to her about eating or drinking somewhat.

S. Ans.

I am not hungry nor thirsty.

Rela.

I have sometime neglected my body, till I saw I must not wrong the Temple of the Holy Ghost : and then I durst not but eat, though I had no mind to it; because tis an ordinary means of preserving life and health.

S. Ans.

I cannot do it; I do not abstain out of willfulness, for I would if I could: nor have I any command or temptation in my spirit against it, as if I should not: but it is, because I cannot. When I have tried, I am the worse by it, I cannot digest it, and the smell of it hurts me.

The Relator durst not then further urge her: and being ready to depart; She entreated his visiting some of the despairing souls, that had been with her; and to pray for them : and for her self, that she might quietly submit to the will of God, to live or die; for she found not such contentedness to live, as she desired, but rather longing to be dissolved, to be with Christ, which was best of all for her. (Phil. 1. 23.)

So lie left her more drooping, weak, and pensive, then at any time; she now to the eye of man, drawing near to death, as he apprehended, and was much affected with it; & spake of it to some.

But yet remembering some expressions of Faith, that she had uttered before, touching the raising up of her body, as well as her soul ( pag. 33. 35.) he had hopes the Lord would yet raise up her body, to the praise of his Name, and the refreshing of others, that are despairing, disconsolate souls.

And now behold and see the LORD'S doing: for it is marvelous, and worthy to be remembered.

That day, and until about ten of the Clock at night, & all that week before-going, especially (on, &) since Tuesday beforesaid, she had these words following her, and still as it were spoken to her again & again: viz. With long life will I satisfy him. ( Ps. 91. 16.) At first she took it to be meant of Eternal life in glory, and rejoiced in it. But when it was opened to her, to be also of long life here: She thought, that would not satisfy her; and therefore she would not regard it: being so desirous to be absent from the body, and to be present with Jesus Christ. 2 Cor. 5.8. a little glimpse of him that she felt, was so sweet, she so desired the full fruition of him, that she was not so contented to live, as was meet: and as now (having a sight of it) she desired prayer for her, that she might be; and that she might quietly lie down at the feet of God, to do with her as he would: that she might not be so weary of the condition the Lord allotted to her. About ten at night, this came in, as if it had been whispered to her soul from God; Thou hast not wearied me with thy sacrifices; but thou hast wearied me with thy sins: Yet I, even I am he, that blotteth out thy transgressions, for mine own Names sake ; and will remember them no more forever: no not forever. Thou art mine, my desire is towards thee. I will heal thy backslidings; I love thee freely, I forgive all thy sins for my Names sake; as though they had never been committed. Come and see, how I have loved thee! How I have ever loved thee! Behold and admire this love of mine. Fathom this sea of my love if thee canst, which drowns the multitude of thy sins: and see how I have ever loved thee from eternity, with an endless, boundless, and everlasting love: the number of thy sins, and multitude of thy transgressions against me, shall never be able to separate the union that I have made between thee & me.

This manifestation exceedingly melted her heart; and the more abased her soul before him: And she said; Lord, What will thou have me to do? It was answered, as that to Paul, [ Act. 22. 10.] Arise and go into Damascus, and there it shall be told thee what thou shalt do: So (it was given her to understand that) she must arise from that sinful condition, and go, out of her self, to Christ, and he would tell her what she must do. And as he said to Paul, (Act. 26. 16.) Rise, and stand upon thy feet: For I have appeared to thee for this purpose, to be a Minister and a witness, both of the things thou hast seen, and in which I will appear unto thee. So God had bid her Arise, and he had raised her soul from the lowest hell; and now he persuaded her, that he will raise up her body also: that she might be a Witness of the Grace of God, to minister to others, what he had administered unto her. And that as Paul should be a witness, both of the sufferings of Christ for him, and of his own sufferings for the Name of Christ: So she should be a witness of both in like manner: and set to her seal, that God is true, in whatsoever he hath spoken, and cannot deny himself. And as Paul, when he was to live, and to suffer many things; He said, None of these things move me, neither count I my life dear unto myself, so that I may finish my course with joy, and the Ministry. (Act. 20. 24.) So she must not count her life dear to herself, no not her being with Christ, which is far better then this life being confident, that she should finish her course with joy: and now she must testify and minister that Grace of God that she had received, unto others.

Other places of ministering to others were brought into her, besides that of Paul. Another was of Peters wives Mother, Mark. 1. 30. Anon they tell Jesus of her: and he came and took her by the hand, and lift her up: and immediately the fever left her: and she ministered unto them. Not to Christ only, but to others. And so must she. As Christ himself came, not to be ministered unto, but to minister. Mark. 10. 45.

A Third place was, Luk. 5. 20. 25. where Christ said to the man that was sick of the Palsy; Man, thy sins are forgiven thee. There he first cured the soul; and then the body, saying, Arise, and take up thy Couch. And he arose, and went, and glorified God ; declaring to others what God had done for him. And so must she.

Besides those three or four places of ministering to others, there were six places more brought to her, of such as Jesus Christ raised up by his power: and they were set on with power on her soul. One was Luk. 7. 14. Christ said to the Widows son, Young man, I say to thee, Arise: and he that was dead, sat up, and began to speak. Yet she desired, if she might have a place to her more particular. Then was given in that in Luk 8. end; where Christ said; Maid, arise. And after that a third place, Mark. 10. 49. It was said to the blind man by Christ's Disciples; Be of good comfort; rise, He calleth thee. He called, that won'd make him whole every whit. (This was suitable to her whose eyes were so weak, and dim.

A fourth place, Act. 9. 34. Peter said to AEneas, Jesus Christ maketh thee whole, and he arose immediately.

A fifth place was, Act. 3.6. In the Name of Jesus Christ of Nazareth, arise and walk: and he arose immediately, and leaped, and praised God: So thou in the power, and efficacy of the power of Jesus Christ of Nazareth, arise and walk; Jesus Christ maketh thee whole. Then had she Faith given her, and Power instantly, that she could arise: but her Mother being asleep in the bed with her, she forbare, till her Mother did awake in the morning.

Yet there came one place more, (more full, more particular, and more familiar,) Mark. 5. end, Talitha cumi; Damsel, I say to thee, Arise; and straightway she arose, and walked. And he commanded that somewhat should be given her to eat. Here was her Eating, Arising, & Walking. And a full persuasion was given her therewith, that so it should be with her self. Thus she lay, fully confirmed therein; not sleeping that night at all, but enjoying sweet communion with God, till the morning. And June 11. when her Mother awoke, and was arising, she spake to her, with tears in her eyes, being grieved that (through that foresaid pensivenes) she had not spoken a word to her Mother, and thereby might offend her; entreating her pardon; which was sooner granted, then asked. Then she declared what sweet refreshings the Lord had given in, that night, with power to her soul, in behalf of her bodies restoring: and named the several places beforesaid, the Chapter and verse, as they were given in to her that night, so as they never had been given in to her in all her life before; desiring the Maid that tended her, to turn to the Scriptures, one by one; which she did; and read them, to the last: She declaring what power came with the words into her: the last place, being, Damsel, I say to thee Arise, — and he commanded that somewhat should be given to her to eat. So now she desired, they would give her somewhat to EAT. It being demanded what? She would they should give her some broiled fish. Which was a strange expression to them, from her, that had not eat a crumb of bread, or other meat, in 76. days; nor so much as wet her lips for the last four or five days. But she speaking with such power and evidence, they believed. Fish was got, and broild, and brought to her: and she with joy in the Lord, did eat of it heartily before them. And said; She did eat it, because Jesus Christ had sweetened it before: Therefore she said, she found as much savor, and satisfaction, and delight in it, as if she had all the dainties and delights in the world in one: So was this unto her.

Having eaten, and been refreshed, and blessed the Lord; (not finding the least distemper or inconvenience at all thereby;) Then she called for her clothes, (who had not been able to arise, no nor to hold up her head any while in the bed, since the sixth of April to this 11 ^th of June, being 66. days:) Her clothes being given her, she put them on, and arose, and stood on her feet, and sat down in the Chamber, joyful in the Lord, receiving no hurt thereby. When she called for the Fish, (as she said,) she had this apprehension cast into her: Thou hast fasted long; thou shalt fast no longer; it was but to make my power known to the sons of men, what I have done, and what I can do. (2 Cor. 12.9.)

Thus the Lord gave a prolonging of her life, by Faith in the Name of Jesus Christ of Nazareth. Thus by faith she did Eat, and Arise ; and believed she should Walk also. The two former she did that instant June 11. The third was reserved to try her and others, till the Lord should see fittest.

[About the same time of June beforesaid, the Relator heard of one H. T. that then had great enjoyments of God, and could not take in a crumb or sip of the creatures, for full six days together; yet being in bodily health. It being believed by many good people, the Relator desired to speak with the party, who is of approved godliness ; and did; and was certified thereby of the truth thereof, viz. from Iun. 9. the end, till the beginning of Iun. 16. 1647. And that both in that time, and before, the Lord had given in several discoveries of things to come. Some particulars whereof were then related, ( viz. Iun. 19.) It seemed strange to him. Yet he durst not then reject it, being related in a tender modest manner, exalting God therein. Since this he hath recalled.

1. That its no where said in Scripture, that Prophecy, or Miracles, or Knowledge are ceased.

2. That M ^r Fox in the Book of Martyrs, cites many Miracles wrought, and Prophecies uttered, both in the first hundred of years after the Apostles, and in the second, third, fourth, fifth, and so on to his time. The like do Eusebius, Socrates, and other Ecclesiastical approved Authors, unto their times. M ^r Fox cites Prophecies of late times, revealed to John Hus, to Martin Luther, yea and to himself. Besides other experiences he hath known of.

3. He hath weighed several Scriptures, that seem to hold out such things; as, Job. 16. 8. 13. I will send the Comforter, and he shall convince of sin, of righteousness, &c.—And he will show you things to come: and Act. 11. 28. Act. 21. 11. 9. Agabus, and Philip's daughters prophesied, Act. 2. 13. 16, 17.— 33. 38, 39. with Job. 7.38. 1 Cor. 12.8. 10. 28. 31. 1 Cor. 14.1. &c. Hence he feared to judge or speak ill of what he knew not, and had no experience of in himself: But rather judged, he should try the Spirits whether they are of God, because false Prophets are in the world, 1 Joh. 4. 1. Rev. 2. 2. And should admire the Lord in his grace to worthless worms: and should pray for the accomplishment of the aforesaid Scriptures ; as the Disciples prayed thus; Now Lord, behold their threatenings, and grant to thy servants, that with all boldness they may speak thy word ; (the means thereof followeth,) by stretching forth thy hand to heal: and that signs and wonders may be done by the Name (or power) of thy holy child Jesus, Act. 4. 29, 30. & Luk. 17. 5, 6.]

To return: M ^ris Sarah Wight arose from bed, and sat up daily, from June 11. till the 25. being Midsommer quarter day. Yet she remained weak. Her Mother and her self before Iun. 25, desired that such as had sought the Lord for her, might solemnly Praise the Lord with her, for so answering prayer, for her soul and body. It was concluded to be Iun. 26. When, behold, the Lord gives in the third mercy before believed and hoped for, the very day foregoing it; that their mouths might be the more filled with the High Praises of God, for this addition, viz. that by Faith she was strengthened, (as before to eat, and to Arise: so) now to WALK. And thus it was, (as her self related it the same day, viz. Iun. 25. 1647.) The night before it, she was very ill, till about two in the morning. Then was it hinted into her spirit, that formerly the Lord had promised to her, that she should Arise, and Walk and eat: And as he had performed two of them, in causing her to ARISE, and to EAT ; so now he was to fulfill the Other, in causing her to WALK. Then several Scriptures were brought in to her, with life and power: amongst others, these; Act. 3. 6. Peter said to the Criple, In the Name of Jesus Christ of Nazareth, arise and walk: and immediately he received strength; and stood and walked, and praised God.

Another was Job. 5. 8. Jesus said to the man at the Pool, Rise and walk: and immediately the man was made whole, and walked. Another was Dan. 10. 17-19. When Daniel was weak, one from God touched him, and said, O man greatly beloved, fear not, Peace be unto thee; Be strong, yea be strong. He was weak in Spirit, and in body; and here it is twice said, Be strong: and now he was strengthened in body as well as in spirit; and he said, Let my Lord speak, for thou hast strengthened me.

Another place was, Cantic. 2. 10, 11. Rise up my love, my fair one, and come away. For the winter is past. (With this Paraphrase) The winter of afflictions, and temptations is past; and the summer of joy and consolation is come: and the Sun of righteousness is risen, which makes it a summer indeed.

The last place hinted in, was Ephes. 3. 16. That he would grant, according to the riches of his Glory; to be strengthened with might by his Spirit, in the inner man. This (said she, in relating it in the morning,) was spoke to me; and I did believe it was so absolutely. And as Daniel was strengthened immediately; So was I strengthened immediately: and was vile, and would be more vile in mine own eyes, that the Lord alone may be exalted.

Thus she told her Mother, and another Christian friend: and said she had received strength.

Having declared this, with joy in the Lord, in the morning, Iun. 25, being Midsummer day, 1647. then she her self opened her head and scombed it: which she durst not suffer to be done the day before, no nor for about twenty-four weeks before; because it was so exceeding weak and ill, through her so beating it in her former terror, that she feared it would not hold well together, if it were opened: and of late she had not bodily strength to do it, till that morning. And now, having dressed it, she neither fainted, nor got cold thereby: but desiring her Mother, with the Maid, to call on the Lord, who is worthy to be praised ; she got up immediately, and stood on her feet, and WALKED, Praising the Lord. She not having walked, nor had so much bodily strength, in fourscore days before: namely, not since that sixth of April beforesaid.

Thus the Lord the more fitted her for rendering Praise to his Name the day following: And hereby he gave in to her friends, greater encouragement, and the more occasion of High Praises to our God.

Iun. 26. the day appointed thereto being come, there met together M ^r Barker Minister in Garlic hill London, and the Relator, M ^r Sprig, M ^r Brag, and M ^r Isaac Knight, lately of Holland, with many other Christian friends, to magnify the Lord with them. It was a sweet and joyful day to many there assembled: Much of God was seen therein.

The Party walked down, from an upper, to a middle-room, the place prepared for the duty; she being veiled; the Lord having made her the more low in her own eyes, and having the more melted and humbled her soul, by the greatness of his goodness towards such an one: (which frame, the Lord continue to the end.)

The Occasion of the meeting was declared; Many of the most material of the former passages of the Lord's special providence, being related, in a way to exalt the LORD alone, and not a worthless Creature.

Praises were then rendered to the Name of the Lord, which is exculted above all blessing and Praise. In special with respect to this mercy, to soul and body: and to the Glorious Attributes of God, manifested herein.

Some Instructions were also given, for some direction and furtherance herein, both to the Party her self, and to her Mother, and to all present. Amongst others, some from 2 Chron. 32. 25. But Hezekiah rendered not again, according to the benefit done unto him; for his heart was lifted up; therefore there was wrath upon him.

Whence was observed:

1. That the mercies of God, require renderings unto God: rendering the glory thereof to him.
2. That the measure of rendering back, that the Lord looks should be endeavored, is, according to the benefit done to them.
3. That all neglect of thanks or rendering again, springs from pride, or the lifting up of the heart, thats the root.
4. That the Lord's choice servants, are very subject the fearful sins of pride and unthankfulness. ]
5. That the wrath of God is against [ pride and unthankefulnes: The Lord takes it heavily, when his people walk [ proudly or ] unthankfully. The first was then insisted upon; which being opened, confirmed, and applied; and Praises further rendered, with prayer suitable: there was then a time of bodily refreshing in a cheerful manner, after the middle of the day, eating and drinking of what was sweet and pleasant: that it might not be as a day of Fasting. ( ) This was but short, and moderate; that it might be no hindrance, but rather a furtherance to the main work then intended. Having eaten, and blessed the Lord; further Instructions were given from the words of our Lord Jesus to his own Disciples, in Luke 10.20. In this rejoice not that the Spirits are made subject to you: but rather rejoice, that your Names are written in Heaven. Where is held out to us:
- 1. That evil Spirits have been made subject to Christ Disciples. [and so they shall be,
- 2. That the Prime cause of rejoicing is, that one knows, his Name is written in Heaven. He is known there what he is, he is of esteem there, he hath interest there, and happiness there.
- 3. That even the Disciples of Jesus Christ, are prone to be carnal or fleshly in rejoicing: and not so spiritual as is meet.

Praises (with prayer) again and again being rendered in the Name of Jesus Christ; and those for whom nothing is prepared, being remembered; (Neh. 8. 10.) and Conclusion being made; the Assembly in convenient time was dismissed; many being greatly refreshed in the Lord, who had thus exalted his great and glorious Name, in causing LIGHT, thus to shine out of DARKNES, restoring her soul from so deep despair: and thus wonderfully raising up her body, that had been long, to the eye of reason, ready to see corruption : And as her Brother M ^r Jonathan Vaughan, before her sowls enlargement, had writ from Oxford, confidently, that Jesus Christ would deliver her: (as is touched before in pag. 5.) So he having been brought to London by a good providence just at that time, to see it done, (as pag. 25. and 29.) when he was returned to Oxford before the end of April 1647. He writ thence; That he made no doubt, but the Lord would restore her body also to its perfect health ; though then it drew not to death: His words were these:

Most dear Mother, I am constrained to confess with thankfulness, that it was an Almighty Providence, indulgent to me, which brought me home to you in a most seasonable and acceptable time: in which have both heard and seen the goings forth of the Love towards my choice and precious Sister, to be in love, mercy, and peace. The strong man is dispossessed by stronger, Christ (the hope of Glory,) now reigning in her. I make no doubt, but the Great Physician, the good Samaritan, who hath poured out into her wounded Conscience his wine and oil; will restore her body to its perfect health: whereby she may be able in the land of the living to declare the Riches of the free Grace and love of God, to poor sinners. I came safe to Oxford, I praise God, &c.]

June 30 being the Monethly Fast-day, she went to Great Alhallows London, (it being near Lawrence Pountney ) and heard Mr Io. Simpson there, [he having known her soul in adversity, was desired to have helped there in the Day of Praises; but was hindered by his Preaching that day elsewhere; M ^r . Prime the Minister of Lawrence Pountney had an impediment, that hindered him also, where he was desired. [After the Fast-days Sermons were ended, her heart was drawn out to go to two women, that were in deep despair, for refreshing them by the comforts she had received, being greatly affected with their sad conditions: And the day following, being July 1. she so went, to another woman in like condition: (one of the former women, and this, having been with her several times of late, since her soul was comforted:) By speaking much to them, and by going so far, (about a mile (to and fro) this day, and about as far the day before,) she was much wearied and spont; so that her body was in some weakness, for some days after. And this was the more increased by the resortings to her daily, of many in London, who would draw out expressions from her, to her further spending of her small strength. Hence, that she might be the more retired, and recover strength, for further service among the little ones, that are afflicted, &c. her tender Mother hath procured for her a place in the Country near a friend there, a few miles distant from London. The LORD hath given her to enjoy much of himself in the City: as much may he give, hath he given her in the Country. We cannot leave her better, then in these enjoyments, which are a Christians ALL IN ALL.

Before that her retire into the Conntrey, the night before July 4. which was the First day of the week, called the Lord's day, (it being but three days before her removal into the Country,) she had a Dream or Vision; which left so deep an impression on her Spirit, that after she arose, she wrote it down, and related it to her Mother, and to the Maid ; by whom the Relator hearing of it, asked her about it, and desired to see the writing: The substance of it was this:

On Saturday-night last, I was in a Dream, in great terror, and so quaked, that the bed did shake under me. I so wept, that my face was wet, when I awoke. I apprehended myself violently hurried down a very steep hill; and being therewith terrified, it was darted into me presently, that it was the Hill where the swine that were possessed with Legion, ran down violently into the Sea, that was at bottom of that steep place. And as I was thus hurrying down the same, I saw as I apprehended Horses, red and white, and black, and of some other color, were running down before me. And being thus carried down a great way, and through the depth of it and darkness that was, I could see no bottom of it; being overcome thereby, I cried out to God, Lord help, I perish, I perish; I am not able I am not able to go down it. And wept. A voice presently answered me, I am able to carry thee upon Eagles wings. ) And instantly, one like the appearance of a man, (but the Glory of him was so great, I cannot express it; he) came, and took me in his arms; and carried me down to the bottom of the hill. And then he said to me concerning the the appearance of the Horses, that were hurried down before me ; These are all thy spirittual enemies; and I have trampled them under my feet And then he carried me in his arms up to the top of the hill: and then, and not till then, he told me the reason why he carried me, first down to the bottom of the hill, saying ; I could have carried thee at first to the top, and not to the bottom: but thus I did, that thou mayest prize the mercy the more, in delivering thee from the lowermost hell: and that thou mayest prize Heaven the more. And he further said, I have gone before thee, and have made crooked places straight before thee, and have broken in pieces the gates of brass, and have cut in sunder the bars of iron: I have done it for thee. He that carried me, and spake thus to me, was so glorious, that its beyond what I can express. Upon this I awoke, my cheeks being wet with weeping. And considering and musing about this; immediately this was brought to mind: Wherein have I made thee accepted? Is it not in my beloved Son, in whom my soul delighteth? ( Mat. 3.17. Eph. 1.6.)

The Glory of this was so great, she could not tell how to set it forth: and then was it brought to mind, that it is called in the Scripture, Riches of Glory, Ephes. 1. 18. Riches of his Glory, Eph. 3. 16. Glory of his Grace, Eph. 1.6. Riches of his Grace, Eph. 1. 7. Exceeding riches of his grace, Ephes. 2.7. In the morning the caused Hannah Guy, the Maid that attended on her, to turn to the places, and to read them.

The Relation hereof was taken as is before-said, the 7 ^th of July, 1647. being the day of her going from London into the Country, (to High-gate,) to be the more retired, that here was daily tired or wearied out, by many, especially afflicted ones in spirit, that daily resorted to her. (An honored friend, that would not be named, affording her the courtesy of the Coach, for her better conveyance.)

The LORD having thus far carried on his own glorious work in an Earthen Vessel, and brought things to such a sweet period; we may Conclude with joy in the Lord; having heard herein of his so notable and marvelous a work: of one he hath brought from the jaws of hell, to the joys of Heaven : from such Terrors (so occasioned) to such perfecting of praise, out of the mouth of a Babe : enabling such an one now, so to improve and make use of the holy Scriptures ; to despairing souls, and otherways. Raising up not only her soul, but her body also so wonderfully, by FAITH in his Son.

And now, Is this nothing to you, O ye that pass by, you that read, or that stand, or sit by? Is there nothing that the Lord hereby speaks to your heart? Mic. 6. 9. The LORD'S voice crieth to the City, and the Man of wisdom shall see thy Name: hear ye the Rod, and who hath appointed it. Hath the Rod a voice? Doth the rod of affliction speak to thee? Dost thou hear what it saith? And doth this Work of God's wisdom and mercy speak nothing to thy soul? If thou wouldst desire to make the best use thereof, but seest, thou art not such a man or woman of Wisdom, as to see and hear so fully as thou desirest what it may speak to thee; What honey may drop to thee out of this Rock : And therefore thou desirest to be helped herein, What benefit may come to us from this consideration?

Ans. Much every manner of way, if the Lord will please by his Spirit to put an edge to it, and to set it home to our hearts with a strong hand.

1 Use. Seeing the Works of God declare his Glory, and are for our edifying, as truly, and as well, as any other Ordinance, as Psal. 19. 1. Psal. 8. 3, 4. Psal. 145. 5, 6, 7, 10.) [I say not, as much as the word, Psal. 138. 2. but as truly, and so as well as it, Psal. 19.1—7, 8. Rom. 1.16.20. Act. 14.17. Act. 17. 26, 24.27. Act. 8.4, 5, 6, 7. Act. 10.35.42.]

1. That therefore, the Lord's special works the workings of his Holy Spirit, being honorable and majestical, are to be sought out (as most precious things) of all that have pleasure or delight in them, Psal. 111.2, 3. Seeing he hath done them to be remembered ; Why then is there a slackness in any of us, (who profess we delight in God and love him,) to search out such special works as these, when we hear some hint of them? Thus robbing God of that honor, and our selves of that good, that might have accrued thereby: and showing ourselves like the brutish man, Psal. 92. 5, 6. Psal. 28. 4, 5. Isa. 26.11.

2. Use. That we think not strange if we hear of some in deep despair, and judge not hardly of such, as speak great things against themselves: but rather judge, what a burden is the least sin, if it be felt as tis indeed? This is the fruit of sin: such may be nearer the enjoyment of mercy, then sinners in Zion, that are at ease: and then careless Daughters, Isa. 32.9.11. Isa. 33.7. Psal. 73.3, 4.14, 15.

3. Use. To be a Caution and as a Warning-Piece both to all Superiors and Inferiors. 1. To all Superiors ; whether Husbands, Parents, Masters, or any, Officers in State or Church, to beware of urging any, by any means, to do, speak, subscribe, or an anything against their Conscience, or with a doubting Conscience: though themselves are persuaded of the lawfulness of the thing, as it was with her superior: but yet as you have heard ( pag. 7.) this was one of the first chief occasions of this so terrible a condition to this lately afflicted handmaid, for divers years, and was no small occasion of trouble to the said superior afterwards.

2. Branch. The like Caution it may be also, to all Inferiors, to wives, to children, to servants, flock, and subjects ; against fearing man, that shall die, more then the living God : and obeying man, rather then God, by doing, speaking, or acting of anything, to please men; that the word or conscience show, to be displeasing to God. Lest for your so doing, your terrors and punishment, may be as great, or greater then those of this hand-maid, for the like offense: Yea lest God tear you in pieces, and there be none to deliver you, Psal. 50.22. and lest both you and your Commander repent, when it is too late.

I heard of a Maid in Suffolk, whose Parents feared she should grow too pure and precise: and on a Lord's day evening, the Mother bid her do some work: which she judging unlawful, (or at least doubting of,) entreated to be spared in it ; but her Father threatening to beat her, she did it, and the next morning she kept her bed; and so did she many weeks together upon it; being terrified in Conscience, for her preferring man before God: being unfit for work, it repented her Parents, and her self too, too late: I never could hear that she got any comfort.

Also a young Gentleman, being a scholar, of whose deep despairing of ever being saved, and of his strong persuasion that he should be damned, Master Case, Master Whitaker's, Master Chr. Love, and the Relator, with many other Preachers and Christians, had notice, and sad observation. His Father a Gentleman in the Country, brought him up to London to procure some to speak to him, and to pray for him, having him present with them. This Christian duty was solemnly performed by those before-named, and by others, in several solemn days of Fasting and Prayer. The beginning and chief first moving cause of those so sad persuasions was, because of the Oaths and Subscriptions imposed by the Governors in the University, which he submitted to (with the multitude that stuck not at them,) though he had his Conscience warning him; yet thus doubtingly, or against his Conscience, he yielded to the Ordinances of his Superiors. But his thus doing brought great sorrow on his own soul, and on his Parents and friends that sympathized with him. Amongst others, the Relator could more sympathize herein, then many others, in regard himself had been much afflicted in Spirit, for his University Oaths and Subscriptions: and yet had found though his sin abounded therein, (it being done with a staggering, (or worse, with a relucting) Conscience,) yet the Grace of God had the more abounded, and been magnified towards him, in manifesting that he had forgiven so soul and heinous sins.

After all means used with this young Gentleman, many several days, he returned home more wounded and terrified; because so many had taken so much pains with him, and he was no whit better ; and therefore far the worse in his account; as he showed after his return home, in many sad Letters, in black lines, to the Relator ; and because he could write no other language, but the language of hell, (as he said) he therefore would cease to weary him with it. And so he ceased writing. And although since that time, the Lord hath given him hopes of his love in pardoning his sins, and transgressions; yet these sad examples, (and many moe of like nature that might be produced,) may suffice for a Warning to Heads and Governors in Universities, and Corporations ; and to all Magistrates, Officers, Masters, Husbands, and Parents, all Superiors whatsoever; to beware of laying on heavy burdens, by Oaths, Subscriptions, or Commands, on any persons; whose Consciences when they are distressed, they are never able to relieve or release, from Hellish continual fears and torments. (Psal. 50. 22. Matth. 27.3, 4.)

And for all Persons, to keep the heart and Conscience, above all keeping; Fearing God, above all

Fifthly, Learn hence to fly Censuring the most vile and desperate of all sinners. Say not, they and Reprobates, though they are damned already in their own persuasion; as this Party was. So was M ^ris Honywood, M ^ris Drake, &c. and yet obtained mercy.

Sixthly, Be not weary therefore of using all good means for help to such as are hopeless and desperate as these parties were. The Lord may come in the last hour. He is not weary nor faint in seeking your good daily. However your labor of love is accepted of the Lord.

Seventhly, Limit not the Holy One of Israel any outward means whatsoever ; seeing he gave the Party Faith and glorious joy in himself, when she was struck deaf and blind ; that till that deafness was as one in hell already. But rather believe the Proverb, Jehovah ijreh, Jehovah will be seen in the Mount .

Eighthly, Exalt the Lord the Creator alone, and not the Creature: Say not, What a one is she? But, What a God is he ? in all reading, and speaking, of her, or to her. For the Lord is jealous of his glory, and will not give it to an image of him.

Ninthly, Behold here, what's the most effectual means of humbling the heart and melting it; and of furthering faith and love ; and whats the greatest support and comfort in the greatest troubles and burdens about sin: namely, the discovery of the abundant Grace of God in justifying the ungodly; in giving his own Son to reconcile enemies; and the love of Christ, whilst we were in our sins, and had nothing in us that is lovely, that yet he so loved us, as that he gave himself for us.

Tenthly, and lastly, Let all such as read or hear these wonderful dealings of the Lord herein; Consider how it is with their own souls.

First, If the Lord hath sealed thee by his Spirit to the day of Redemption: in the Spirit magnify God, and feed on him, and on his Sons love daily, in the Gospel promises and privileges: And the more thou hast received, be the more humble , and thankful to God, and serviceable to him in the Power of his Son; and the more pitiful, and tender to others , considering thyself .

Secondly, If thou hast no experience of such kind of speakings of the Spirit to thee, or of such manner or measure of Faith as here is mentioned; (both of which the Relator wanting, waits for;) 1. Do not decry, or cry down what thou knowest not. a. Envy not others. 3. Be not dejected, because more is given to others, then to thee: But bless the Lord in his various dispensations, that best knoweth what kind and measure is meetest for all, (Mat. 25.15 Eph. 4.7—16.4.) Pray for more pourings out of his Spirit, upon his sons and daughters, as he hath promised to do in the last days, (Act. 2. 17. 33.38, 39 John. 7.38, 39.

Thirdly, If thou art of a sorrowful spirit, by reason of sin; fearing, because it is so and so with thee, that there never was an effectual work upon thy heart; finding such a power of sin and corruption; such dullness, coldness, hardness of heart, laziness filthiness, pride, self-ishnes, or the like baseness: Doth not thou so much backward, in toiling to make out the former work, and still questioning about it, and how bad thou hast been, and art since; as forward, at that abundant GRACE herein magnified and ADVANCED to them that yet are a far off, without God, ungodly, enemies to him, to unfitted unprepared ones, to the CHIEFEST OF SINNERS.

Fourthly, If thou hast desires after full enjoyment of Jesus Christ, and some hopes that he is thine; but no assurance of it; Bless the Lord, and be thankful to him, that hath done so much for thee, that did more desire sin and vanity. But rest not in such desires, but seek and press hard for assurance.

And lastly, If thou hast long sought and waited for assurance that Christ is thine, and yet hast not attained it: 1. Beware of murmuring and quarrelling against God, and by this Example; seeing how grieve to her son & her murmuring hath been. 2. Despair not because she obtained mercy, that was so deep in that sin. 3. Wait humbly and patiently on the Lord, that hides himself, that thou mayest still seek, and the more prize his mercy, when at last he shall manifest it to thy soul. For therefore will the LORD wait, that he may be gracious to you: and therefore will he be exalted, that he may have mercy upon you: For the LORD is a God of judgment. BLESSED are all they that wait for him, Isa. 30.18. A power to wait, is also from him that bids you wait, and promiseth, that they that murmured, shall learn doctrine, (Isa. 29.24.) And to put his law in our heart, Heb. 8.10. Namely, to enable us, to what he commands us. THE GOD OF ALL GRACE, perfect the good work he hath begun in thee ; (Phil. 1.6.) To him be all glory by Christ Jesus, to - the age of ages, [ Eph. 3.21.] AMEN.

From July 7. till the end of September. 1647. she remained at High-gate, hoping then to return to LONDON: having eaten no bread nor flesh at all, since March last; and but very little of any other sustenance, through the weakness of her stomach: and yet looks as well as formerly: At the writing hereof, in this second Edition, September 27, 1647. H. J.

FINIS.

The Exceeding Riches of Grace

Project Note

TO HIS CHRISTIAN FRIENDS, Beloved in the LORD, in London, Cambridge, Yorkshire, Suffolk, Essex, and elsewhere; The Exceeding Riches of Grace be advanced.

TO HIS RESCPECTED FRIEND AND CHRISTIAN SISTER, M ris MARIE WIGHT, widow, in Lawrence Pountney in London.

M r Saltmarsh his Letter. For my dear and honored Friend and Cosen, M H. JACIE.

The CONTENTS or TABLE of the Book.

A TABLE of many of the choice places of holy SCRIPTURE, that in this Book are cited, opened, illustrated, or applied. (Where (*) is here added, the Translation is nearer the Hebrew or Greek.)

THE EXCEEDING RICHES OF GRACE ADVANCED.

TO HIS RESCPECTED FRIEND AND CHRISTIAN SISTER, M ^ris MARIE WIGHT, widow, in Lawrence Pountney in London.

M ^r Saltmarsh his Letter. For my dear and honored Friend and Cosen, M H. JACIE.